Secrets
by WaitCait705
Summary: Drew and Alli's break up leaves them both heartbroken and Drew's seemingly perfect life begins to crumble. Will a few dark secrets and a handful of obstacles have fatal consequences? Or can love save him in the end?  Includes eating disorders/cutting/ect.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: Hi everyone. This is my first fanfiction, so i hope you enjoy. I've been working on this for a few months, but I've been nervous to post it. Please let me know if you find any errors. I've spell check it about 3 times and had people read it, so there shouldn't really be any mistakes. Chapters will typically be a few POV's but let me know if you want them to be longer or shorter. So let's get started! **

**By the way, this takes place after Don't Let Me Get Me. **

**Enjoy and Review!**

**-Caitlin- **

Clare's POV

As Adam and I were sitting in English class, Mrs. Dawes was talking about the next novel we'd be reading. I had gone on an amazing date with Eli last night and I was dying to tell someone about it. With Alli gone, the only person left to tell was Adam.

"My date with Eli was incredible," I whispered across the aisle.

"I bet." Adam replied tiredly. I went into a full, detailed account of the date. Adam yawned.

"I'm boring you," I blushed embarrassedly. "Sorry." I smiled a small smile.

"No, it's not you," Adam said truthfully. "I got NO sleep last night thanks to my annoying brother." He rolled his eyes.

"Drew kept you up?" I questioned.

"Yeah. He talked to me for like 4 hours about how upset he was about Alli. You would've thought she died. After all that torture, he stay up until like 4 am crying. I've never seen him so messed up over a girl. It's been almost a week since she dumped him the second time and it's been 3 weeks since Vegas Night. He skipped dinner last night and I'm pretty sure he left without breakfast, too. I don't understand why he's still so messed up!" Adam looked slightly annoyed, but I could tell he was worried.

"That doesn't sound like Drew," I said in a concerned voice. I hate Drew for what he did to Alli, but I'm not a monster. The normally cocky and egotistic Drew sounded heartbroken.

"It's not. It's really weird. He just kept going on about how Alli was the best thing he's ever had and without her, he has nothing. I haven't seen him smile since she left. I think he's in love with her."

"If he loves her, why did he cheat on her?" Drew had cheated on Alli with a skank named Bianca a few weeks ago. That was the reason Alli left him.

"Drew is impulsive." Adam explained. "He doesn't ever think of the consequences. But I know for a fact he regretted it. He came home and told me everything that happened. He couldn't believe he did it. All he wanted to do was take it back."

"Adam, Clare! Please focus your attention up here," admonished Mrs. Dawes. Adam and I both turned our attention to the front of the class.

"We'll talk later," I whispered.

Adam's POV

I'm sitting in the kitchen with my mom, waiting for Drew to come home from football. I'm worried about him. He wasn't in lunch so I went looking for him. I found him in the library all alone. I hadn't seen him since. Just as I was about to tell my mom this, Drew walked in with his school stuff and football helmet in hand.

"How was practice?" Mom asked Drew as he put his stuff down on a chair.

"Fine," he replied in a monotone. He began to walk towards the stair case.

"Don't you want something to eat? You usually devour the whole fridge when you get home from football." She looked up at him with concern evident in her eyes.

"No. I'm going to my room." Drew turned and took the stairs two at a time.

"Is everything okay with Drew?" She asked me. I had been watching Drew since he walked through the door.

"Not really. Can't you see he's a mess?" I said critically. "He skipped dinner last night, breakfast this morning, and he wasn't even in the caf during lunch today. He just sat in the library. I mean of all the places Drew could've gone. .." I tailed off.

"What's wrong with him?" She sounded really worried.

"Alli broke up with him again and he's a mess. He kept me up all night with his crying. He said he lost the best thing he ever had." Mom scoffed.

"That awful girl. I don't think she's good enough for Drew. He can do so much better. He'll get over her soon, you know Drew. I'm just surprised he cried over her. I've never seen Drew cry over a girl."

"Yeah, I guess." I got up and walked out. I climbed up the stairs and went straight to Drew's room.

"Hey, is everything okay?" I said as I pounded on Drew's door. It was locked. Drew never locked his door, ever.

"Andrew! Open up!" I yelled again. I was starting to get worried.

Drew's POV

I heard Adam banging on my door, but I wanted to be left alone. I was lying face down on my bed drowning in my own misery.

I'm a screw up. I mess up everything in my life. I let those guys hurt Adam, I let Adam hurt himself, I'm failing every class, and I cheated on the best girlfriend I've ever had with a slut. This sucks.

At school I act like life is awesome because I'm a popular jock and girls are throwing themselves at me, but none of it matters. All I want is Alli back and my life not to suck. But Alli is at a school across town and I'll probably never see her again. Another thing in my life I screwed up. She gave me another chance and then dumped me. I have no idea what I did wrong but I should've known I'd screw it all up. I always do.

Soon the banging stopped. I guess Adam gave up. I opened my door and looked to see if anyone was there. I heard Adam and Mom's voices in the kitchen. It was safe. I quietly tiptoed into the bathroom Adam and I shared. I locked the door behind me and looked in the mirror. I looked like hell. My eyes were all red and swollen. I hadn't noticed I'd been crying. I'd been doing so much of it lately.

I needed to escape this. I've never considered myself the type of person to inflict self harm, but I felt I had no other choice. Adam used to burn himself when he was Gracie to let out the pain. Why couldn't I?

I rummaged through the draws looking for something, anything, I could hurt myself with. Finally I found a razor. This should do the trick. I looked down at my wrists. It would be too noticeable there because I never wore long sleeves. But there was nowhere else to cut. I finally decided on my upper arm instead, right above my elbow. I pressed the razor to my arm and slid it across. New tears sprung to my eyes as the pain hit me. When I started to bleed, I realized I didn't know the first thing about first aid. _Crap._ _How stupid am I?_ Unsure of what to, I just ran the cut under cool water and patted it with a towel. I let my tee shirt sleeve cover it and I walked out of the bathroom.


	2. Chapter 2

Adam's POV

"Mom! He's not opening the door!" I screamed at her. We had been fighting for a half an hour.

"Relax Adam. I'm sure Drew just wants some privacy." She was barely listening to me as she cooked dinner. "Help me set the table."

I sighed. I was no use talking to her about this. I angrily picked up the plates and glasses and set them on the dinner table. I was reaching for the forks when I heard Drew coming down the stairs. I turned to look just as he was coming into view.

"Hey," I said cautiously. He turned to us.

"Hey," he said in his normal, upbeat voice. He even smiled.

"Are you alri-" My mom cut me off with a death glare. I sighed. "Are you ready for dinner?" I asked instead, glaring right back at her.

"Nah, I'm going out, maybe to the Dot." He said as he put on his jacket.

"Okay honey. Be back by 9:30." Mom said without looking up from what she was doing. I personally couldn't take my eyes off of Drew. What had changed? He was acting like his normal self again.

"Bye Mom! Bye Adam!" Drew called as he walked out the door.

Clare's POV

"… and he just walked out all happy and chipper." Adam said disgustedly. We've been talking about Drew for the past 10 minutes.

"Well, it sounds like Drew's back to normal then." I always sort of thought Drew was a self centered jock. Him being so torn up about Alli had shocked me. I really wasn't surprised that he was over it so quickly.

"Yeah, I guess," he said unconvinced.

"Well I have to go," I said as the call waiting flashed Eli's name. "Talk to you in English?"

"Got someone more important to talk to?" Adam joked. "Well yeah. See you tomorrow." Adam hung up and I answered the other line.

"Hey Eli," I said into the phone.

"Hey Edwards," he replied. I could tell he was smirking. "Hot date at the Dot?" He asked before I could reply.

"Um…" I listened to my parents fighting downstairs. "Yes, that sounds great." I smiled a huge smile. My parents were almost always fighting so I was glad to get out of the house.

"Great, I'll be at your house in a few minutes," he said.

"Can't wait," I said as a hung up.

Clare's POV

"Hey you," I said as I slid into Morty.

"Long time no see," he smirked. He was referring to his suspension. "So how is school?

"Agonizing without you," I said dramatically with a smile playing on my lips.

"Oh, is that so?" He retorted. Eli and I always had this kind of back and forth. Adam says our banter was sickening. I laughed but then remembered Adam.

"Adam's worried about Drew," I said biting my lip.

"Why?" Eli said. He seemed confused by the sudden change of subject.

"He's apparently been a mess since Alli broke up with him. Not eating, not sleeping, that kind of stuff," I said trying to recall exactly what Adam had said.

"Drew's not eating?" Eli said with a laugh. "That's a first." Eli had been at Adam's when Drew practically ate the whole fridge after a football game. Still this was not a joking matter.

"Eli," I chided. "Adam sounded really worried." I started to nibble at my nails.

"You worry too much, Saint Clare," Eli said as he slid into a parking space outside that Dot.

"Speak of the devil," I said. I saw Drew walking into the Dot with his hands in his pockets. Eli got out of the car and went around to open my door.

"See? He's probably here to get a huge hamburger and fries. With an extra large shake!" Eli grabbed my hand and we walked into the Dot.

"You're right," I said smiling into his eyes. We walked in and got a table. I saw Drew take a seat at the counter. Eli and I looked over the menu and chatted. I couldn't help but notice Drew hadn't ordered anything yet.

"Hey Little Edwards," I heard a familiar voice call. I looked up to see Peter ready to take our order. Eli was giving me a weird look.

"Oh Hi Peter," I greeted politely. "How have you been?"

"Good, thanks. If you get a chance tell Darc I say hi." His eyes gleamed when he said my older sister's name.

"Will do," I said with a smile. Peter smiled back and proceeded to take our orders. When he left, Eli asked the question he'd been dying to ask.

"Who was that?" He asked.

"Peter Stone. He graduated in the spring. He's Darcy's ex-boyfriend."

"Oh," Eli said as he turned to look at him. Peter was fighting with Drew.

"You need to order something!" Peter yelled.

"I'm not hungry," Drew said icily.

"Then you need to leave!"

"No! This is a free country! I can do whatever I want!" Drew yelled back.

"No! You can't!" Peter was getting frustrated.

"Fine! I'll have a glass of water," Drew said reluctantly.

"One water coming up," Peter said as he slowly walked to get a glass. He simply poured a Poland Spring into the glass, added ice, and gave it to Drew.

"Thank you," Drew said taking a very small sip.

"Okay, you and Adam are right. Drew is definitely acting weird," Eli said turning back to look at me.

A few minutes later, Peter brought us our food: A burger and fries for Eli and a salad for me. We began to eat and mindlessly chat. I was so happy I had Eli. Without him, I'd be a mess. I needed him. We balance each other out perfectly. We were discussing what classic movie to see on Friday, when I saw Drew was gone, his almost full water still on the counter. I figured I'd tell Adam when I got home.

"I'll be right back. I'm going to the lady's room," I said as I got up. I walked over to the lady's room still looking at Eli. He was so perfect and he was all mine.

I wasn't looking where I was going so I bumped right into Drew. When I slammed into him, he dropped the jacket he had been carrying.

"I'm so sorry!" Drew and I said at the same time. He quickly bent down to pick up his jacket and a wet razor, which he shoved into his jacket pocket.

"What is that?" I said pointing at the razor. Drew noticeably tensed. What could Drew need a razor for? My thoughts flashed to my sister Darcy. She had cut herself with a razor a few years ago. It sent her to the hospital.

"Nothing," he said trying to get away but I blocked his only exit.

"Drew, were you cutting yourself!" I looked at his wrists, but they were uncut.

"Could you keep it down," Drew said in a menacing voice, but it cracked at the end. He cleared his throat. For the first time I noticed his eyes were red, from crying. He moved his arm and I saw the cuts.

"Drew!" I whisper as I grabbed his arm. He didn't pull away. I was shocked when I lifted up the sleeve to see three cuts. Two of them looked fresh. "You are cutting yourself! Drew I have to tell Adam." When I said this, his face crumpled.

"Clare. Clare, please." I had never heard him sound so small. "Please don't tell Adam. I'll stop, just please don't tell Adam." He seemed so scared. He looked at me with his sad eyes. They reminded me of Adam's when I found him burning himself.

"Why not? He would understand," I pleaded.

"Please Clare," he said as tears began to form in his eyes. I'd never seen Drew like this and it scared me.

"Fine. I-I promise I won't tell Adam," I said. I didn't want to see Drew cry. It made me feel bad for him. He actually had a heart.

"Thank you so much," he said as he hugged me. I hugged him back because he seemed like he needed it.

"Just promise me you'll make it home okay. Maybe Eli and I should drive you home…" I didn't want Drew to hurt himself again.

"No! Enjoy your date." He smiled the Drew smile that Alli used to drool over, but it seemed forced. "I'll have Adam call you when I get home." With that he smiled again and left. I watched as he walked out the door and down the street, towards his house. I totally forgot about going to the bathroom. I walked right back to Eli in a daze.

"Hey what took so long?" he said with mock offence. He saw me and his expression immediately changed. "Are you okay?" He said getting out of his seat.

"Yeah. Fine," I said with a convincing smile. The rest of our date when along as planned.

When I got home, I got a call from Adam.

"Hey Adam," I said. I felt so bad about keeping Drew's secret from him, but I couldn't tell him.

"Hey Clare. Drew said he saw you at the Dot and you told him to have me call you."

"Oh, yeah. I just wanted to say Drew didn't eat anything at the Dot. He had about one sip of water. Don't tell him I told you though." I wished I could tell him about Drew's cutting.

"Oh. Thanks for telling me. My mom doesn't believe me that there is something wrong with Drew."

"Oh sorry Adam. I have to go." I quickly hung up. I couldn't talk to Adam about just how bad Drew was. I just hoped he'd stick to his word and stop or I'd really have to tell Adam.

I was so stressed I decided to just go to sleep.

Drew's POV

When I got home from The Dot, I went straight to my room. I looked in the mirror. _Useless. Screw Up. Stupid. Worthless. Dumb. Hated._ These are all the things I thought of when I saw myself. I stared at myself for a few more seconds before I got disgusted and looked away. I disgusted myself. I was a disgrace. I mess up everything in my life. I always have.

I've been wondering about my eating habits lately. I mean, I know plenty about eating disorders, but they're for girls. I don't starve myself because I think I'm fat. I wish that's all I thought about myself. I don't eat because I don't deserve to. Because I don't deserve to live.


	3. Chapter 3

Adam's POV

Drew was starting to worry me. It's been weeks since Alli left and he was still off. It was much less noticeable now, but his eyes were empty and he never smiled. He also looked… fragile. As I got changed in the bathroom, I heard approaching footsteps.

"Adam, get out of the bathroom." Drew's voice sounded weaker than usual. He hardly banged on the door, too. He was usually livid and banged on the door like a gorilla because he needed enough time to do his hair.

"Okay," I said cautiously. I opened the door and I couldn't help but gawk at my older step brother. Drew, usually dressed in fitted preppy clothes, stood in front of me in his normal shoes and jeans, but instead of his usual flannel or tee, he wore a baggy sweatshirt. It was the really warm Michigan State one he usually only wore when he was sick.

"You can pick your jaw up off the floor any day now," he said listlessly as he walked past me into the bathroom.

"What are you wearing?" I sputtered. I looked closely at him and he was unusually pale.

"Clothes, Adam." He put gel into his hand as he prepared to do his hair. I noticed his hands shook slightly and his nails seemed brittle.

"Andrew, why are you wearing that sweatshirt? You look sick." He did look sick! He had dark circles under his eyes for Christ's sake! I watched him as he gelled his hair. Whenever he ran his hands through his hair, it seemed to break. His hair was as brittle as his nails.

"Because it's cold as hell in this house, _mom_," he retorted. "And I'm not sick, I'm fine." He sounded offended. He finished his hair and walked down stairs. I shook my head and followed him.

When we got downstairs, Mom gave us breakfast. I grabbed a power bar and juice while Drew drank half a glass of water. I looked at him suspiciously, but he didn't seem to notice. I was about to say something to him when our Mom called us to get in the car. Drew grabbed his stuff and got in. I grabbed another power bar and trailed behind him.

"Andrew," I said as I got in the car. "You skipped breakfast." I glared at him.

"Not really hungry," he said calmly.

"Mom!" I yelled. She shot me an annoyed look.

"Yes Adam," she replied in a bored tone.

"Drew didn't eat. You always made us eat before we leave." Drew stared out the window as I talked. We passed Alli's house and I saw his face spasm in pain. I figured he still wasn't over her.

"Drew, you need to eat something." Mom said with authority ringing in her voice.

He snapped out of his trance and replied. "Okay, but I don't have any food."

"Take this," I said handing him the power bar.

He took it and ate it in three bites. I was satisfied. As we pulled up to Degrassi, I saw Eli's hearse. I got out of the car and ran over to Clare and Eli.

"Hey guys," I said as I approached. Eli nodded his head and Clare waved. We began to walk to the steps and Drew passed us. His eyes had the same vacant look that was becoming the norm for him these days.

"Andrew!" I said. He looked at me and merely raised his hand in acknowledgment. Then he walked into Degrassi and took off down the hall.

"What's wrong with him?" Eli said. "He looks like hell."

I grimaced. So I wasn't the only one who noticed. "Yeah, he's been off lately."

Eli shrugged and Clare stayed uncharacteristically silent. Maybe Drew wasn't the only one acting weird.

Drew's POV 

This morning was brutal. Adam wouldn't get off my back. In the car he had forced me to eat breakfast. Why does he care what I eat? Then when I was walking into Degrassi, Adam stopped me for no reason. He was hanging out with his friends Eli and Clare. Clare gave me a concerned look but I ignored it. I hated pity.

As soon as I walked into Degrassi, I went to my locker. I knew sooner or later Adam would come to find me and this would be the first place he looked. It was too early to go to class so the only place I could think was the bathroom. When I got there it was empty, luckily. I was feeling sick from the protein bar I was forced to eat, so I decided it would be no big deal if I threw it up. I walked into one of the stall and was in the process of up heaving my breakfast when I heard someone walk in. I finished up and wiped my mouth. I went to wash out my mouth, and my hands, when I heard a voice.

"Are you okay? Maybe you should see the nurse." It was Sav. His concerned tone startled me. I'm sure he wasn't my biggest fan, after what happened with Alli. I cringed internally when I thought her name.

"Uh yeah," I laughed half heartedly. "You're probably right. I guess tomorrow morning I shouldn't have Adam make my breakfast."

"Yeah," Sav said laughing. He turned to leave when I stopped him.

"Um… Sav. Could you pass along a message for me?" I wanted to kick myself for saying that but it was too late now.

"Sure." He said. He seemed very unsure, ironically.

"Tell your sister I'm sorry." I looked down. "And that I hope she's doing well."

Sav looked confused but he nodded. "Okay. I'll pass it on." Save gave me a smile smile before walking out. I took one more look in the mirror before I went off to class.

While rushing through the hall, I ran into Zane Park. Surprisingly, he knocked me over. I fell to the ground and I felt an awful pain in all my joints. I grimaced.

"Oh my god. Drew, are you alright?" Zane looked mortified.

"Yeah, yeah. Just sore for yesterday's work out." I lied, quickly picking up my stuff. "See you around," I said as I rushed down the hall leaving a disoriented Zane in my wake.

Zane's POV

When I saw Drew in the hall, I was shocked. The usually unflappable, cocky Grade 11 was so… small. I ran into him and he completely collapsed to the floor. I looked down and his eyes were vacant with dark circles under them. He wore a baggy sweatshirt and seemed to tremble a little.

"Oh my god. Drew, are you alright?" I asked. I was mortified. He looked so weak as he cringed in pain on the floor. He touched his joints and grimaced.

"Yeah, yeah. Just sore for yesterday's work out." His voice was hoarse. He stood up but I was afraid he would just fall back down. He mumbled a goodbye and sped walked away. Something was up with that kid and I needed to find out what.


	4. Chapter 4

Drew's POV

I was looking forward to football practice all day until I found out all we'd be doing was working out. Most of the guys worked out in tanks tops, but I stayed in a tee shirt. I'd been keeping my cuts more covered, afraid that someone else would see them. Bumping into Clare last night was the worst thing that could've happened. She was friends with Adam but she had told me she wouldn't tell him if I stopped. So far she hasn't told him so I assume she is unaware that I haven't stopped.

When I got into the weight room, I saw Coach Armstrong by the scale. He took our weight once a month and sometimes surprised us and took down our height. His main reasoning was to make sure we were gaining more muscle.

"Torres, let me get your height and weight," he said as he saw me walk in.

"Sure thing, Coach" I said jogging over to him.

I stood as he got my height. I'm pretty sure I didn't grow much since the summer but for whatever reason he wanted to take my height.

"Wow. 5'11, that's two inches taller than last time," he said as he scribbled it down on his clip board. "Not bad. Now your weight."

I stepped onto the scale. I was really happy. I had been the shortest guy on the team. K.C towered over me and even Zane was taller than me. Now I was sure, I was at least Zane's height. I tried to remember if I was taller than him when I ran into him this morning. I think I was. This boosted my ego a lot.

"Drew. You're 140 pounds," Coach said in an unbelieving voice.

"What?" I yelled. K.C was standing next to Coach and even he looked shocked.

"Maybe the scale is off. K.C, let's see your weight." I got off as K.C stepped on. 140 pounds is crazy. I mean I hadn't really been eating in since the Vegas Dance, but I'm pretty sure I ate regularly for the few days Alli and I were back together. Either way, it's not possible that I had lost 12 pounds, is it?

"The scale is correct," Coach Armstrong said. "K.C you weigh 195, just like last month. Drew, get on again."

I got back on and stood there nervously. I couldn't be 140 pounds. It's impossible.

"Drew you're still 140. Have you had any changes in your diet?"

"No Coach," I said trying to sound convincing.

"Oh. Well, go home and eat some steak," he said with a laugh. I laughed too and got off the scale. I went to go get a drink and K.C followed me.

"Drew, wait up," he said trying to catch up to me.

"Yeah man?" I said as I unscrewed my water bottle and took a sip.

"You weren't in lunch today. Or yesterday. Or any day this month. And now you're 12 pounds lighter. Drew, are you not eating?"

"Are you kidding?" I said with a laugh. "I've just been busy. Who cares if I skip lunch every once in a while?"

"Okay. Yeah. I feel silly now," he said.

"No worries man. It's cool." I started to walk back in with K.C on my heels.

"Guthrie! Torres! Why don't you get on the bikes with Riley? I'm thinking 4 miles today," said Coach. "I'll be back in 20 minutes." He left to go to his office.

K.C, Riley, and I all started to pedal. After about 5 minutes my vision started to blur but I ignored it. At 2 miles I suddenly needed to throw up. I got up and ran to the garbage. I threw up blood. I looked up and K.C, Riley, and Zane were staring at me. I took a drink of water and went back to my bike.

"Drew. You okay?" Riley asked.

"Yeah. Fine," I said giving K.C a look so he wouldn't say anything. I actually felt really nauseous. I got back on the bike and was in the middle of my third mile when my vision blurred and then blacked out. That last thing I heard was K.C's voice.

"Get Coach, Now!"

K.C's POV

"Get Coach, Now!" I yelled. One second Drew was on his bike doing his third mile, the next he's on the floor, passed out. Riley sprinted out of the room and came back in with a confused Coach Armstrong.

"What happened?" Coach asked me.

"He was on his bike and he just passed out." I wasn't sure what to say.

"He also threw up blood at his second mile," inserted Zane.

"What should we do?" asked Riley. He hated when he didn't know what to do.

"Get the nurse!" Coach yelled. Riley took off down the hall. Owen came forward for the first time.

"Coach, should someone call Drew's family? Maybe his mom or brother?" I was shocked. Owen wasn't Drew's biggest fan to say the least. He hazed him, hurt his brother, beat him up, and tried to sleep with his girlfriend. Owen actually helping Drew was the craziest thing I've ever heard.

"Good idea, Owen." Coach was trying to get Drew to wake up. "K.C, you've got Adam Torres's number, right?"

"Well, no but I'll be able to get a hold of him." I said as I already started to call Clare. I walked out of the weight room so I could talk to Clare privately.

"K.C?" she answered.

"Hey Clare. Listen, I need to speak to Adam," I said hesitantly. Drew being out cold was scaring the hell out of me.

"Adam? Why?" she said calmly.

"It's about Drew." I was going to go on but I didn't know if Drew would want more people than necessary to know so I left it at that.

"Oh my god," she whispered. I could tell she was worried right away. It sounded like she knew something I didn't. "Adam's right here. Should he go to the school?" She sounded panicked now.

"Yes! I'll be waiting outside!" I hung up and started walking towards the entrance of the school.

Clare's POV

When I heard something was wrong with Drew, I was scared to death. I knew about his cutting and a million possibilities swirled in my head as Eli, Adam, and I drove to the school. What if Drew was bleeding to death and it was all my fault? Even worse, what if he had tried to kill himself? Adam's voice brought me out of my little trance.

"How worried did K.C sound on the phone?" Adam was so worried. He couldn't keep still.

"Pretty worried," I said honestly. I didn't want to scare him but he deserved to know. "Actually, he sounded scared to death."

"I told you guys something was wrong with him!" Adam yelled. "Why wouldn't my mom just listen to me! He could be dying right now!" Adam was close to a break down.

"Adam, way to be a pessimist," Eli said. "Maybe it's not that serious. He's at football practice. Maybe he broke a bone or something."

Adam and I contemplated this as we pulled in front of the school. K.C was waiting, like he's said, on the front steps. Adam, Eli, and I got out of the car. Adam bolted to K.C as Eli and I followed.

"What happened?" Adam said eagerly.


	5. Chapter 5

Adam's POV

"What happened?" I said as soon as K.C was in an earshot.

"Drew's hurt," he said soberly. "He was on the bike and he just passed out. It's been about 10 minutes and he's still not waking up."

I wasn't shocked. I knew something was wrong with Drew but I was so worried. Eli was wrong. This was serious. If it was me that was hurt, Drew would have been going crazy.

"Can we see him?" I asked. I needed to know if he was okay.

"Sure," K.C said in a daze. K.C was Drew's best friend. I could understand why he was worried.

When I saw everyone in the weight room, my heart dropped. It had to be serious. No one was saying a word, not even Owen. I saw Coach on the ground over a body I assumed to be Drew's. He looked grave. I cleared my throat and the entire team turned to look at K.C, Clare, Eli and I. They whispered among themselves for a second before Coach Armstrong got up and walked over to us.

"Adam Torres?" he said in a serious tone. I nodded. He continued. "Adam, we called the ambulance. It's been 15 minutes and we can't get him to wake up. Do you have any idea why he would've passed out?"

"Well, I noticed he hasn't been eating," I said quietly. I felt like such a terrible brother. I knew there was something wrong with Drew but I hadn't done anything about it. He could be dying for all I know and I'd be my fault.

"So stupid," Coach muttered much to my shock. He clenched his hands before bringing them up to rub his temples. I felt even worse than before.

"I know. I'm so stupid. I'm sorry," I said hanging my head down. I felt ashamed to be a brother. After all Drew's done for me…

"Not you!" he replied looking appalled. "Me."

"You?" I said confused. What could he have done?

"I weighed Drew in the beginning of practice. He lost 12 pounds. I was suspicious but I didn't think much of it, until now."

I had nothing to say. Twelve pounds! That's crazy! I looked over at Drew. He looked so small, so weak. I've never seen him like this. Not even when we were little kids. I wanted to cry. If only I'd opened my eyes and notices how much smaller he was getting. He looked so innocent as he laid on the floor. Nothing like he usually looked.

The paramedics barged in and I saw them with all these machines. I could no longer see Drew. All I heard was a jumble of words_. Unconcious. Shallow breathing. Dehydration. _

"He's stopped breathing. Someone, get the oxygen mask!" one of the paramedics yelled. As soon as I digested this, I felt my legs give out. Last thing I remember is Clare grabbing my hand.

Clare's POV

I grabbed Adam's hand as he fainted. I felt so guilty. Maybe if I had told Adam last night, Drew would be okay.

"Eli," I said motioning to Adam. I had him in my arms. I caught his fall but he was heavy. Eli looked panicked.

"Paramedic," he yelled as he took Adam from me. The paramedics took him and they loaded Drew and Adam into the ambulance outside. I watched them drive away then looked around. Everyone was silent.

"Eli, let's go to the hospital." I said. We got into the car. As we sped down the road I pulled out my phone and made a very important call.

"Hi Alli…"


	6. Chapter 6

K.C's POV

We have been in the hospital lobby for almost 2 hours and we still haven't heard any news. I had my mom drive me over as soon as the ambulance left. I never thought I'd be in a hospital sitting next to Eli and Clare, but here I am. Adam is busy pacing the floor. It's so quiet. No one has said a word since we got here. Mr. and Mrs. Torres came shortly after I did. They stayed in the far corner of the lobby.

"This is endless!" I yelled, earning a few looks from strangers.

"K.C, sit down!" Eli hissed.

"No," I said more quietly. "I know you're not really Drew's friend but I'm his best friend! I need to know something, anything!"

Just as Eli was about to respond, a doctor came out and began to talk to Mr. and Mrs. Torres. Adam soon joined too. I watched on the edge of my seat until the doctor walked away. Their faces were blank. I couldn't take it anymore. I ran over to Adam to ask what the news was.

"Adam, what'd the doctor say?"

"He said that Drew had many of the signs of starvation: brittle nails and hair, low blood pressure, throwing up blood, low cold tolerance, and general weakness."

"Starvation? Like an eating disorder?" I said. By this time Clare and Eli were listening.

"An eating disorder?" Eli said.

"No. They said it's not an eating disorder. He's just been starving himself. I personally don't see the difference!" Adam said in a tired voice.

"What else did they say?" Clare said, speaking up for the first time.

"That we can visit him now," Adam said. Just as he did, a familiar figure walked into the lobby.

"Alli!" Clare exclaimed as she ran over to her. They hugged and I saw Sav come in behind her and leaned against the wall, still in hearing range.

"What are you doing here?" Adam asked as Clare and Alli walked to our group.

"Clare called me and told me Drew was in the hospital. What's wrong with him?" She sounded a little concerned.

Adam repeated what he'd said and Alli looked so shocked.

"He's starving himself?" She screeched.

"Yeah. Because of you!" Mrs. Torres said coming up behind us.

"Mom!" Adam yelled.

"It's true," Mrs. Torres said glaring at Alli. Mr. Torres gave everyone a sympathetic look and led Mrs. Torres away.

"Who's going to visit Drew first?" I finally said, breaking the awkwardness.

"Can I?" Alli asked. When we looked unconvinced, she elaborated. "I really need to talk to him."

"Fine," Adam agreed. She thanked him and ran through the doors.

Sav's POV

I was at the hospital with Alli and I couldn't have felt worse. I saw Drew this morning throwing up and now he was in the hospital for starvation. I'm so stupid. I should have told someone, done something. Maybe then Drew would be okay and I wouldn't feel so terrible.

Drew's POV

I lied in my hospital bed with all types of tubes connected to me. I had an IV and a bag with some kind of fluid. The rest of the wires and machines were hopelessly confusing to me. I had no idea why I was here. I heard the doctor say something about starvation. Now everyone would think I'm weak. _Come on, Drew! You're a guy! Can't you take one little break up? You're such a wimp! _

I was so frustrated with myself I looked to grab a razor or knife. I needed to cut. I couldn't find anything so I dug my nails into my arm. When my arm started to bleed, I stopped. I'm so stupid! As if the doctors needed another reason to worry about me. I slammed my head down on my pillow. I laid there for a while and then a nurse came in.

"You have a visitor, Mr. Torres. Do you want me to let them in?"

I nodded yes. I wondered who it was. K.C? Adam? Mom and Dad? I heard the door open and someone walk in. They were wearing heels. I turned and saw her.

"Alli!" I yelled. I sat up quickly but the IV caused me pain. I winced and slid back down.

"Hi Drew," she said quietly.

"Alli, what are you doing here?" I said in disbelief.

"We need to talk," she said soberly. I waited for her to continue. "Drew, why are you starving yourself?" I had no answer. Or at least, I couldn't tell Alli my reasons.

"Is it because of me?" She sounded on the verge of tears. My vision blurred with tears.

"Drew," she came over to me and sat on the edge of my bed. She rubbed my arm, trying to comfort me. We stayed like that for a while. I finally stopped crying.

"Alli. I miss you. I-I love you." She gave me a sad look.

"I love you too, Drew. But that doesn't change anything."

"Alli, I'm so sorry. Please. Please forgive me," I begged. I needed her. I needed to get better. I suppressed tears. _God, I'm such a girl!_

"I forgive you Drew. But I can't trust you. We can't be together." She started to cry.

"Don't cry," I cooed as I gave her a hug. I put on a happier face. I wiped my tears and smiled. "I understand. You don't need to be upset. I'm a big boy. I can take care of myself." I tried to force a laugh.

"Please stop starving yourself, okay?" she asked. I nodded but I had no intention of stopping. "Bye Drew," she said as she leaned down and kissed my cheek. Then she walked out. I let the girl I loved walk out. She would never come back.

I whispered, mostly to myself. "Bye Alli."

Adam's POV

Alli came out with a few tears in her eyes. Other than that she looked okay.

"So, did you talk everything out?" Clare asked.

"Yeah. Everything is good. We're both fine now." She smiled. She hugged us all and said goodbye. Then her and Sav left.

"Let's go visit him," K.C suggested. We all decided to go together. When we walked in, we saw Drew. His eyes were red and his face was covered in drying tears.

"Andrew," I said going up to him. "Is everything okay?"

He gave me a look. I realized it was a stupid question.

"Andrew, why?" I said. Why would he starve himself? What's wrong with his life?

"Because I don't deserve to eat." His voice was so sure, so sincere. I was speechless. He spoke his words like they were truth. Behind me, Clare started to cry.

"Don't ever say that," I growled.

"It's true," he said in the same tone. "I'm a screw up, Adam. I'm useless. I don't deserve to be happy. I don't even deserve to live." He no longer cried, which scared me more. He seemed so in control. The last words he said rang in my head. _I don't even deserve to live. _


	7. Chapter 7

Clare's POV

Drew got released from the hospital two days ago. I went over to see him yesterday. He was cheerful around his parents and Adam, but when they went away I saw the pain in his eyes. I still hadn't told Adam about Drew's cutting. I think he's stopped. I really hope so. While Drew was in the hospital, I hardly slept. I would stay awake all night worrying about him. When he told Adam he didn't deserve to live, I cried. I honestly had no idea he thought that.

Right now I was sitting in homeroom, my only class with Drew. Only, he still hasn't come back to school. Last time I saw him he still looked sick. On top of that, his parents don't want people to know why he was in the hospital. Principal Simpson and Coach Armstrong know but everyone else thinks it was because he was dehydrated. I guess that's close enough to the truth. Mrs. Torres apparently finds shame in the fact her son was starving himself. She infuriates me so much! First with Adam, and now with Drew. Instead of worrying about her son's well being, she's worrying about her reputation! Adam hasn't told her what Drew said in the hospital, but I'm convinced she wouldn't bat an eye. As long as her reputation was in tack….

Right before the bell rang I saw a familiar figure walk through the door. Drew. He was wearing his normal attire: jeans, sneakers, and a fitted tee. He wore a neutral expression. He seemed to be much better. I smiled. It looked like he was back to normal.

"Hey Drew," I said as he walked towards me. We've become friends since I saw him at the Dot. Our friendship grew when I visited in the hospital everyday for his week and a half long stay.

"Hey Clare," he said flashing me his crest white strips smile. It seemed to be genuine.

"You're looking better." I cautiously appraised him for any cuts on the forearm.

"If you're looking for any cuts, you're not gonna find them," he whispered. I'd thought I'd offended him but he smiled.

"Just making sure," I said as a bunch of girls came our way.

"Oh my gosh, Drew! We're so glad you're back! We were so worried about you!" A random blonde girl said as she put her hand on his arm. She didn't realize what scars might be there.

"Yep, good as new. I'm not gonna let a little case of dehydration slow me down." As he said this, he winked at me. The girls were too busy drooling over him to notice. I mean, of course Drew was gorgeous, but it was so undignified to gawk that much. The guy was only human.

The girls continued to blab about random things and Drew seemed to be holding up on his own so I let my thoughts drifted to Eli. _Eli, my amazing boyfriend._ I wondered if Eli and I will get a chance to study French this afternoon.

Drew's POV

I walked back into Degrassi with a mission. Act normal at all costs! I didn't need my friends constantly monitoring me. As I tried to make my way to my locker, a million girls came up to me to tell me how much they missed me, that they were so worried, and all that. I basically tuned them out, throwing in an occasional smile. These girls were so easy.

I was excited to see Clare in homeroom. She was starting to become a really good friend to me. I mean, she'd kept me from dying of boredom during my hospital stay. I walked in and immediately saw her. I walked her way hoping no one else would come up to me to ask me how I was.

"Hey Drew," she said as I got nearer. She smiled at me but I could tell she was worried. I needed to put on a good act if I was going to fool Clare.

"Hey Clare," I said flashing her, what I hoped to be, an authentic smile. _Be yourself, or rather, who you used to be._ I just kept repeating that in my head.

"You're looking better." Clare not so slyly scanned my arm. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. Typical Clare, always worrying.

"If you're looking for any cuts, you're not gonna find them," I teased in a low voice. I didn't exactly want anyone knowing our little secret.

"Just making sure," she said looking over my shoulder. I turned around and saw a bunch of girls. Great.

"Oh my gosh, Drew! We're so glad you're back! We were so worried about you!" An annoying blonde squealed. How could I ever have found girls like that attractive?

"Yep, good as new. I'm not gonna let a little case of dehydration slow me down," I said, attempting to be flirtatious. I needed to be Drew, the jock, right now. The one who cared about superficial stuff and girls like this.

The girls went into a long recount on how Coach told them about me at Power Squad practice and how everyone was really worried. They also told me it was on the Anti-Grapevine, the gossip blog of Degrassi. Now everyone in the whole school knew, assuming they hadn't known before. The bell for first period rang and I bolted for the door, more than ready to be rid of the girls. _God Drew, what's wrong with you?_

K.C's POV

As soon as I saw Drew walk into the cafeteria, I pounced. He looked normal, but I wasn't going to be fooled. If he even tried to weasel himself out of eating, I'd tackle him. Since I was one of the only people who knew about Drew's… err… disorder, I'd have to be careful. If anyone knew Drew, the popular jock, had been starving himself, he'd never live it down.

"Hey man," I said casually. "What's for lunch?" He gave me a knowing look. Busted.

"If you must know," he said theatrically rolling his eyes, "two turkey and cheese sandwiches, chocolate milk, and a brownie." He pointed to the brown bag in his hand. I was ashamed. I shouldn't have doubted him.

"Wow. Hungry from all those days of not eating?" I joked. Drew shot me a look and I stopped. I was just trying to lighten the mood.

We got to the table and everyone began to chatter. Most of the conversation revolved around football. I saw Drew try to get into it, but he seemed a little spacey. He quickly inhaled his lunch. I've never seen someone eat so fast. He then threw away his lunch and went to leave.

"Where are you going?" I asked trying not to sound accusatory.

"Gotta finish some homework before next period," he said. Great, it's the guys first day back after being in the hospital and I've already over reacted twice.

"Oh okay. Catch you later." Drew replied with a nod and walked out the cafeteria doors. I should have more trust in him.

Drew's POV

I walked out the lunch room and sighed. K.C had been grilling me all lunch. He didn't trust me, but he had good reason not to. After stuffing myself with food, I felt sick. I told myself I was just going to take a walk, but I knew what I was really going to do. After dismissing K.C, I walked into the nearest bathroom. I checked very carefully to make sure no one was around. Luckily, this bathroom was hardly used so I'd be safe. I walked into the stall and purged my lunch. It was only my second time ever doing that. It felt odd to me but it got the job done. I began to wash out my mouth. I'd have to start carrying breath mints with me if this was going to be a habit.


	8. Chapter 8

Adam's POV

Like the rest of his friends, I watched Drew like a hawk. I constantly asked him if he'd had anything to eat. He got annoyed but I knew it was necessary. I was scared to death since Drew told me he didn't deserve to live. I considered telling Mom and Dad but Clare and I decided against it. When I suggested Drew go to therapy, my mother shot it down before the words even left my mouth. My mom and dad would "never be embarrassed like that" or whatever other nonsense. My new girlfriend, Fiona went to a therapist and her parents were 100% supportive, even with the media monitoring their every move.

Things with Fiona had been slow going but are great now. With Drew's issues, it was hard for me to focus on Fi, but we were now happily dating. I spend most of my free time with her at her condo. It doesn't seem fair to act all lovey dovey at my house with a love sick Drew there. Nevertheless, I still managed to keep an eye on Drew's condition. I don't need to spend every moment with him, he can take care of himself.

As the weeks pasted, Drew seemed to be more and more himself. He had the annoying habit of constantly chewing gum, but I figured it was a nervous habit. I didn't call him out on it even if it annoyed the hell out of me. I was all for the gum chewing if it kept Drew alive and healthy.

One of the most concerning things pertaining to Drew right now, was Alli. She's been calling a lot to check up on him. I hated to see his face light up every time she called. He assured her he was doing fine and everything was great, but I could see the pain in his eyes. Especially when Alli talked about her new school and the new guys she was meeting. The other day she asked Drew for dating advice since she's apparently seeing this new guy, Nick. I thought it was cruel, but Drew said that was what "friends" asked other "friends". He told me over and over that he was over her, but it was obvious he wasn't. Even Alli knew he still loved her. That's why I hated her so much. She knew how Drew felt and she knew what he was going through, but she insisted on stabbing him in the heart and twisting the knife. All I could do was sit and watch.

Zane's POV

After school, I was in the weight room with Riley. We had been spotting each other when I heard voices coming from Coach Armstrong's office. Riley said he was going to the vending machine to buy a water bottle. While he was gone, I decided to listen to the voices. I knew it was wrong to eavesdrop, but I couldn't help it. They were speaking quite loudly.

"Drew," I heard Coach say, "This is a serious matter. People are monitoring you as well as they can, but you have to work with us." I figured he was talking about Drew's case of dehydration.

"I know, sir. But I would rather keep it private. If you're constantly making me eat, they're gonna know something is up," Drew replied politely. Eating? What does that have to do with anything?

"Starvation is serious, Drew," Coach said, his voice growing louder. "We need to make sure you don't stop eating again. Just one slip up could mess up your whole recovery. You don't want another repeat of last week, do you?" Wait, Drew was starving himself?

"You make it seem like I have an eating disorder. I stopped eating for a few weeks, so what? I don't have an eating disorder." Drew's voice rose. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. It finally made sense though. When I saw Drew in the hall the day he passed out, he'd looked very sick and weak. I finally knew why. It was because he had been starving himself.

"This conversation is over. You're going to eat during practice or you're not going to be on the team anymore. We have a strict policy here at Degrassi. Either you eat, or you quit the team." I heard footsteps and a door slam. I ran and hid behind a weight machine, afraid of getting caught. I saw Drew walk out into the hall and punch a locker. I saw tears pour down his face before he slumped to the ground. I felt so bad for the kid. I wondered what he was going through.

Drew's POV

I was getting tired of acting normal. I didn't want to. I had no effort left to pretend. I continued to go through the motions though: being a jock, flirting with girl (halfheartedly), and the usual Drew stuff. I also ate with the football jocks. We made conversation, but no one other than K.C seemed to notice my indifference. K.C still stalked my food intake, but I'd gotten used to it. I read on the internet that chewing gum and drinking water curved your appetite. Now, I'm constantly chewing a piece of gum and I carry around a water bottle. It also helps that my friends seem to think that I'm normal because I'm drinking and stuff. Little do they know it's one of my many ways of hiding my issues.

I can hide my eating habits pretty well. After the first week, it was almost natural for me. I pretend to eat breakfast with Adam every morning. He has cereal and I have a power bar and juice. When Adam leaves, I put the power bar back in the box. No one ever notices. Lunch is a bit trickier because K.C can be very observant. To keep him in the dark, I eat lightly some days. I'll drink water and eat an apple or crackers. The other days I'll stuff myself, and ask to go to the bathroom in my next class. I make sure to have mints and mouth wash with me. Teachers can be very unobservant sometimes. For dinner, I usually say I already ate and head up to my room to do homework. Sometimes mom and dad force me to eat with the family. That really sucks because, even though I do it, I hate throwing up my food. I'd much rather just starve all the time. But with starvation comes side effects.

I've learned about all the side effects of starvation and purging and have thought up solutions. To make my hair and nails stronger, I used hair strengthening shampoo and I use green tea gloss on my nails to make them harder. Those are easy, but there are others that are harder to hide, like broken blood vessels in the eyes. That rarely happens but when it does, I blame football. To go along with that, bruising easily is also hard to cover. I blame football for that too. When football is over, I'll blame basketball. I also get super dizzy. That I don't really have to hide, just endure. Another symptom I can't cover up is a hoarse voice. I drink a lot of tea (at night in my room) and carry cough drops, but it doesn't entirely help. In the beginning people noticed the difference in my voice, but after a while they got used to it.

Since I can't cut anymore, I've been keeping a notebook. It sound super girly, but it's not like that. It's a normal spiral notebook. It's not much different than all my other notebooks. Except that there are self deprecating, hateful words covering most of the pages. You can tell when I'm really frustrated because the pen digs deep into the paper, sometimes tearing through. Writing in a notebook doesn't release all my frustration, so I am constantly at the gym or running around town. This is also a good excuse to skip dinner. Well for right now, I've got everything under control.


	9. Chapter 9

Adam's POV

I was sitting in Fiona's apartment with her. She was making us sandwiches and I was watching her. She looked so beautiful. I can't believe the most amazing girl in school, The Princess, is dating me. I must be the luckiest guy on earth. All of a sudden my phone rang. I looked down and my phone and I saw it was a text from Drew. It read:

Hey bro. When r u coming home?

I was thinking maybe we could do

something like watch a movie or go out?

I felt guilty. I had been hanging out with Fiona more and more. Drew and I used to hang out, but now I never seem to have the time. Since he rarely hangs out with his friends anymore, he always asks me if I want to do something. I really do want to be with Drew, but I also want to be with my girlfriend. I replied.

Sorry. I'm going to be

with Fi until like 10.

We're studying.

Drew quickly replied.

Oh okay. See you later

I could tell he was upset. I mean, I'm an awful brother for ditching all the time when he needs me most. It was evident Drew still wasn't fully recovered. He seemed a little better, but he always looked and sounded kind of sick. Most people didn't notice, but I did. Drew needed me and I was abandoning him. Even though I knew what I was doing was awful, I did it anyway. There was no way I was going to ditch Fiona. Wow, I'm such an awful brother.

"Everything alright? You seem upset," Fiona said as she came to stand in front of me. I guiltily toyed with my phone.

"Drew just texted me. He asked me to hang out, but I blew him off again. I just feel really bad," I said quietly.

"Don't feel bad, Adam."

"But I'm a terrible brother," I explained.

"You are not. Drew understands. I bet he doesn't mind. He'll probably go for a run or something." I knew she was trying to console me, but I was getting more upset.

"Fiona! He had an eating disorder. What if he goes back to starving himself? It'll be my fault." I was hysterical now.

"Adam, no it won't. Even if he did start to starve himself, I'm pretty sure you'd be able to tell. Also, it's not your job to look after him Adam."

"But he's so lonely. He comes home and just hangs around the house all night. Except for when he's running or working out. He barely even talks to anyone but K.C, Clare, and me. I shouldn't even be away from home. He's been alone every day this week!" I was running different mind scaring scenarios through my head.

"Adam. Calm down. Do you want to hang out at your house from now on?" I could tell she was running out of things to say. As much as I wanted to object, I held my tongue. She was just trying to help.

"Okay," I said slowly. "Do you want to go straight there after school? My parents won't be home."

"Of course," she said kissing my cheek. "Now let's eat!" She giggled as she pulled me to the table.

Drew's POV

I'm so bored. Adam is always busy with Fiona. I never leave the house, so Adam is really the only person I have the chance to chill with. Adam's tried to say home to keep me company, but he should just go out. I really would rather be alone than watch him cuddle and flirt with his girlfriend.

I'm not bitter. I mean, I wish I had a girlfriend, but I'm not jealous of Adam. I'd just rather he not shove it in my face. If I was always being cute with my girlfriend Adam would've gotten mad and yelled at me. I would never yell at Adam about that, but I'm getting annoyed.

The only person I really talk out of school is Alli. She calls me every day and we talk. Usually about school or friends. I try to make her believe I'm happy, because I don't want her to worry when there's nothing she can do to help me. I wish more than anything I could get her back. I still love her, but I messed everything up. Every day I wake up thinking she feels the same way but then I remember that day in the boiler room and my perfect life comes crashing down on me. I hate myself for what I did with Bianca. I hurt the only girl I'd ever loved, and in the end I hurt myself. Because life without Alli is slowly killing me. One day it finally will.

Dave's POV

I was sitting in media emersions when I saw him. Drew Torres. I did a double take when I saw him. He looked different then I'd ever seen him. I looked around to see if anyone else had spotted him. Everyone was watching Mrs. Oh's presentation so I was the only one. He looked really weird. Physically, he looked pretty normal, but his eyes looked dead and he walked as though he was in a lot of pain. I saw him walk into the bathroom and decided to follow.

"Mrs. Oh," I called out. "Can I go to the bathroom?" She rolled her eyes but agreed.

"Alright Dave, don't forget to take the pass." She held it out for me. I grabbed it and ran down the hall. I slowed when I got to the door. I opened it slowly and heard a weird sound.

It was the sound of someone crying. I tiptoed in and listened. Were Drew and I the only ones in here? It couldn't be. I would bet anyone a million dollars Drew Torres would sooner die then be crying in a school bathroom. I saw shoes shuffle and they were definitely Drew's. I heard the sound of someone texting on a phone. I was so confused. I walked out and sat in an alcove a few feet away from the bathroom. No one could see me so I'd be good here for a while. I needed to think. Was Drew crying in there? Yeah, he definitely was. But why? Girls were all over him, guys respected him, and everything seemed to be going great for him. He was the quarterback of our football team and I heard he's going out for basketball in the winter. He was like a god.

As I pondered this, I heard footsteps. They were light. Probably the footsteps of a girl. I couldn't see who it was but I knew her voice as soon as I heard it.

"Drew," she said knocking on the boy's bathroom door. It was Clare Edwards. She was a good girl: purity ring, amazing grades, and all around church girl. She used to date K.C and now she was with Eli. I had no idea what she could possibly be talking to Drew for? I heard the bathroom door swing open.

"Hi Clare," said a hoarse voice I assumed to be Drew's. "We need to talk."

"Okay," she said leading him to a bench 5 feet away from me. They still couldn't see me.

"Clare, I didn't want to talk to Adam because I didn't want to worry him but please don't tell anyone about this conversation, okay?" He sounded weird.

"I promise," she said honestly. Good old Clare.

"I went back," he said. Clare gasped. I was so confused. He went back to what?

"Drew! Don't do that to yourself. Please stop," Clare sounded desperate.

"Clare. I'm sorry. I can't help it. I keep thinking I'm worthless: completely unimportant. Then I- " Clare cut him off.

"Don't think that," she growled. "Not ever again, understand?" She sounded sickened.

"Okay, I will. Just help me, Clare. I need it."

"Okay."

Man, I'm so confused. I listened closely but I heard no voices, just the steady breathing of Clare and the ragged breaths from Drew.

"Let's walk," she said and with that the two of them walked away. Damn, I guess I'd never know what they were talking about.


	10. Chapter 10

K.C's POV

Drew was pretty much back to normal. I mean, he's very pensive, but he seemed to be fine. I shouldn't have been so annoying to him. I mean, I watched him like a hawk for weeks. It must suck for your friends not to trust you. I want to apologize to Drew today after school. I mean, I know how it feels to try to get your life back on track and Drew is doing a hell of a job; he deserves some credit. He was doing much better than I could have if I was him.

Alli's POV

I had a plan. It had taken me months to think up but I'm glad I'd taken the time. This plan was fool proof. Plus, Drew would never see it coming. I had to say, I was quite the genius. My plan was to take him back. After our break up he was a mess. He still is. I could tell he still loved me every time we talked on the phone. He sounded like I'd made his whole day whenever I called. I knew we would definitely get back together. After, I'd have us date for a few months. I'd let him grown attached to me, start to love me. Then, I'll begin to cheat on him. After weeks of cheating, I will set it up so that he will walk in on my cheating. It will smash his heart into a million pieces. He'll finally feel the pain I felt. I know its malicious but I don't care. All I care about is revenge.

I decided that today was the perfect day to put my plan into motion. I slowly dialed his house phone number, knowing his mother wouldn't be home until 5. It was only 3:30 now. The phone rang and Drew picked up.

"Hello," he said sounding tired.

"Hey Drew. It's Alli," I said trying to sound casual.

"Oh. Hey Alli. What's up?" he replied sounding happy. That made this so much easier.

"Can we talk?" I got straight to the point. I had the perfect plan. Now all I had to do was put it into action.

"We're talking right now," he joked. I rolled my eyes.

"Meet me at the Dot in 20 minutes." I tried to sound sassy, but I was nervous. What if he didn't take the bait?

"Sure. See you soon," he replied a little too quickly. I smiled. Maybe this would be easier than I thought.

"Perfect," I said trying to keep the smugness out of my voice. I smiled a devious smile and hung up. It was finally time for me to get my revenge on Drew Torres.

Drew's POV

Alli had asked me to meet her at the Dot. I had no idea what she could possibly want. She's made it clear that she's over me, that she's moved on. Maybe she just wanted to catch up as friends or whatever. She definitely wouldn't want to get back together. I mean, who would want to date someone like me: a worthless, stupid jock.

I walked into the Dot and saw her sitting at a table in the back. She looked so beautiful. The last time I'd actually scene her was at the hospital. Not exactly a time I wanted to remember. Seeing her here made a wave of emotion come crashing down on me. I needed to compose myself.

"Hey Drew," she said as I sat down. I tried not to smile so big but I couldn't help it. She made me so happy.

"Hey Alli. What's up?" She looked nervous. I frowned. Why was she so nervous?

"We need to talk." As soon as I heard the words, I froze. I couldn't move any muscles in my body. I became very nervous. She avoided my eyes. "Drew, I still have feelings for you." She took a deep breath and looked me in the eyes. I had no idea what she saw in them.

On the inside I was freaking out. I couldn't believe it! Alli still had feelings for me! The most beautiful, smart, sexy, sassy, kind girl in the whole world still had feelings for me! ME! The screw up, worthless, good for nothing Drew. I couldn't believe it.

"Drew?" she asked tentatively.

"Alli, are you sure?" I tried to make me voice normal but it came out as a small whisper.

"Yes, Drew. I still really like you." She smiled hesitantly. "Do you feel the same way?" I wanted to get up and scream it to everyone in the Dot, but I settled for using an inside voice.

"Yes, Alli I still really like you. But what about the guys you've been talking about?"

"They're not you, Drew. They don't mean anything to me." I couldn't believe what she was saying. This had to be some cruel joke.

"You really like me?" I said unsurely.

"Yes Drew! Why is it so hard to understand?" She looked worried.

"Because I'm worthless Alli. You could do so much better." I was playing with the salt shaker.

"You're not worthless. You're worth everything to me, Drew." I beamed. I slowly leaned in and closed my eyes. Soon her lips were on mine. I missed them so much! I was so happy I could cry. Alli was finally mine again. I pulled away so I could speak.

"Does this mean we're back together?" I asked, still unsure.

"Yes," she whispered as she leaned in to kiss me again. This was the best day of my life! I finally felt like I had a reason to be happy, a reason to live. We pulled away and I did something I hadn't done in months. I ordered a double hamburger with fries from the Dot, and I actually ate it.

Adam's POV

I was sitting in Fiona's condo with Eli and Clare. I was annoyed but I hadn't said a word yet. Drew came home an hour ago and he was so happy. It was a complete switch from the way he usually was. He had a goofy grin on and I swear he was even whistling. I can't believe he-

"Adam, you look like someone ran over your cat," Eli said breaking my train of thought. I glared at him but he continued smirking. Fiona on the other hand looked concerned.

"I'm just annoyed," I said darkly.

"What's wrong?" Fiona asked worriedly. I sighed.

"Drew and Alli got back together." When I said that Clare choked on the water she was drinking and it sprayed all over the table.

"What?" she yelled. Eli looked confused as did Fiona.

"Clare, what's the big deal?" Eli asked. Clare crossed her arms and huffed.

"Why didn't Alli tell me?" she muttered. "Adam, when did this happen?" she said directing her attention at me.

"This afternoon," I said.

"How did it happen?" Fiona asked. "It seemed unlikely that they would ever get back together."

"I know. Out of the blue Alli said she still has feelings for him. Drew's over the moon. He wouldn't shut up about it," I said rolling my eyes.

"That was random," Fiona noted.

"It's really not that big a deal," Eli said. "I don't understand why you two are so upset?"

"Because I hate her!" I said at the same time Clare said, "Because she's my best friend."

"Well it's happened. Nothing you two can do about it. Just accept it," Eli said. Clare and I glared at him.

"Who wants more pasta?" Fiona said breaking the tension. I smiled at my girlfriend and the rest of the evening went as planned.

K.C's POV

"So you two are back together?" I asked Drew. It was Monday morning and we were sitting on the bleachers waiting for gym to start. We were playing basketball this month and since basketball practice was every day after school, it would be like basketball 24/7.

"Yeah," he said beaming. It was awesome to have him back. Since Alli broke up with him, he'd been totally different, but now it seemed as if he was going back to normal.

"Well, I'm happy for you," I said with a smile. I really was. I hated to see Drew all upset.

"Thanks. So how are things with your mom?" My mom was out of jail and I had moved in with her. She really changed and got her life together.

"Great," I said. "She's even starting to learn how to cook." Drew laughed. He knew that a few weeks ago the only things my mom could make were Mac and Cheese and pasta.

"That's really awesome," Drew said sincerely. He really was a great best friend. I was really happy we'd become close. At the beginning of this year, I didn't really have too many friends. But Drew has been there for me since we met. He's even supportive of the baby situation.

"And how's Jenna and the baby?" he asked. Even though he couldn't relate at all, Drew was still super supportive.

"Good. She's due in later this month. I still can't believe I'm going to be a dad," I said in awe. I was so scared.

"Don't worry; you'll be a great dad." Drew smiled reassuringly. "And if you need someone to babysit the little monster, I'll be happy to help when I can." I smiled at Drew. He always knew what to say.

"Don't get a girl pregnant," I warned. "It just caused trouble." Drew smiled.

"Don't worry, it's not a problem."

"Of course it is," I said. "It can happen even if you use protection. So anyone who's having-" He cut me off.

"It's not a problem," he said quickly. I look at him for a second and it clicked.

"You've never…" I said in a shocked voice. My eyes widened. I could believe Drew had never slept with someone.

"Shut up," Drew hissed as a few random people stared at us. I lowered my voice.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I said.

"It's not something I generally tell people," he hissed back.

"But I figured you…" I still couldn't believe it.

"Well I haven't so let's forget we had this conversation," he said as the whistle blew. We both got up and started practicing free throws.

I was really shocked to find that out. Drew was a year older than me and he was a pretty big player. I figured he would've slept with a bunch of girls. He even hooked up with Bianca in the boiler room. Well, whatever. I'd get Drew to tell me the rest of the story later.


	11. Chapter 11

Author's Note: OMG! There's so much snow! It's been snowing for like 2 days! Well anyway, here's chapter 11! enjoy! So I'd like to thank all the reviews =) Your reviews made me so happy! So there are only 17 days until Degrassi! =) And so the countdown begins! Without further ado, I present chapter 11!

Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi!

Drew's POV

"Hi, Alli," I said as she answered the door. She looked beautiful. She was wearing a pink skirt and a white tank top with a leather jacket. She also had on high black heels. "You look amazing," I said flirtatiously.

"Why thank you," she retorted sassily. She smiled and motioned for me to come in. She had said on the phone her parents weren't home and she wanted to watch a movie.

As I sat on the couch, I wondered aloud," What movie are we watching?"

"The Last Song," Alli said smiling devilishly. I groaned. "Don't worry," she said suggestively, "We probably won't watch much." I smiled at that.

"Then let's get the movie started." I hadn't kissed Alli much since we've gotten back together a few weeks ago. I mean, after dates I'd give her a kiss, but it wasn't anything particularly special.

Alli put the movie in and went to make popcorn. When she came back in, she skipped over to the couch with the popcorn in hand. I patted the seat next to me and she sat down. I watched her for a moment. I couldn't believe how lucky I was to have her. She was perfect and I never wanted to let her go. I put my arm around her. When she looked up at me, I smiled and kissed her forehead. She smiled and looked back at the movie. My eyes never left her.

Half way through the movie, I couldn't take it anymore. First of all, I wasn't into chick flicks, and second, Alli was just so kissable! I wanted her extremely badly. I pulled her closer to me and she snuggled into my chest. I smelled the fruity sent of her shampoo and I could no longer resist. I titled her chin up to me and I kissed her, slowly at first but it began to get more passionate. Before I knew it, she was straddling my lap. She had her hands tangled in my hair as my hands explored her back.

A half hour later we were still going at it. My shirt lay long discarded on the floor. Alli was straddling me as I lay on the couch. She kissed down my jaw line and I moaned. She looked up at me and smiled, but only for a second because I brought her lips to mine and we began to kiss. I took off Alli's jacket and tossed it to the floor. I felt almost like the old Drew again. The only difference was I was a smarter Drew. One that would never be controlled by his hormones. Or at least, entirely controlled, I decided as Alli undid my belt. Alli then kissed down my stomach to the top of my boxers. Just then the front door opened. Alli looked up quickly and jumped off me. I sat up and turned to see who it was. It was Sav. Oh boy.

"Uh hi Sav. Drew and I were just watching a movie. Right Drew," Alli said looking at me.

"Yes, we were," I said in my most innocent voice.

"You were watching The Last Song?" Sav said skeptically as he looked at the screen.

"Yeah, it's a very good movie," I said smiling.

"I see," Save said nodding his head. "Well have fun." He began to walk away but turned back to me. "And Drew, next time you watch a movie at my house, try to keep your clothes on." He smirked and walked out of the room.

Alli giggled and I smiled at her. That hadn't been too bad. Seeing Sav in school would be pretty awkward, but other than that, I'd say that went pretty well.

"So where were we?" Alli said suggestively as she came and straddled my lap. I kissed her once, but pulled away.

"What time is it?" I asked. Alli grabbed my watch off the table and checked.

"5:45," she replied. I paled. My mom had ordered I be home by six.

"I have to be home at six," I said in an unhappy tone. Alli frowned but passed me my shirt, watch, and shoes. I redressed and put my phone in my pocket.

"Call me," Alli said as we walked to the front door. I gave her a kiss. I had intended for it to be a peck, but it turned out to be a full blown French kiss. I regrettably pulled away.

"I will. I promise," I said finally. With that, I walked out the door and began to walk home. The Toronto weather was getting to me. It was so cold! I can't wait until I get a car.

Adam's POV

I heard the front door open. It was 5:59. Wow, Drew knew how to cut it close. Luckily, our mom was on the phone so she wouldn't be able to interrogate him right now. Drew had said he was going out, but I knew he was going to be with Alli. He saw her every single moment he could. I guess when your girlfriend goes to a different school you have to spend all the time you can together.

I heard Drew's footsteps on the stairs. I walked into the hall and followed him into his room.

"Hey Andrew," I said. "How was your date with Alli?"

"Awesome," he said wearing a goofy smile. "We watched a movie,"

I looked him over and smirked. I had seen Drew getting ready and he had definitely been wearing a belt. I remembered because he had tried on two before choosing the one he had worn. Drew wasn't wearing any belt now.

"So you watched a movie?" I said still smirking.

"Yeah, why?" he said taking off his shoes.

"Well, you went to Alli's wearing a belt and you came back without one. So, I'm just a little curious why it came off." I tried very hard not to laugh. Drew turned red when he realized I was right. "So you had to be doing something other than watching a movie." I laughed as Drew threw a pillow at me.

"Shut up," he said but I continued to laugh. "Nothing happened."

"Okay, sure. Let's see what mom thinks," I said. I was joking but I knew it would freak Drew out

"I swear to God, Adam," he said.

"Then tell your favorite brother what happened." I said pouting. Drew groaned.

"Fine. Alli and I were making out. Happy?" he said looking at me.

"And then you took your pants off," I offered. He glared at me.

"Ha ha so funny. Actually no, I didn't." I raised my eyebrows. "Sav walked in," he continued. A smiled crept onto my lips and I started to laugh. "It's not funny," he said evenly.

"It's freaking hilarious," I said. Drew cracked a smiled. "So anyway, you seem really happy," I commented. He'd been acting super happy since him and Alli had gotten back together a few weeks ago.

"Yeah, I am. I missed Alli, a lot. I'm really happy to have her back," he said smiling while he said it. I hated Alli but if she made Drew happy, I wasn't going to say anything.

"Well you better wipe that goofy smile off your face before we have dinner because you know Mom's gonna say something about it." I warned. Our mom hated Alli more than I did and she wasn't afraid to show it. When Drew told her they were back together she had been so mad.

"Okay, thanks. Now bye," Drew said pushing me out of his room. I laughed and walked back to my room.

Sav's POV

Holly J and I were walking into Mrs. Dawes room to ask her about making an announcement for LARPing when I saw Drew. He was with Mrs. Dawes and seemed to be upset. Holly J and I waited outside the room, but still in hearing range.

"Drew, you're a nice kid, but I can't give you any more chances. If you fail another assignment, it'll be hard to pass the class. Understood?" she said to him.

"Yes, Mrs. Dawes, I understand. I'll really try to do better," he said sincerely.

"I know you try hard, Drew. Have you thought about getting a tutor?" She suggested gently.

"I'm being tutored in almost every class," Drew said darkly.

"Alright. Just study for the exam next week and continue reading," she said dismissing him.

"Alright, Bye Mrs. Dawes," he said walking out. He saw me and looked uncomfortable. He cleared his throat.

"Hey Sav, Holly J," he said smiling his charming smile despite his evident discomfort. Holly J and I greeted him and he walked away. When he was gone, Holly J looked at me curiously.

"That was awkward," she noted.

"Yeah," I looked at the ground. I wanted her to drop the subject.

"Something happen?" she pressed.

"I walked in on him and Alli over the weekend," I said reluctantly. I didn't bother elaborating.

"What were they doing?" She asked.

"Well," I recalled. "Drew was lying on our living room couch shirtless and Alli was straddling him, so what do you think they were doing?" She nodded knowingly. "Oh I forgot to add the fact that his belt was on the floor." Holly J laughed.

"No wonder he feels awkward around you," she concluded.

"Yeah, I am the scary big brother of the girl he got caught making out with," I added.

"Yeah, because you're so scary," she joked as we walked into Mrs. Dawes room.


	12. Chapter 12

Adam's POV

"Bye Boys, see you tomorrow afternoon," my mom said as her and my dad got into the car. They were leaving for the weekend, visiting Grams. Grams knew about me being Adam, but she didn't yet know about Fiona. Mom was afraid to overwhelm her so they decided that it would be best if they went to Grams rather than her come here. Since Drew and I both wanted to stay in Toronto so we could be with our friends and girlfriends. That meant Drew and I had the house to ourselves. Well, Drew and Alli really. I was sleeping over Eli's because Drew wanted Alli to come over. Drew hadn't asked me to leave the house, but I really didn't want to be an awkward third wheel in my own house.

It was just going to be Eli and me tonight since Clare and Fiona were having a sleepover. Alli told her parents that she was going to be at Fiona's house with Clare, so Fiona and Clare were having a sleepover so it seemed legit if Alli's parents called Clare's. Drew and Alli did all this planning just to have a night alone. I understood though. Alli's parents and my mom are very strict so Alli and Drew hardly ever have time alone. The only time was when one of their parents is out of town, which isn't exactly often.

"So I have a few hours before Alli comes," Drew said finally. It was 12 in the afternoon and Alli wasn't going to come until 5. "What do you wanna do?" he asked.

"We could play Black Ops," I said eyeing the TV. Drew smiled a devilish smile.

"You're going down," he said as we both ran to the couch.

Adam's POV

"So Drew and Alli have the house to themselves tonight?" Eli asked while we were reading some comic books.

"Yeah. He's been looking forward to it," I replied, putting my comic book down.

"I bet he has," Eli said while smirking.

"Whatever do you mean, Elijah?" I said feigning innocence. I knew exactly what he meant.

"Well, it's Drew," he said matter-of-factly. "I wonder what they're doing?" he said sarcastically.

"Actually," I said seriously, "It seemed pretty innocent. They're going to have a movie marathon and go in the hot tub." I remember Drew telling me that.

"Hot tub?" Eli asked curiously. I had forgotten he didn't know about it.

"Yeah, we have a hot tub," I said with a laugh. Eli put his hand on his heart in mock hurt.

"And why was I never taken in." he said. I raised my eyebrows. How did Eli expect an FTM to go swimming? "Right," he said quickly. "I wouldn't want to go in now anyway."

"What?" I said giving him a confused look.

"Well if Drew and Alli are going in," he said trailing off.

"I don't think they'd do anything bad in there," I said. Eli laughed. "I mean Drew is…" I couldn't find a good way to say this.

"Spit it out Torres," Eli said looking interested.

"Well, let's just say you are a bit more experienced than Drew." Eli's eyebrows shot up.

"You mean, Drew is-", I cut him off.

"He's never really had a steady girlfriend before Alli and Drew thinks it's a big deal, not something to do with just anyone. But that might change tonight. Drew told me that he's going to tell her he loves her."

"Wow," Eli said. "Drew seems serious about Alli."

"I know. It's weird, but I can tell her really cares her." I said.

"Wow," Eli said as we both went back to our comic books.

Drew's POV

It was almost time for Alli to come. Adam left for Eli's an hour ago and I've been making sure everything is perfect. I have all her favorite movies, her favorite drinks, favorite snack, and favorite candy. I set up the pull out couch in the basement too, just in case. We can do whatever Alli wants tonight. I think Adam assumes I want to sleep with her tonight, but that's not my plan. I just want to be with her. Because I finally realized that I love her. And I'm going to tell her that.

I looked in the mirror to make sure I looked okay. I was wearing light wash jeans, a bright blue tee shirt, and a blue and yellow flannel. I sprayed on more cologne. Just then, the doorbell rang and I got up to get it. I was very excited. I opened the door. Alli looked amazing. She was in ripped grey skinny jeans and flowing black top. She had a duffle bag in her hand.

"Hi Beautiful," I said giving her a kiss and grabbing her bag.

"Hi boyfriend," she said smiling and kissing me again. We walked in and sat at the couch. "So what's the plan?" she asked.

"Movie marathon first," I said looking at the stack of movies. She squealed and I laughed. I loved seeing her happy.

After watching all the movies and eating dinner, it was 11 o'clock. I had told Alli to bring a bathing suit but she didn't know why yet. I walked over to her bag and threw it towards her. She looked up curiously.

"Get your bathing suit on. I have a surprise," I said smiling. She smiled back and walked into the bathroom. I quickly ran into my room and got dressed. When I came back, Alli was still getting ready so I checked on my surprise. It was my favorite room of the house, the room with the indoor hot tub. My parents always wanted a hot tub but Toronto was super cold all year long so they decided to have a pool room made in our basement. It's actually really sick. Adam and I haven't shown anyone yet, we wanted to keep it to ourselves for a while. But tonight I wanted to go in with Alli.

"Drew," I heard her call. I ran up the stairs and saw her waiting for me. She looked absolutely stunning. She was wearing a lime green bikini. I couldn't help but stare at her perfect body. "So what's the surprise?" she asked eyeing me.

"Follow me," I said. We walked down the stairs and into the pool room. When she saw the hot tub she squealed. She threw her arms around my neck and I gave her a spinning hug. When I put her down she ran into the hot tub.

"Come on Drew," she called. "It's so warm!" I smiled and ran in. We sat and talked for a while before she came and sat on my lap. We sat and looked into each other's eyes for a few minutes. I leaned in and whispered in her ear.

"I love you, Alli." I did love her. She was more special than any other girl I'd dated. Alli was the first person I'd ever loved. When I said it, Alli looked shocked. I kissed her softly and pulled away.

"I love you too, Drew," she said quietly. I pulled her close to me. We stayed like that for a while. Then, all of a sudden, Alli began to slowly kiss up my jaw line. I moaned softly. She knew it drove me crazy. It drove me even crazier because she was pressed up to me in nothing but her bikini. We began kissing. My hands caressed up and down her bare back while she caressed my chest. She started to kiss down my chest and I didn't stop her. She pulled on the stings of my bathing suit and gave me a sassy smile. She moved her hands to my butt and I couldn't take it anymore. I picked her up and carried her to the bed in the basement.

There we continued our make out session. I moved myself on top of Alli and I began to kiss her more passionately than before. I let my hands wander and she moaned. I slowly moved my hand up her leg, to her inner thigh. She moaned happily and I left it there. Alli's hand traveled down my chest. Her cold fingers on my abs made me shiver in pleasure. She pulled my hair back so I was an inch from her lips. It was very frustrating. I wanted her so badly and she was teasing me. I groaned, which made her smile. When she finally let go, her hands rubbed up and down my back. I gave her one last long kiss before I pulled away. Alli pouted. I laughed and went to kissing her neck.

She whispered in my ear, "I love you."

"I love you too, Alli." I said as I moved to lie beside her. We were both exhausted. We went under the covers, which were now damp from our bathing suits but neither of us cared. Alli snuggled into my bare chest and I put my arm around her. The time on the clock said 1:55 am. I kissed her forehead and we both fell asleep.


	13. Chapter 13

Adam's POV

I walked home at about nine the next morning. Eli was going to go out with Clare so I figured I'd give him time to get ready. When I got home, I didn't know what to expect. I opened the front door and saw the first floor wasn't totally destroyed. There were movies scattering the living room but the only dishes I was were two glasses of fruit punch. When I walked into the kitchen I saw all the dishes were neatly stacked in the sink. They weren't washed, but it was surprising enough that they were in the sink.

When I was done inspecting the first floor, I went upstairs. It seemed completely untouched. I looked in Drew's room and realized no one had been in it. Drew and Alli must've slept down stairs. I dropped my bag in my room and changed into new clothes. I balled up my dirty laundry and went to go but it in the laundry room, which was in the basement.

I stood outside the basement door for about 5 minutes, contemplating whether or not to walk down. I knew Drew and Alli were down there and I wasn't sure if I wanted to see what had happened last night. I finally decided to just go down. It couldn't be that bad.

I slowly opened the door and crept down the stairs. I figured they were asleep and I really didn't want to wake them. As soon as the main room came into view, I saw Drew and Alli sleeping on the bed. Alli was snuggled up really close to Drew and he had his arm around her. It was actually really cute. As I was walking past the bed to the laundry room, I noticed that Drew wasn't wearing a shirt and Alli appeared to be wearing a bikini top. That made Drew and Alli's sleeping a little less cute.

I dropped my laundry off and I realized it was a lot warmer in the main room than the rest of the house. Drew must've put the heat up since they were going to be cold coming out of the hot tub if he didn't. I didn't know Drew was that thoughtful. I walked back up the stairs and straight to my room. I'd stay there until Alli left. I figured they would appreciate the privacy.

At about 10 I heard Drew and Alli. They were in the kitchen making breakfast. From the smell, I guessed they were having pancakes. I listened to them flirt and kiss and eat. I could hear them clearly from my room.

"I'll be right back, I just want to see if Adam's upstairs," I heard Drew say. I continued to read my comic book until I heard the door open. "Hey Adam," he said with a smile. "When did you get home?"

"At about 9," I replied. "How was your night?"

"We'll talk later. Alli is going over to Fiona's in a few minutes so we'll be able to talk then." He smiled and walked out.

I heard him and Alli talking more about when they were going to see each other again. Drew suggested the movies but Alli said that they'd seem so many movies last night so they should do something more exciting.

"How about the park?" Drew asked.

"The park?" Alli said sounding confused.

"Yeah, you know slides, swings, monkey bars." I could hear the smile in his voice.

"Alright, fine. Monday afternoon we'll go to the park." Before Drew could say anything there was a honk from outside. "That's Fi," Alli said. I heard her heels clacking as she walked to the door.

"Bye, I love you," Drew said. I heard them kiss.

"I love you, too," she said. The front door opened and closed. Drew and I were alone with about an hour until our parents came home. I heard the water running and him running around. He was probably cleaning up from last night. I would have to remind him to wash the bed linens from the downstairs pull out couch/bed. Our mom would be suspicious if the pull out bed had been slept in.

Forty-Five minutes later Drew came into my room. He looked kind of tired, but mostly happy. He was still smiling.

"So how was your night?" he asked.

"Good, Eli and I read comic books, played video games, and talked about our girlfriends. But I'm more interested to hear about your night. So did you use a condom or did you follow K.C's lead and just chance it?" I said smirking at the end. No doubt Drew had a more exciting night than I did. Drew rolled his eyes.

"Alli and I had a movie marathon until 11," he said. I nodded for him to continue. "Then we went in the hot tub and then we went to sleep." He sat down on my bed. "That's all that happened."

"Somehow I don't believe you," I said. Drew sighed.

"We made out in the hot tub and then we made out on the bed until like 2. Does that answer all your questions?" He had his eyebrows raised.

"That's as far as you guys went?" I asked.

"Yes, Adam. I would've told you otherwise. I wouldn't keep that from you." He said sincerely.

"I believe you," I amended. "So you told her you love her?"

Clare's POV

"…And then we went in the hot tub. It was so romantic. He told me he loves me! Then things got quiet sexy," Alli gushed. She was describing her night with Drew to Fiona and me. Neither of us were surprised. Adam told Fiona what Drew was planning and she had told me.

"Did you guys…?" Fiona asked. I was wondering the same thing.

"No!" Alli said quickly. "He didn't pressure me at all! I mean, I wouldn't have minded going further than we did but he didn't even try. He seemed so happy just the way things were."

That didn't sound like the Drew who went into the boiler room with Bianca a few months ago, but these past few months Drew's showed me he's not the guy people think he is. I'm really happy that Alli and Drew are back together. Drew started eating again and he's getting better emotionally. I never thought it would happen. I was also happy for Alli because Drew seems like the perfect boyfriend. I knew he would be. Drew would never hurt Alli again. I was just afraid that Alli would hurt him.

"Did you say I love you back?" I asked. Drew told me he loved Alli a few days ago. I believed him. He said he'd never told a girl he loved her before so he was nervous.

"Yes, of course!" she said.

"You love him?" Fiona asked.

"Well, I don't know, but I really like him." Fiona and I grimaced. "But I'll start loving him in time. I mean, I just started to trust him again." Alli had a point so I didn't press the subject.

"Well, it sounds like it was an amazing evening," Fiona concluded.


	14. Chapter 14

Clare's POV

It was Wednesday morning and I was sitting on the steps with Drew. Eli and Adam were reading comic books on the picnic tables a few feet away from us. I was doodling Eli's name all over my notebook while Drew was aimlessly playing with a basketball.

"So I heard your date with Alli went well," I said looking up at him. He stopped playing with the ball and smiled an enormous smile.

"Yeah, it was pretty awesome. What did she say to you?" he asked curiously.

"Just that it was super romantic and fun. She was gushing about it forever." He smiled even brighter. "So you finally told her you love her."

"She told you about that?" he asked. He seemed a little embarrassed but recovered and answered me. "Yeah, I did."

"Aw," I said. Drew interrupted me before I could say anything else.

"I feel like my life is finally on track. I mean, everything is going great. I think I'm getting better." He smiled when he finished.

"Really, Drew? That's awesome!" I said hugging him. I have waited months for him to say that. "So you're really done? With the starving, cutting, and self deprecation?" I questioned.

"I'm completely done with cutting and I'm getting better and better with the other two. I'll be fully recovered in no time. Finally, I can put all that past me because my life is going to be perfect," he said simply. I was so happy. I could tell what he said was true. I could finally stop worrying about Drew. The relief was immense.

"I'm so glad," I said. "So, when are you seeing Alli?"

"Today after school. She's helping me study." He smiled another 100 watt smile.

"Awesome." I smiled almost as big as Drew. I was so happy to have Drew happy and healthy again.

Fiona's POV

I walked up the side walk to Adam's house. We usually stayed at my condo, but my maid was going to be cleaning all day so Adam suggested we got to his house. I rang the door bell and Adam quickly came to the door.

"Hello, Beautiful," he greeted as he leaned in for a peak. I obliged and walk into the house. It was eerily silent. I knew Mr. and Mrs. Torres weren't home, but I thought Drew would be home.

"Where's Drew?" I asked sitting down on the couch. Adam sat next to me as he rolled his eyes.

"He's with Alli. They're spending the day at the park." He sounded sickened.

"Aw, that's cute," I cooed. I couldn't help it. Drew and Alli were just adorable.

"Of course you think it's cute," Adam said grumpily. "You don't have to live with Drew talking about Alli all the time. He's constantly smiling and he texts her every morning and every night. He's the perfect boyfriend, it's weird."

"Why is it weird?" I asked. Adam could be so bizarre sometimes.

"Because he's Drew. He usually doesn't care and it's easy. I've never seen him so in love before. I don't mind that he's changed his player ways, but I just wish it wasn't because of Alli." I frowned.

"Why don't you like Alli?" I asked. He had no reason not to like her.

"I don't know. She has such a hold on him. I'm afraid she'll take advantage of it." I finally understood why he was being like this. He was being protective of Drew.

"Well she makes him happy, right?"

"Yeah," he said reluctantly.

"So that's all that matters right?" I asked.

"Yeah I guess." He amended. "Well, enough about Drew and Alli. What do you want to do today?" he asked.

"Oh, I don't know." I said suggestively as I leaned in to kiss him.

Alli's POV

Drew and I were sitting together at one of the picnic tables in front of Degrassi. I had decided to visit him during lunch because my school had a half day. We were eating peanut butter sandwiches that Drew had made us. He is so sweet! I know that I had planned to cheat on him, but I felt so guilty. He was a totally different guy, so sweet and amazing. I didn't know if I could do it. Maybe, I'd just leave things as they were: perfect.

"I love that we get to eat together today," he said with a smile. I rid myself of my thoughts and smiled back. "I wish we could do it every day."

"If only my parents would let me come back to Degrassi," I lied. I was happy that I wasn't at Degrassi. Even though I missed everyone like crazy, if I break Drew's heart, which I need to do, I won't want to see him at all.

"Your parents mean well," he said. "But I wish I had someone to kiss in between classes," he joked.

"You better not be kissing anyone but me," I said with a little extra sass.

"I would never," he said sincerely. In that moment, I believed he really wouldn't and it made me feel worse about what I was going to do. Before I could reply, Drew looked at his watch. "Ugh! I've got to meet Mr. Perino. He said he needed to talk to me." Drew grimaced.

"Alright, see you after school," I said with a small smile. Drew kissed me and grabbed his stuff.

"Bye Alli," he said walking backwards to the school. "I love you."

I waved to him as he walked into the school. Degrassi still had 20 minutes left of lunch and I didn't want to go home. I looked up and I saw Dave. Bingo! He was just the guy I wanted to see.

"Dave!" I called. He saw me and he looked happy. I waved him over. As he walked over I decided that if I could get any guy to help me cheat on my boyfriend, it would be him.

"Hey Alli. Long time no see," he said as he took a seat across from me, the seat Drew had previously occupied.

"Hey Dave. How have you been?" I half listened while he answered. I waited for him to finish before I asked my next question. "No girlfriend?"

"Nope. I'm single and it sucks," Dave replied. I laughed. "Well I guess you wouldn't know."

"Yeah," I said, upset that he had brought Drew up. "We should catch up."

"Definitely," he smiled brightly.

"How about Friday, at the park?" I asked trying to sound casual. I mentally kicked myself for picking the park. Drew and I had just gone to the park last weekend.

"Yeah. That sounds great," he tried to act casual but unlike me, he was failing.

"I'll text you the details," I got up and began to walk away. Then a thought hit me: Drew. "Oh and Dave," he looked at me curiously. "Don't mention anything to Drew. I wouldn't want him to be jealous for no reason."

"Yeah, of course," he said. Yes, I had him wrapped around my finger.

"Well, bye Dave," I said with a wave.

"Bye Alli. See you Friday," he said. Uh oh, what had I done?

Drew's POV

"Drew," Mr. Perino said in an exasperated tone. "You're failing. Either you get your grades up or you go to summer school. And if you make me come in this summer, I'll make your life hell," he droned on. Usually, his words would upset me, but I was too busy thinking about Alli. I meant to ask her if she had any plans for Friday but I forgot. I'd have to text her later.

Mr. Torres," he yelled. "Are you listening to me at all?" I looked up and nodded. "Fine then, get out of here!"

"Alright Sir," I said as I quickly left. I decided to text Alli now.

Hey what r u doing Friday? I

was thinking about another hot date ;)

A few seconds later my phone vibrated.

Sorry babe :( I've got plans

I was a little disappointed but it wasn't the end of the world.

Saturday? I think my parents

are going to be out ;)

I walked down the hall and saw Dave. I gave him a wave. I'd met him because of basketball. He was a pretty cool guy.

Def! ;) I can't wait!

I smiled to myself. Then walked to my locker before my next class.

Dave's POV

I couldn't believe I'd seen Alli at lunch. She went to an all girl's school on the other side of town. I figured I would never run into her anymore, but I was wrong. When she saw me, she called me over. I was really surprised, but happy. I've been crushing on Alli for 8 months. Even if she wasn't at Degrassi, I still couldn't get her out of my head. She was my dream girl.

During our talk, she asked me to hang out on Friday. I was so happy. That is, until I remembered her boyfriend, Drew. Drew was the perfect catch, in a girls mind. He was a popular jock, girls thought he was perfectly hot, and he could apparently charm any girl. There was no way Alli would dump Drew for anyone, let alone me. When I'd agreed to Friday, Alli asked me not to tell Drew. At first it seemed weird, but as I thought about it, it made sense. We didn't want him to be jealous or mad over nothing.

After thinking about our meeting all day long, it was time for basketball practice. Even though the season was over, Coach Armstrong still made us practice so we'd be even better next year. I walked into the locker room and there was the person I'd been dreading all day: Drew. I felt guilty looking at him, knowing I was in love with his girlfriend and was hanging out with her behind his back. While I changed, Drew and K.C were talking a few feet away.

"What are you doing Friday?" Drew asked K.C.

"I'm going to watch the baby for Jenna. She needs a night off," he explained. I knew Jenna had her baby a few weeks ago. Her name was escaping me, but everyone thought she was adorable.

"I can help you, if you want," Drew said while putting on his sneaker.

"I thought you'd be with Alli," K.C said with a small laugh.

"Me too, but she has plans. So what do you say?" I got nervous hearing him talk about Alli and Friday night. I couldn't help but blame myself for Drew's empty Friday night. I wondered, if he knew she was hanging with me and not him, would he try to kill me?

"Are you sure you want to spend your Friday night taking care of a baby?" K.C asked skeptically.

"If it helps you and Jenna and gives me something to do, I'm all for it," Drew said with a smile.

"Okay. Come over around 6," he said as they both walked out of the locker room. Connor gave me a weird stare when he saw I was standing there engrossed in Drew and K.C's conversation. Luckily, it was only Connor and I left. I quickly finished changing and ran into the gym.


	15. Chapter 15

Drew's POV

It was Friday. Since Alli was busy, I decided to hang out with K.C, even if it meant taking care of the baby. When I got home from basketball practice, I took a shower and went down stairs for dinner. After dinner, I went up stairs to grab my phone and a pair of sneakers. I put one sneaker on and saw Adam appear in my door way.

"Yes?" I asked switching to the other foot.

"Going out with Alli?" he guessed. I shook my head.

"No, I'm going to help K.C with the baby," I explained. Jenna had had her baby a few weeks ago. Her name was Briana Nicole Guthrie. She was really cute.

"Really? Are you sure that's a good idea? Last time I check you weren't educated in child care," he joked.

"Yeah, how hard can it be?" I reasoned. Adam gave me a lot.

"Okay whatever. Have fun," he said leaving. I followed him out and called down the stairs. "Mom! I need a ride!"

Dave's POV

I was so excited. It was finally Friday night and I was going to meet Alli in the park. I knew her parents were really strict so I wasn't surprised she'd suggested another venue for our talk. Like I'd said, I hadn't mentioned it to Drew. It wasn't like we were doing anything wrong, but I just didn't want him to know. He might get jealous. But then again, why would Drew be jealous of a guy like me?

"Hey you," Alli said flirtatiously as I approached. I sat down on the blanket she has sitting on.

"Hey Alli," I said as I cleared my throat. Oh God, way to seem desperate.

"So let's play a game," she suggested. All I did was nod. If it was anything like the last game we'd played (Never Have I Ever), it was sure to be an interesting evening.

About two hours later, Alli and I were laughing and having fun. Alli's game consisted of running, sliding, climbing, talking, and laughing. When we were done playing, we went back to the blanket. Alli and I laid down laughing until our abs hurt. She finally sat up.

"That was the most fun I've ever had," Alli said which made me sit up. I was really happy she had fun. Maybe we could do this again.

"Me too," I said smiling. Alli and I looked at each other for a second. She looked so beautiful. All of a sudden she was leaning in. Without thinking I did the same and we kissed. It was the perfect kiss! I could hear the fireworks going off in the background. We kissed for almost 30 seconds before she pulled away. I looked at her for a second before I realized what I had just done. I had just kissed Drew Torres' girlfriend.

"Oh my gosh," Alli said with her eyes opened wide. She was thinking the same thing. "I can't believe we just…"

"I know," I said. "I'm so sorry. I feel so guilty." I did feel guilty. I didn't want to cause problems with Drew and Alli.

"You? You're not the one with a boyfriend. I can't believe I did that," she fretted.

"Well don't worry. It won't happen again," I vowed.

"That's not the problem. I want it to happen again. I like you, Dave. Maybe even more than Drew," she said looking at me shyly. I couldn't believe my ears. The girl I had a huge crush on liked me back! Only, she has a boyfriend.

"I really like you too," I began. Alli leaned in for another kiss, but I stopped her. "But you need to end things with Drew first."

"Drew!" she exclaimed sadly. "I feel so bad. I don't want to hurt him. Dave, can you give me some time to break up with him? I promise it will be soon."

"Take as long as you want," I said. I really couldn't tell her what to do.

"But I want to keep seeing you Dave. I don't think I'll be able to stay away." She said seductively. She then leaned in to kiss me. Against my better judgment, I kissed her back. I pulled away and looked up to see someone staring at us. I looked closer and saw it was Wesley. Uh oh.

Wesley's POV

I couldn't believe my eyes. Dave and Alli kissed, more than once. I knew Dave had a huge crush on Alli, but everyone in the whole school knew Drew was dating her. He only talked about her all the time. He wouldn't even talk to other girls except his friends Fiona and Clare. I couldn't believe she was cheating on him. Anyone could see that he really loved her.

"Wes, wait!" I heard Dave call. I turned around and saw him running to me. He stopped out of breath. "Wes, what you saw, it was nothing."

"Really, it didn't look like nothing," I said simply. "It looked like Alli was cheating on Drew."

"Wes, don't tell anyone, please. She's going to break up with him," Dave pleaded.

"Fine. I promise," I said as I walked away. I wondered how long it would be before this drove me crazy. I felt like I owed it to Drew to tell him. He was nice to me when I needed help and he's been friendly to me since. I didn't know why I was helping Alli and Dave, but I promised I would so I had to.


	16. Chapter 16

Drew's POV

These past few months have been amazing. Alli and I have been going really strong. I'm really in love with her. I feel like for the first time I'm in something really good. I would do nothing to ruin this relationship. Every once in a while I would skip a meal, but then I would think of Alli. She needed a healthy boyfriend, not a sick one. She was the reason I was getting better. Without her, I would still be starving myself.

Alli makes me feel like I'm worth something. She praises me a lot, which really boosts my self esteem. I'm still failing all my classes, but when I get frustrated, Alli helps me out. She's my life saver. Right before she told me she wanted to get back together, I felt like I was in a downward spiral. I thought there was no way I could get better. When Alli took me back, I felt hope for the first time in a long time.

I never thought anyone could love someone like me, but Alli showed me she did love me. I felt a jolt in my stomach every time she told me that. I felt like the luckiest guy on Earth. My girlfriend, the amazing, kind, wonderful Alli Bhandari, was in love with a guy like me. I couldn't believe she was all mine. Maybe I wasn't so bad after all. If Alli could love me, than I could learn to love myself. Anyone Alli approved of must be an alright person. She really saved me. I don't know what I'd do without her.

Dave's POV

I walked down the hall after school with my head held high. I was going over to Alli's house now. We've been hang out every day (except Friday) after school for two weeks, since basketball finally ended. We would kiss and talk and just chill. Sav was always doing student council stuff after school until 4:30, so I stayed until then. Drew studied after school with K.C everyday so we didn't have to worry about him catching us. It was easy for Alli to lie to him because she didn't have to see him for 7 hours almost every day. I tried to stay away from him, but it was tough. Speak of the Devil. I saw him and K.C on a bench by the front door. I tried to walk past them unnoticed, but I failed.

"Hey Dave," K.C called. We used to be good friends. "You're in my math class, right?"

"Yeah," I said. K.C and I were in a lot of gifted classes together.

"Come here for a second," he said. I walked over and saw what they were working on. Quadratic equations. I had learned them last year. "What is the quadratic formula? I'm totally blanking." I racked my brain and I finally remembered.

"," I said. Drew looked impressed and K.C threw his hands in the air.

"That's it! Thanks Dave," he said with a smile.

"Yeah, thanks a lot man. You're awesome." Drew seconded flashing his 100 watt smile.

"No problem," I said walking away internally grimacing. Drew actually like me. He was always friendly to me. His niceness made me feel even guiltier about seeing Alli behind his back. I really didn't want to hurt Drew. Hopefully, he would never find out about Alli and my little fling.

Alli's POV

I had been cheating on Drew for about 2 weeks now. It was weird because when I was with Drew, everything was perfect. Then, when I was alone I felt so guilty. I couldn't believe I was doing this to him. Every time I felt guilty I remembered what he did to me. He cheated on me in the beginning of the year. It was only fair I show him the pain he caused. Granted, Drew and I didn't love each other then, but still. Drew was a big boy. When he finds out about Dave, he'll be upset at first, but he'll eventually pick himself up and get over it, right? As if on cue, I got a text message from Drew.

Good morning, Little Miss 3 Sleep well? ;)

Good morning? I looked at the clock and saw it was only 9am on a Saturday morning. It felt a lot later because I'd been stressing about Drew since six. I sighed. He always sent me the sweetest messages. I scrolled through my texts and found the message he had sent me last night.

I wish I could talk to you all night but you need

your beauty sleep. Good night babe. I love you.

I sighed happily. Without thinking I hit the call bottom. In a few rings, Drew picked up. He sounded terrible.

"Hey Babe," he said. He sounded congested and his throat sounded scratchy.

"Are you okay?" I asked; my voiced clouded with concern.

"Yeah, just sick," he said coughing.

"Feel better," I said. "If it helps, I've been thinking about you all morning."

"Oh really? Only good things I hope," he replied flirtatiously. I frowned. Drew didn't want to know the things I'd been thinking about him.

"Of course!" I lied.

"Good," he said with a laugh. "But Alli I'm really sorry I can't take you out today. I feel awful and plus I wouldn't want to get you sick."

"I understand," I said. I felt happy but that made me feel guilty. My boyfriend was sick. Why was I happy? I unfortunately knew the reason: If I wasn't with Drew that meant I could be with Dave.

"I'll probably be texting you all day since I'll need you to save me from my misery," he joked. I grimaced. It would be weird to text Drew while I was with Dave.

"Alright. I'll talk to you later," I said already thinking about my day ahead with Dave.

"Okay. Love you, bye," he said. I grimaced and hung up.

I frowned. Drew was the perfect boyfriend and I was a monster. I threw my phone on my bed and sighed. I had two reasonable choices. I could either end my fling with Dave and stay with Drew, or continue with my plan. I wanted to kick myself. Drew had cheated on me and I want my revenge. I had left Degrassi so I could stop letting guys control me. I was going to follow my plan through and see to it that Drew Torres would have the worst broken heart any living soul could have. Smiling wickedly, I sent Dave a text.

Come over to my place… no one's home ;)

Adam's POV

It was Saturday morning. I was down stairs eating breakfast when I heard coughing coming from Drew's room. He sounded terrible. I ran up the stairs to check on him. When I walked into his room I saw him sprawled out on his bed with a box of tissues beside him and a million tissues scattered on the floor. I wrinkled my nose.

"Well don't you look terrible," I stated as Drew glared up at me.

"I feel terrible," he moaned rolling over to face me. He sounded just as terrible as he looked. His nose was red and his eyes were all puffy. His throat seemed scratchy and he sounded congested.

"I guess you're not taking Alli out today," I assumed. Part of me thought he might still take her out being as he hated to be away from her, but the other part knew Drew wasn't that stupid.

"Yeah. I talked to her on the phone a while ago," he said. Of course he was just on the phone with her.

"Well, have fun being sick. I'm going out," I said wanting to escape. I had a date with Fiona today and I didn't want to get sick.

"Adam," he whined. "Will you please stay home with me and make me soup?" I was torn. Drew looked pretty awful and I knew my parents were going to be out all day. I felt bad leaving him here alone. But on the other hand, I had plans with my girlfriend whom I loved. I knew Drew would 100% cancel a date to take care of me, but Fiona won this internal conflict.

"Sorry Andrew, I have plans with Fi," I said apologetically. Drew turned to me and his eyes looked so sad, like a puppy dogs. I felt really bad now. "But don't worry," I cover quickly. "I'll call Clare." I grabbed my cell phone and dialed Clare's number, praying that she was free today.

Clare's POV

I walked up the Torres's driveway at a leisurely pace. Lucky for Adam, Eli was going out of town and Alli said she had plans so I was free. Adam had called me an hour ago and asked me if I'd come stay with Drew because he was sick. I felt bad because Adam sounded desperate. My stellar immune system would be able to withstand the germs so I figured I'd spend my day with Drew. As I approached the door, Adam walked out.

"Hey Clare," he gushed. "Thanks so much for this. You're a life saver."

"No problem," I said smiling as I walked into the house. I immediately saw Drew on the couch. He looked more awful than Adam had implied. He saw lying on the couch in his pajamas. A random basketball game was on TV. Drew had a box of tissues and a waste basket next to him.

"Hey Clare," he waved to me. He sounded congested.

"Hey Drew," I said. I looked at the game on TV trying to remember what K.C taught me about basket ball. "Isn't basketball over in March?"

"NCAA is over in March, but the NBA goes until June," he explained. "But since when do you know anything about basketball?" he said with a laugh.

"I dated K.C, remember?" I pointed out. He nodded. He told me before that he couldn't picture K.C and me dating. "So do you need anything?" I asked putting down my bag.

"Can you make me tea?" he asked politely.

"Of course," I replied in a chipper voice as I walked into the kitchen.

After making Drew tea we talked for a while. He asked about Eli, mostly. Drew and I had become very good friends since I'd seen him at the Dot that one night. I told him everything that happened with Eli, but I got embarrassed sometimes. Drew playfully laughed at me when I blushed. When I got fed up with talking about Eli, I asked Drew about Alli. He had a good 45 minutes worth of things to say about her. Drew could actually be really sweet. At about lunch time, I decided to make us both soup. While I made it, Drew and I chatted about Adam. Adam had been spending more time with Fiona and less with us, but we were happy for him.

It was about 1:30 when we'd finished eating lunch. Drew said he or Adam would do the dishes later, but I decided to do them. Drew was very thankful. It only took me about 15 minutes. During that time, Drew channel surfed. When I was done, I walked back into the living room and sat next to Drew.

"Wanna play a board game?" he asked when I sat down. I agreed and we proceeded to play.

We played every game we could think of: Life, Monopoly, Sorry, and Candy Land. Drew was super competitive and was a pro at all the games. Even so, I managed to beat him a few times. While we played, I noticed he was texting someone. I didn't ask who but I figured it was Alli. It was cute when Drew read the messages because he would smile or chuckle. I wondered if Eli acted like that when I texted him.

At 3, Drew yawned. I had almost forgotten he was sick. I took a moment to study his features. His nose was red, his eyes had dark circles under them, and his smile had been weaker than normal.

"Drew, why don't you sleep?" I suggested.

"Are you sure?" he asked. "I wouldn't want you to be bored." I smiled at his thoughtfulness.

"Yeah, I have a book. Plus, you're going to need to rest if you want to get better," I pointed out.

Drew walked over to the couch and slid under the blankets. Within 5 minutes he was fast asleep. I read my book, Anne of Green Gables. It was a classic. I've read it so many times, I almost had it memorized. Just as I was starting to get into the book, Drew's phone vibrated. I walked over to the phone, curios who it was. Alli's name flashed on the screen. I opened the message. I knew it was wrong, but I couldn't help it. I just wanted on little peak.

Um, yeah. I gotta go bye babe 3

That message was uninteresting. Drew or Alli wouldn't mind if I opened it. Reading one message made me want to reads the rest. I guiltily scrolled through his inbox. I found a message that stuck out.

Too bad we couldn't go out today.

I'm stuck at home with NOTHING

To do. :(

Alli had told me she had plans today. I wonder why she would tell Drew she was free. Also, if she was bored with no plans, why didn't she come visit Drew? Drew was her boyfriend and he was sick. I knew that Drew would have visited Alli no matter what. Well, it's no use over analyzing the situation. There was probably a reasonable explanation. I put the phone down and went back to my book.


	17. Chapter 17

Alli's POV

It was Monday afternoon and I was going to surprise Drew at school. Well, that's what I was going to tell people. I was really going to go to see Dave. We had a make out session planned for this afternoon. As I walked towards Degrassi I saw people coming out. I saw Jenna and K.C and they smiled. I smiled back, but kept walking. I knew Drew would be coming out soon so I decided to sit on the steps and wait. Many people passed before I saw Drew. Shockingly, he was with Dave. Before I could begin to think this over, Drew saw me an enormous smile flashed across his face. He quickly turned to Dave.

"I'll see you later, man," he said as he walked over to me. Dave didn't budge an inch. "Alli," he said happily. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm here to see you, babe," I said as I leaned into a kiss. It was a quick kiss. When I pulled away, I discreetly winked at Dave. When I did, his eyes almost popped out of his sockets. Drew and I sat down on the stairs.

"You have no idea how happy I am to see you," he whispered in a sexy voice. His face was incredibly close to mine. I noticed from the corner of my eyes, that people were looking at us. I'd forgotten how many people hung around Degrassi afterschool.

"Oh is that so?" I whispered copying the sexiness in his voice. He smirked. "So now that you're not sick, can I kiss you?" Without bothering to reply, Drew slowly began to kiss me. We French kissed until Drew pulled away. He must've remembered we weren't alone.

"So what are you doing right now?" he asked breathily.

"Hanging out with you?" I questioned. He smiled.

"Exactly," he said as we both stood up. We intertwined our fingers and started to walk towards The Dot. I looked back at Degrassi and saw Dave. I shrugged. I felt bad about having to cancel our make out session, but Drew came first because he, unlike Dave, was actually my boyfriend.

Dave's POV

I was walking with Drew afterschool and we were talking about sports. I felt really guilty talking to him, but I don't think he noticed. Whenever Drew saw me, he was totally friendly. It made me feel worse. As if it wasn't bad enough I was hooking up with his girlfriend, but he had to be incredibly nice to me. It almost made me rethink being with Alli. Almost.

As we walked out the doors of Degrassi, I saw Alli. She looked beautiful in a white dress and jean jacket. I was almost drooling. Drew turned to me.

"I'll see you later, man," he said as he walked over to Alli. I stayed were I was but watched them. They greeted each other and he kissed her. When she pulled away, she winked at me. My jaw almost dropped. We'd never been that obvious in front of her boyfriend before. I'm surprised Drew didn't notice.

I took a seat on the other side of the stairs and continued to watch them. It wasn't too weird because a lot of people were. Alli and Drew talked with their heads close for a few minutes, but then they started to kiss. I saw Bianca looking at them in disgust. Some freshmen were giggling about it. They were talking about how incredibly hot Drew was. I rolled my eyes, _niners_.

Drew and Alli's kissing wasn't too bad, but I burned with jealousy. I knew that since there were people around, Drew and Alli were keeping it very PG. I didn't even want to know how things usually went. Fortunately, Drew pulled away and they continued to talk. A minute later, they started to walk away hand in hand.

Alli and I had plans afterschool, but I understood that Drew came first. I mean, he _is_ her boyfriend. I watched them walk away and Alli turned around to look at me. She shrugged. I understood this was her apology. Well, whatever. I'd just hang out with Connor. If only Wesley was talking to me. He was mad about my fling with Alli. Whatever, I didn't need him when I had her. I began to walk back into Degrassi to find Connor.


	18. Chapter 18

Drew's POV

I walked into the house after hanging out with Alli. We had gone to the Dot and then back to her place. Being with Alli was the most amazing thing ever. It didn't hurt that she was such a good kisser. That isn't the reason I love Alli, though. I love Alli because she smart, exciting, witty, kind, and everything I could ever want. I love her so much and I am so amazed that she somehow feels the same way about me. When I walked into the kitchen, I saw it was only 5:30. Even though my curfew on a school night was 6 (how dorky), I knew my mom would kill me if came home any later. She looked at me when I walked in. She walked over to me with an unusual expression.

"Drew, we should talk," she said. I could only nod. This couldn't be good. "I got a call from Mr. Perino. He says you're failing." Ah, so that's what this is about.

"I know Mom, but I'm terrible at history. I try really hard, you know I do. I just don't get it at all," I explained. I knew my parents were disappointed that they had a dumb son, but I couldn't help it. K.C and I studied almost every day after school, but I always failed.

"Drew, if you have to retake Grade 11, you'll be in the same grade as Adam. And I know you'll hate that." I cringed at the thought: being in the same grade as my younger brother. I couldn't let that happen.

"I know, Mom. I'll get my grades up," I promised.

"That's not enough Drew. I have no choice but to take away your TV privileges and your Xbox until you get all your grades up. I'm also not allowing you to see Alli." She crossed her arms and her voice rang with finality.

"What?" I screamed. "Mom, you can't do that!"

"Yes I can, Drew. You need to focus on school," she said coldly.

"You can't keep me from being with my girlfriend!" I yelled. "I don't get to see her at school and now I can't see her when I'm home. That's not fair! I'll never be able to see her!" I was steaming mad. I couldn't believe she was doing this to me.

"I'm sorry, Drew. School comes first." She began to walk away.

"Mom!" I said desperately. "Please, I'll do anything. Just don't do that to me. I'll take any other punishment without complaints. Just let me see Alli."

"You can see her again when you get your grades up," she pacified. Her attempts failed. I was never going to get my grades up and she knew that.

"But Mom!" I yelled. She cut me off before I could say anything else.

"No Drew. Maybe it'd be better if you just broke up with her. It's not fair to her if she can never see you." I have never hated my mom more than I did right now.

"Break up with her! Are you joking? I love her, Mom. I need her. Why can't you just stay out of my relationship and let me be happy?" I looked at her, but she ignored me. Frustrated, I ran out of the kitchen, almost running into Adam. I continued to run all the way to my room where I threw myself backwards onto my bed. I stared up at the ceiling. I was so mad.

"This sucks!" I yelled at the top of my lungs as I threw a pillow over my face.

Adam's POV

I was standing outside the kitchen. I had heard most of my Mom's conversation with Drew so far. I knew he was doing badly in school, but couldn't she give him a break? She knew he hated when people thought he was dumb. It wasn't that Drew didn't try. Drew tried harder than everyone else, but he just didn't understand. I felt bad for him.

"I know, Mom. I'll get my grades up," Drew pleaded.

"That's not enough Drew," she chided. "I'm taking away your TV privileges and your Xbox until you get all your grades up. I'm also not allowing you to see Alli." What? She wasn't going to let him see his girlfriend?

"What?" Drew screamed. I had to cover my ears. "Mom, you can't do that!"

"Yes I can, Drew. You need to focus on school." She was being so mean.

"You can't keep me from being with my girlfriend! I don't get to see her at school and now I can't see her when I'm home. That's not fair! I'll never be able to see her!" Drew sounded completely pissed. I peeked into the kitchen and I saw Drew's face was bright red. His hands were clenched into fists.

"I'm sorry, Drew. School comes first." She started to walk towards where I was and I hid.

"Mom! Please, I'll do anything, just don't do that to me. I'll take any other punishment without complaints. Just let me see Alli." Drew sounded really desperate.

"You can see her again when you get your grades up." She was attempting to calm him, but she was failing miserably.

"But Mom!" Drew protested.

"No Drew. Maybe it'd be better if you just broke up with her. It's not fair to her if she can never see you." I couldn't believe what my mom was saying. Was she really that heartless? How could she not see how much Alli meant to Drew?

"Break up with her! Are you joking? I love her, Mom. I need her. Why can't you just stay out of my relationship and let me be happy?" Mom didn't reply and Drew ran out of the room. He ran past me without an acknowledgement at all. I saw him go up the stairs and slam the door to his room. I could only imagine how pissed he was. I knew I'd be so mad if mom did that to me.

"This sucks!" I heard Drew yell faintly. I knew I needed to talk to my mom so I walked into the kitchen.

"You heard," she guessed while she began dinner.

"Yeah. Don't you think you're being too hard on him?" I said gently. I didn't need her mad at me.

"No, he's close to failing the 11th grade. He needs to get his act together." She was so heartless.

"Mom, he's trying the best he can. Don't you get it? You're tearing down his ego. He wants to do better, but he can't! He tries so hard. You don't see him, but I do. He gets so frustrated when he fails, but he can't try any harder." I fought to keep my voice in control.

"Well, what am I supposed to do?" she asked wearily.

"Not this," I hissed. Then I lowered my voice. "Do you really want him to go back to starving himself?" She paled.

"What does that have to do with this?" she asked as her eyes hardened.

"Alli makes him happy. You heard what he said. He said he loves her. If Drew is saying that, you know he means it. No other girl has ever meant this much to him. If you take Alli away, he'll only get more stressed. Then he could go back to starving himself."

"I'm sorry, Adam. My decision is final." I stared at her for a second before I walked out. Unbelievable.


	19. Chapter 19

Adam's POV

"Andrew, dinner," I said as I knocked on his closed door. When he didn't reply, I walked in. He was lying on his back on the floor. I walked over to him and saw he was looking at a picture of Alli. I sat next to him, but he still didn't look at me.

"You really love her," I stated. I couldn't understand why my mother couldn't see that.

"Yeah. I've never felt this way about a girl before." He was still looking at the picture. The love in his eyes was undeniable. "It's weird." He cracked a smile.

"Very weird," I said. "So are you ready for dinner?" I asked standing up. Drew shook his head.

"I'm not hungry," he elaborated. I paled. No, Drew had to eat. He couldn't go back to starving himself.

"Drew you have to eat," I said trying to keep my voice from shaking.

"Relax Adam. It's one meal. I really don't feel like being in the same room as Mom right now." I understood, but I wasn't going to let him off that easy. I gave him a look.

"I'm bringing you up some food after dinner," I said sourly. He nodded.

"Okay. Great," he said smiling. I eyed him suspiciously and then walked out. I walked down into the kitchen and saw my mom and dad already at the table.

"Where's Drew?" my dad asked. I looked pointedly at Mom.

"He's not hungry."

Drew's POV

After dinner Adam brought me up food. I had no intention of eating it but I waited until I was sure the kitchen was empty. Then I snuck down and threw the food away. I put the dirty dish in the sink as evidence.

It wasn't just going to sit there while my life crumbled. I was so stressed with everything. I couldn't sleep, I couldn't eat, and I couldn't see Alli. That one sucked the most. I couldn't deal without Alli. I scrolled through my phone and found her contact. I decided it was now or never. I had to tell her sometime.

As the phone rang, I began to regret calling her. I didn't really have any other options though, because I wouldn't text her something like this and I wasn't allowed to see her.

"Hey babe," she said as she picked up. A lump formed in my throat. She was going to be pissed.

"Hi love," I said. "I have to talk to you." I mentally kicked myself. That's exactly the wrong thing to say!

"What's wrong?" she said nervously.

"Mom mom has forbidden me to see you, except for weekends, until I get my grades up." I knew she was going to be pissed. She might even break up with me.

"Awww, that sucks," she said. I was shocked. I'd expected a more angry answer.

"You're not mad?" I asked dumbfounded.

"No, I mean, yes, but I'm not going to make a big deal out of it. That's exactly what she wants." I could see Alli's point.

"You're right, but it sucks," I agreed.

"Obviously," she said. "Well I've gotta do homework. Bye Drew."

"Bye Alli," I said hanging up. Wow, that went well. Too bad the hardest part was yet to come.

Alli's POV

When I got off the phone with Drew, my feelings were an odd mix of awesome and terrible. I felt awesome because cheating would be so much easier. I felt terrible because Drew seemed upset and I was happy. He was my boyfriend, even if I planned to break his heart. I was a terrible person.

My master plan was almost complete. I was so close to finally breaking Drew's heart like he broke mine. I took another look at the battered list I made. On it were the steps of my plan.

Alli's Master Plan

Step 1) Get back together with Drew.

Step 2) Make him trust me.

Step 3) Make him fall in love with me.

Step 4) Cheat on him.

Step 5) Have him find out.

Step 6) Break Drew's heart.

The only thing left to do was have him find out. I had thought of many different scenarios but none of them seemed right. I could have Dave tell him, but then Dave would be suspicious. I could tell him, but he might find a way to be understanding. That wouldn't do. I could tell Clare. She was close with Drew. But Clare would probably insist I tell him myself. So that was out too. I guess I'd just keep brainstorming. I feel like next weekend, the one after this one, will be the best time to tell him. I just needed to come up with an idea before then and my plan would be perfectly executed.

I knew my plan would be a success, but I had a nagging feeling in my stomach. I knew it was wrong to do this and I knew it was cruel, but I had to. I had to get my revenge. I really did like Drew and part of me wanted to stay with him, but if I didn't do this I would feel like guys could control me. By doing this, I would show the world that Alli Bhandari can't be controlled by a guy. And she's not one to mess with.

I put on my girl empowerment CD and assured myself I was doing the right thing. Drew had started it so it was only fair I finish it. Right?


	20. Chapter 20

Drew's POV

It was Tuesday morning and I was walking to my locker. I saw Clare, Adam, and Eli walking and I waved. Clare and Adam smiled back and Eli nodded. Today was a pretty good day, well compared to last night. I skipped breakfast this morning, but it wasn't a big deal. I just wasn't hungry. Even so, I wanted to keep it from Adam. He'd flip.

I opened my locker and grabbed my books. I had homeroom with Mr. Armstrong. As soon as I walked in, Mr. Armstrong stopped me.

"Drew," he said in his no nonsense voice.

"Yeah, Mr. Armstrong?"

"Here's a pass to Mr. Simpson's office for 1st period." He handed me the pass and I took my seat next to Clare. Mr. Simpson was a really cool Principal, but he could be strict when he needed to be. Especially after Vegas Night. I wonder what I could be in trouble for.

"Hi Drew," Mr. Simpson said as I walked into his office. I looked around and saw all my teachers. I blanched. This couldn't be good.

"Hi," I said hesitantly.

"Drew, Your teacher and I want to talk to you. Your mom should be here any minute," he explained.

"My mom?" I asked nervously. She was going to be pissed. Just then she walked in and took a seat. She glared daggers at me.

"Drew, you're failing most of your classes. The only way you can move into grade 12 next year is if you get at least a B- on all your finals. Your teachers and I wanted to talk with you to see what we could do." I stared at them all blankly and took a seat. Didn't they understand I was hopeless?

"Drew, have you thought about getting a tutor?" Mr. Armstrong asked.

"A tutor? This kid needs a miracle worker," Mr. Perino said snidely.

"Dom!" Mr. Simpson exclaimed. "Drew," he said shifting the question back to me.

"K.C Guthrie has been tutoring me," I said.

"Ah, K.C is a very bright student," Mr. Simpson said.

"But it apparently isn't working," Mr. Perino pointed out.

"I think Wesley could be a great help to Drew," suggested Mr. Betenkamp. "What do you think, Drew?" he asked me. Wesley was nice to me so I didn't mind him tutoring me.

"Sounds good," I said quietly.

"Alright," Principal Simpson exclaimed. "We're good for chemistry. Now what about English?"

"Clare Edwards is my best student. She could help Drew," Mrs. Dawes suggested. I nodded. Clare was a good friend so I wouldn't mind her helping me.

"Clare's your friend, right Drew?" My mom asked. I nodded and smiled.

"There we go!" Mr. Simpson concluded. "Now all we need is history." Mr. Perino rolled his eyes.

"He's hopeless, Archie. I can't think of one student who could help him. He'll just have to come to summer school." I slumped in my seat. I was just so happy to have my teacher call me hopeless. In his defense, I really was. I'm just not able to learn.

"That's not true. I see potential in Drew. How about you tutor him?" My jaw dropped. Was Simpson out of his mind?

"No way. I'm not wasting my time. I'd rather teach a kindergartener." Mr. Perino crossed his arms over his chest. I turned red. Everyone knew I was dumb, but it still stung.

"I've uh got to get to class," I mumbled. "Thanks." I walked out and I heard Mr. Simpson call my name. I was done. This week was just getting worse and worse.

Wesley's POV

I was walking down the hall with Dave after 3rd period. It was Wednesday, almost the weekend. I couldn't wait. Our science Olympic team had a match on Sunday and we were a shoe-in to win. Dave thought science Olympics was dorky, but I loved it.

"So do you still have a crush on Anya?" Dave asked as she walked by. She looked like an angel. Her hair blew in the wind and I couldn't take my eyes off of her. "Wes?"

"Oh no. I'm over her," I lied trying to sound nonchalant.

"Okay Wes. Whatever," he muttered. Just then Drew came walking towards us. His expression was neutral. I noticed Dave visibly tense. He always felt guilty around Drew. I did too, even though I wasn't the one hooking up with his girlfriend.

"Hey Wesley," Drew said. He smiled. He had a perfect smile, which was really intimidating.

"Uh hi Drew," I stuttered.

"We're still studying after school, right?" My uncle had asked me to tutor Drew in chemistry. Drew needed at least a B- on the final to pass.

"Yeah," I said noticing a small cut on his arm. I wonder how he got that.

"Cool. See you then," he said as he walked away. When he was gone I heard Dave sigh.

"You're studying with Drew after school?" he asked. I nodded. "Cool. I guess Alli and I can hang out then." I frowned. I hated that Dave was still hooking up with Alli behind Drew's back.

"Dave, don't you feel terrible?" I asked. Drew was a nice guy who really loved his girlfriend and Dave was helping her cheat on him. How could he be so heartless?

"I do, man. But he and Alli are going to break up soon and then we won't have to hide anything." Dave could be so selfish.

"So, it doesn't matter. Alli is still cheating on Drew. What happens when he finds out? He's going to be crushed, not to mention furious at you. Do you have a death wish?"

"He's not going to find out," Dave insisted. I just rolled my eyes. Sooner or later, Dave and Alli's luck was going to run out and when it happened, they were going to pay the price.


	21. Chapter 21

Dave's POV

Alli and I had been making out for an hour. It was awesome. Even though we've made out many times before, I never get use to it. Kissing Alli is the best thing in the world. She was an even better kisser than I thought she would be.

"Water break," Alli giggled as she pulled away. We both got up off the couch and went into the kitchen. I sat at the table as I watched her dance around the kitchen grabbing cups and filling them with water. She looked so graceful. When she was done, I grabbed both cups and brought them to the coffee table in the living room.

"Very chivalrous," she smirked. I shrugged.

"That's me. Always chivalrous," I retorted.

"You're acting strangely like a boyfriend," she commented.

"What's so wrong about that?" I asked.

"Well, that occupation is currently filled. Remember Drew?" She joked.

"Ah. The boyfriend. Speaking of Drew, when does he become the ex?" I've been patient but Alli needs to break things off with Drew now.

"Soon, Dave. I told you. I don't want to hurt him," she explained for the millionth time.

"Well what happens if he finds out?" I said remembering my conversation with Wesley earlier that day.

"He won't," she insisted.

"But if he does, he'll hate me," I reminded her. "And you."

"Fine, I'll break up with him next week," she promised. I nodded.

"Now where were we?" she smiled and she leaned in for a kiss.

Clare's POV

"What's bugging you Adam?" I asked my friend. He seemed antsy. We were sitting on the picnic tables waiting for Eli and Fiona to join us. We ate outside every day since it was getting nice out.

"Grams is coming tomorrow," he said reluctantly. Adam had told his Grams about him being an FTM over the phone about a month ago and she had taken it pretty well. After the initial shock wore off, she was accepting.

"Why is that a bad thing?" I asked curiously.

"It's the first time she's going to see me as Adam and I don't know if I should introduce her to Fiona." I understood Adam now. He didn't want to overwhelm her with meeting her new grandson and his girlfriend.

"Then don't introduce her to Fiona," I suggested.

"I don't want Fi to get mad."

"Oh well. If you tell her I bet she'll understand," I said as Fiona and Eli strode our way. "Better decided quickly," I whispered. Adam turned to greet them.

"Hey guys. Late much?" he joked. Eli rolled his eyes and took his seat next to me while Fiona leaned in for a kiss.

"Sorry to keep my prince waiting," she said flirtatiously. The rest of lunch went as per usual.

Dave's POV

I was in the locker room changing for gym class. I had gym last period every Thursday. It was great because I loved gym and I didn't have to sit through a boring class at the end of the day. It sucked because Drew was in my gym class. I hated being around Drew. I felt so awkward. I listened to the typical locker room chatter.

"So Drew, how's that hot girlfriend of yours?" Owen asked jokingly. Drew rolled his eyes. Drew and Owen used to hate each other's guts but lately they've been getting along.

"She's good," he said smiling. You couldn't mistake the admiration in his voice. I felt terrible.

"So she didn't dump you yet?" Owen snickered. Drew playfully shoved him.

"Nope and I don't think it'll happen anytime soon," Drew said confidently. If only Drew knew Alli was planning to break up with him.

"You're hanging out with her tonight, right?" K.C asked.

"Yeah, I'd assume so. I haven't seen her since Monday," he said as he unbuttoned his flannel.

"I guess it sucks when Alli goes to school somewhere else," K.C said changing his shirt.

"You have no idea," Drew sighed, taking off his tee shirt. I'd never noticed how huge Drew was. His biceps flexed as he balled up his shirt and put it in his locker. He had a six-pack that made my abs looks like Jell-o. Drew couldn't find out about Alli and me. If he did, I'd be a dead man.

As everyone was finishing up, my phone rang. I grabbed it and checked it. It was a text from Alli. Her school got out before Degrassi, so she sometimes texted me during last period to confirm plans. I read the message.

Come to my house tonight ;)

"A text from your girlfriend?" Owen asked laughing. I tried to laugh along but on the inside I was shaking.

"Who's it from?" K.C asked. Oh no.

"No one," I lied. They saw through it.

"Something to hide?" Owen pressed. He reached for my phone.

"Guys," someone yelled. I noticed it was Drew. "Leave him alone. Besides, we're all going to be late. You know how Coach Armstrong gets." Everyone agreed and filed out of the locker room.

"Thanks man," I said to Drew when it was only K.C, Drew, and me.

"No worries," he said with a grin as him and K.C walked out. I quickly sent a reply to Alli.

What about Drew?

I dropped my phone on the bench and ran out into the gym.


	22. Chapter 22

K.C's POV

"K.C grabs some more basketballs from the locker room, will you?" Coach yelled from the other side of the gym.

"Sure thing, coach," I replied as I ran towards the locker room. I went into the back closet and located the extras bag of basketballs. I was just about to leave, when I heard a phone ring. I walked over to it and saw it was Dave's. I was really curious. Dave got defenses about his phone earlier when it went off. I wanted to know who he was texting but Drew told us to lay off. Now I was only a few seconds away from finding out.

No. I couldn't go through his phone. It wasn't right. I turned to walk away but turn back. I needed to know. I opened the phone and saw it was a message from Alli. What could Alli want? I opened it.

What my boyfriend doesn't know won't hurt him ;)

"What the-" I muttered to myself. I scrolled back through the messages and it finally hit me. Alli was cheating on Drew. I couldn't believe this. That bitch! After everything, she had the nerve to cheat on him. She knew how much he loved her and she knew how much it would kill him. I can't believe her!

"K.C," I heard Coach yell. I dropped the phone and picked up the basketballs.

"Coming," I yelled as I sprinted out of the locker room. I handed the balls to Coach and scanned the room for Drew. I needed to tell him. I saw him on the other side of the gym with Dave. The nerve of that guy to be around Drew! He was helping Drew's girlfriend cheat on him! Drew was always nice to him and even defended him in the locker room. How could Dave be so heartless? Plus Drew stood up for Dave today, unknowingly saving Dave from having his relationship with Alli revealed. I felt sick.

I began to run towards Drew when suddenly someone blocked my path: Jenna.

"K.C, I need to talk to you," she said. I looked around her at Drew.

"Not now, Jenna. I really need to talk to Drew," I said impatiently. My girlfriend frowned.

"K.C," she whined before Coach's yelling cut her off.

"Torres, you're being dismissed." Drew nodded and ran into the locker room. I turned to follow him but Jenna stopped me.

"What?" I snapped.

"I'm going out after school with the Power Squad. Then, I'm sleeping over Chantay's house," she explained slowly as I tapped my foot.

"What's the point?" I asked as Drew walked out of the locker room fully dressed. I started to run but Jenna held me back again.

"I have to talk to Drew," I yelled. She didn't let go and I couldn't push her off. I wasn't abusive.

"K.C I need you to watch the baby tonight," she said. Drew was getting closer to the door.

"Okay. I gotta go," I said running my words together. Jenna still didn't let go.

"Do you know how to get to the day care center?" she pressed. Briana stayed at day care of Tuesdays and Thursdays so Jenna and I could both come to school.

"Yes, Jenna I have to go!"

"Don't forget you also need to-" she continued.

"I have to go!" I yelled earning a lot of stares. I turned to run to Drew, only to see him gone. I ran to the door with the intention of following Drew down the hall.

"Guthrie!"Coach yelled. I sighed loudly and turned to face him. "Where do you think you're going?"

"I really need to talk to Drew. It's important," I said desperately.

"Well you can talk to him afterschool," he said signaling it was the end of our discussion. I sighed. I would have to text Drew as soon as possible.

Drew's POV

"Mom?" I asked as I saw her and Adam in the foyer of Degrassi.

"Hi Andrew. Ready to go?" she asked. Adam looked as confused as I did.

"Why are we leaving early?" I asked. She sighed.

"I was in a meeting and it just finished. Principal Simpson said I could take you two out early so I didn't have to come back." Adam and I looked at each other and shrugged. Leaving school early was never a bad thing.

We got in the car and started to drive home. We made small talk while I texted Alli. She said she had plans after school so we could hang out tonight. I might as well hang out with Adam until then.

"Adam, wanna watch a movie or play video games after school?" I asked.

"Sorry I'm hanging out with Fi. Speaking of, Mom can you drop me off at her condo?" my mom nodded. I sighed. I was going to be spending the afternoon alone.

K.C's POV 

After gym, I changed at top speed. I grabbed my stuff and sprinted into the hall. I stopped at my locker and shoved my books into my backpack. I slammed it shut and sped walked down the hall. I pulled out my phone and began to text Drew when I felt a hand clamp down on my shoulder. I turned around and my shoulders slumped.

"Mr. Guthrie, texting in school," Mr. Perino said meanly. He held out his hand. "Hand it over." There was no way I was giving him my phone.

"But it's afterschool," I argued.

"The rule is no phones in school. It doesn't specify when." Mr. Perino gave me a triumphant look.

"But I really need my phone. I'm sorry. I'll never text in school again if you could let me keep it this once," I pleaded, trying to negotiate. Mr. Perino was the meanest teacher at Degrassi and was known for being unreasonable.

"No can do," he said as he took it out of my hand.

"But Mr. Perino!"

"You can have a parent pick it up later," he said as he began to walk away. I groaned loudly. My mom would be pissed and now I'd have to run to Drew's house to talk to him. Well, after I picked Briana up from daycare.

"Dammit!"


	23. Chapter 23

Drew's POV

"Drew," my mom called as she walked into the kitchen. It was 5:00 and I was at home. Alli said she was busy afterschool and she'd call me to make plans later. It sucked that I only got to see her on weekends. I'm going to sneak out to see her tonight, though.

"Yeah?" I said glaring. She sighed.

"Andrew, seriously. I have to tell you something." I waited for her to continue. "Grams is coming for dinner on Friday night."

"Does Adam know?" I asked. Adam told Grams a few weeks ago but she has yet to meet him.

"Yes. I told him this morning."

"Thanks for telling me," I said sarcastically. She rolled her eyes. "Wait," I said suddenly. "I have plans Friday." Alli and I were going out for dinner and a movie.

"Cancel them," Mom said simply. Didn't she understand I had a life of my own? She couldn't control everything.

"I can't. I never get to see Alli," I argued. The front door opened and I faintly heard Adam and Fiona.

"Grams is more important than that awful girl. I can't believe you're still dating her," my mom said disgustedly. My jaw dropped.

"Don't talk about my girlfriend like that!" I yelled. It seemed as if my mom and I were fighting a lot more often. Adam cleared his throat and I saw him and Fiona in the door way.

"Sorry to interrupt," Adam said.

"Oh, it's fine. Drew and I were just talking." I scoffed. She was unbelievable. "Fiona, it's so nice to see you," my mom cooed. She loved Fiona.

"Nice to see you too Mrs. Torres," Fiona said politely.

"Is Fiona coming to dinner Friday night?" I asked absent mindedly. Adam immediately glared at me. What's his problem?

"I don't see why not? I'm sure Grams would love to meet Fiona," Mom seconded. Of course Fiona could come. Fiona was apex of class and honor in my mother's eyes.

"I'd love too," Fiona said smiling. Adam frowned.

"I don't know if that the best idea," he said. Fiona gave him a questioning look.

"Why not?" my mom asked.

"I just don't think-" Adam said before Fiona cut him off.

"You know what; I think I have plans that night anyway," Fiona rushed. "And I actually should be going. Bye Adam," she said awkwardly. She kissed him on the cheek and turned back to my mom and I. "Bye Mrs. Torres, Drew." Without another word, she left.

Fiona's POV

For whatever reason Adam didn't want me at dinner. I knew his Grams meant a lot to him so I thought he'd want me to meet her. Meeting the family is a big step in a relationship but I thought we were ready. After all, I introduced him to my parents and Declan, and they came all the way from New York.

I walked down the Torres's street before I called my new driver, Henry. I sat down on the curb as I waited for him to pick me up. I began to wonder why Adam wouldn't want me to be at dinner. Maybe he was ashamed or embarrassed of me. That was the only explanation I could think of. Maybe he was afraid that she wouldn't approve of my parents or my crazy past. I was known as the crazy, rich bitch who kissed her twin brother. No wonder Adam didn't want me to meet Grams.

Drew's POV

Adam stared longingly at Fiona's retreating figure. When the door closed, he snapped around to face me, his face contorted in anger.

"What the hell Drew?" Adam yelled. I flinched.

"What are you talking about?" I asked, keeping my voice in check. I wasn't in the mood for a screaming match.

"Why did you bring up Grams in front of Fiona?" He was definitely pissed but I had no idea why.

"I didn't think it would be a big deal," I said defensively. I gave him a confused look.

"That's right! You didn't think! You never do! That's why you do so many stupid things, like cheating on your girlfriend," he screamed while violently moving his hand. That was a low blow and Adam knew it. I knew I was stupid. He didn't need to throw it in my face. Especially not by bringing up by biggest, most regretted mistake.

"I'm sorry, Adam. I didn't mean to-"

"You never mean to mess things up, but you always do. You screw everything up. My life would be better without a brother like you!" I stood there emotionlessly as Adam stormed out of the house. Adam was right. I did screw everything up. Maybe it'd be a better place without me.

"Drew, where are you going?" my mom asked as I headed for the door.

"To see Alli," I said, I put my hand on the doorknob and felt my mother's hand on my shoulder.

"I don't want you seeing that girl," she said curtly. I grew angry. Did we have to have this argument every day?

"'That girl'," I said harshly, "is my girlfriend and I love her. So leave her alone."

"But Drew," she argued.

"Shut up!" I knew she was fuming mad.

"For once, Andrew, can you try to be obedient?"

"Sorry I'm not the perfect son! Okay? I'm sorry you're so ashamed of me!"

"All I want is a nice family, but you ruin everything! Why can't you be more like Adam?"

I'd had enough. I stormed out the door and went sprinting down the driveway. I turned left. I knew how to get to Alli's house, but it was far. I continued to run until I couldn't run anymore. I stopped in the park and collapsed, sobbing. I cried about my terrible grades and my disappointed teachers. I cried about my fight with Adam and all the times I wasn't there for him. I cried about my mom and the fact that she was ashamed of me. I cried about all the mistakes I've made and all the things I've screwed up. Lastly, I cried about how worthless I was.

People in the park gawked at me until I finally stopped crying. I picked myself up and started to walk. I just needed to get to Alli's house. Alli would make everything okay. She always did.


	24. Chapter 24

K.C's POV

It was 5:25 any my mom finally came home. I'd been taking care of Bree since picked her up from daycare after school. I tried to give her all my attention but my thoughts kept straying. All I'd been thinking about was Drew. And Alli. And Dave.

"Mom, watch Bree please. I need to run to Drew's. Oh and pick up my phone from school when you get the chance," I asked as I put my sneakers on.

"Alright, but come home soon," she called as I ran out the door. It was only 3 blocks to Drew's house so it wouldn't take me to long to get there.

When I finally got to Drew's, I frantically ran the doorbell. After a minute, Mrs. Torres answered the door.

"K.C," she said pleasantly as she opened the door. Mrs. Torres actually like me for some reason.

"Hi Mrs. Torres, May I speak to Drew?" I asked hurriedly. I had no time to waste.

"Drew's not home. He stormed out about 10 minutes ago," she said calmly. Why was she being so calm? Couldn't she tell this is urgent?

"Do you know where he is?" I rushed, asking the obvious follow up question.

"On his way to Alli's," she said in an annoyed tone. If he was already on his way, I wouldn't be able to catch up with him. I paced on the doorstep until an idea hit me.

"May I used you're phone?"

"Of course," she said ushering me in. I walked into the house quickly and made my way to the phone. I dialed Drew's number. They phone rang and rang until it finally went to voice mail. Ugh! How was I supposed to get in touch with him now?

"Can you have Drew call me when he gets home?" I said dejectedly. I had failed yet again. Why did the world hate me today?

"Sure K.C," she replied giving me a concerned look. I brushed it off and said goodbye. I left the Torres's house and started to walk back home, hoping Dave wasn't with Alli.

Drew's POV

My phone rang in my hand. I saw it was my house phone. I hit ignore. I didn't want to talk to anyone at home. My family members all hated me, so why put up with more mean comments. They made it quite clear already that they didn't want me in their life. I sighed. I was almost at Alli's. Then, I hoped, everything would be alright. Maybe I could crash at K.C's tonight if I still didn't want to go home.

A few minutes later, I arrived at the Bhandari's front door. I knocked tentatively, hoping Alli's parents weren't home. Luckily, Sav opened the door.

"Hey Drew," he said with a smile. I smiled back.

"Is Alli home?" I asked. I prayed she was.

"Yeah, I think. I just got home from a student council meeting," he blushed. I smirked. Everyone knew Sav and Holly J did a lot more than talk about Degrassi at their student council meetings. "But she should be in her room. You can go right up."

"Thanks man," I said taking off my shoes and heading up the stairs. I walked down the hallway until I came to Alli's door. It was slightly ajar so I knocked once and walked in. As soon as I stepped into her room, I froze in place. Oh my god.

"Drew!" Alli exclaimed as she climbed off Dave. I took in the scene. Alli was standing there with a guilty look on her face. She was in just a lacey black bra and short black shorts. Dave was lying on Alli's bed, the bed that they had just been making out on, in only a pair of jeans. His belt and shirt were on the floor, along with Alli's shirt.

"What's going on?" I asked in an emotionless voice. I realized how ridiculous the question sounded. Alli and Dave had obviously been making out. I couldn't believe Alli was cheating on me.

"Drew, I can explain," Dave said. Alli glared at him.

"Don't," she said. "Let me. You see Drew, Dave and I were just making out. He's a good kisser you know. I'm not sure if he's as good as you but…" she trailed off.

"How long have you been cheating on me?" I asked quietly. I felt like I had lost my voice.

"We've been hooking up for about 3 weeks. You've been so busy so it was quite easy. Well, until now." When she finished, I stood there motionlessly. I couldn't believe she'd been cheating on me for so long. How could I be so clueless?

"But why?" I asked, pain showing through my voice. I had no idea how I looked, but if it was anything close to how I felt, I must've looked awful.

"Because, you're worthless to me Drew. You never meant a single thing to me. Every word I said was a lie. Do you really think any girl could love a guy like you? I mean seriously. To say you're not the smartest guy ever would be a sever understatement. That's why it was easy. You're so gullible and naïve. And let's be honest Drew, what could a girl see in you?" Alli cocked her eyebrow. Her words hit me like a wall of bricks. I felt my face contort in pain, even though I was trying my hardest not to show how much her words had hurt. Alli really hit home. Everything she said was true. Why had I been denying it? Everything Adam and my mom said was true, too. Alli confirmed it; Life really would be better for everyone if mine stopped.

"I have to go," I said almost inaudibly. I turned to leave, but Alli pulled me back.

"You're honestly upset?" she yelled cruelly. I could feel my self control slipping as tears forming in my eyes. "Drew you're completely and utterly worthless, I thought you'd know that by now. Ha! Did you really think I'd actually like a guy like you? Please! I could do a million times better," she sneered at me in disgust. Without saying another word, I ran out of her room. I faintly heard Alli laughing.

I ran down stairs with tears in my eyes. I blew past Sav without a word and ran out the door. Once I got onto the street. I dropped on my knees and broke down. I felt my whole entire life shatter.


	25. Chapter 25

Alli's POV

Dave and I had been making out, like usual. But things went a little further than they usually did. Unlike when I was making out with Drew, it wasn't effortless. It didn't feel right. I had to think about what I was doing. With Drew, I just went with what felt right.

In the back of my head, I knew I really cared about Drew. I might not love him, but I liked him a lot. I wondered if revenge was really the best. The thing with Bianca happened a long time ago and Drew has showed me time and time again how sorry he was. I heard that besides Clare, he didn't talk to or look at other girls, which is very unlike him. It just showed how committed he was to me. Maybe I should break things off with Dave…

I was so deep in thought, that I didn't hear anything until the door swung open. Dave and I both turned and saw a completely flabbergasted Drew in the doorway. As soon as he'd seen us, he'd stopped in his tracks. His eyes opened wide as I scrambled off Dave.

"Drew!" I squeaked. I watched as Drew took in the room before him. His expression turned from one of shock, to one of horror.

"What's going on?" he asked with a glazed over, emotionless expression. I realized I no longer had a choice. Drew was going to be hurt no matter what. The question was, do I get my revenge or plead for forgiveness?

"Drew, I can explain," Dave said timidly. I decided I might as well get my revenge. I glared at Dave. I would have to give one hell of a performance to really hurt Drew.

"Don't. Let me," I said in my bitchiest tone. "You see Drew, Dave and I were just making out. He's a good kisser you know. I'm not sure if he's as good as you but…" I trailed off smugly.

"How long have you been cheating on me?" he asked in a pitiful voice. I internally cringed, but didn't let my guilt show.

"We've been hooking up for about 3 weeks. You've been so busy so it was quite easy. Well, until now."

"But why?" he said painfully. His expression was truly heart breaking. I'd never seen someone in that must pain. His pain somehow made me want to be meaner. I couldn't let him think I felt bad.

"Because, you're worthless to me Drew. You never meant a single thing to me. Every word I said was a lie. Do you really think any girl could love a guy like you? I mean seriously. To say you're not the smartest guy ever would be a sever understatement. That's why it was easy. You're so gullible and naïve. And let's be honest Drew, what could a girl see in you?" I knew every word coming out of my mouth was a lie. Drew was a great guy and an amazing boyfriend. I took one look into his eyes and I knew he believed every word I said.

"I have to go," he whispered. He turned to leave.

"You're honestly upset?" she cackled. He looked back at me and his eyes shone with tears. I was a monster. "Drew you're completely and utterly worthless, I thought you'd know that by now. Ha! Did you really think I'd actually like a guy like you? Please! I could do a million times better." I almost lost my cool as he walked out the door. I laughed cruelly when he was gone. I'd done it. I'd finally gotten my revenge on Drew. And it felt great… I think.

Dave's POV

Alli was laughing as Drew ran out. I faintly heard the front door slam. Drew had caught Alli and me making out. She had been really cruel to him. I knew she wasn't into him anymore, but she didn't have to be so terrible. I saw his face contort in pain as he realized what happened. The agony in his eyes was unmistakable. I, along with 95% of the school, was used to seeing Drew totally in control with his emotions. Seeing Drew in so much pain made everything suddenly clear to me. Drew was a real person with real feelings. He wasn't just a name or a stereotype. Alli cheating on him caused him pain. I had caused him pain. Wesley was right. Finding out had completely destroyed Drew. I knew it would but I never cared about anyone but myself until now. Drew had feelings; feelings that I had just crushed. I couldn't have felt guiltier.

"Hey what's going on?" Sav asked as he walked into Alli's room. Everyone stood motionlessly as Sav surveyed the room.

"Drew and I broke up," Alli said finally. Sav raised his eyebrows but nodded.

"Alright. Well, I have student counsel stuff to do. See ya," he said awkwardly as he slowly backed out the door. After a beat of silence Alli walked over to me and smiled.

"Let's get back to where we were before," she said pulling me into a kiss. I pulled away.

"Don't you feel guilty?" I asked her. She thought about it for a second before answering.

"Not anymore. I'm single now, Dave. We can do whatever we want with feeling guilty. I won't be cheating on Drew anymore." I couldn't disagree with her logic. It made perfect sense, but it still felt wrong.

"Well that's true," I amended. She smiled and pulled me in for another kiss. We continued from where we left off before.

Adam's POV

After I stormed out of the house, I caught up with Fiona. We had a long talk and worked everything out. I explained to her why I hadn't brought up dinner with Grams. She got to see my point of view and understood why I acted the way I did. We weren't done discussing everything, but we were done fighting. The rest we could work out together.

Fiona and I strode hand in hand to the Dot. I texted Clare to tell her and Eli to meet us there. When Clare had asked why, I simply told her I had a fight with Drew. The details could wait until I saw them in person.

"So how bad was your fight with Drew?" Fiona asked as we walked. I grimaced.

"Pretty bad," I said truthfully. I had been beyond angry at him after Fiona left. "I said a lot of things I didn't mean. I was just so mad."

"What did you say?" she asked not masking her concern.

"I told him that he was a stupid and that my life would be better without him in it," I said, shamefully looking down at my shoes.

"Maybe you should call him," she suggested. I shook my head.

"He's probably pissed at me. I'd be best to talk to him in person when I get home," I argued. Fiona looked unsure but agreed anyway. She really was the perfect girlfriend. What would I do without her?


	26. Chapter 26

Drew's POV

I don't see the point in living any longer. I am of no use to anyone. I deserve to die. I should die. Better yet, I should kill myself. Make life easier for everyone I know. Adam would be happy he doesn't have a brother to mess up his life and make it hell. I really tired to be a good brother to Adam, but I always failed. He deserved better than me. My mom would also be glad if I wasn't around. Who wanted a dumb, useless son? Not her, oh not her at all. She was ashamed of me in every way and would be glad to be rid of me. My teachers would throw a party. They're all sick of failing me. They called me worthless, everyone did; and after a while I began to believe them.

Lastly there was Alli. I would kill myself for her. I tried so hard to be the perfect boyfriend, but I apparently failed because she cheated on me with someone else. I was tremendously hurt to find that out. I've never felt that much pain before. I could see why she did it, though. She deserved so much better than me. Everything she'd said was true. The worst part about this whole thing was, I couldn't blame her. I had done the same to her once before. It was the biggest mistake of my life, but karma got me back. I couldn't complain. I bet the only reason Alli got back together with me was because she saw me as a pity case with no one else. I really was all alone. I just made people's lives miserable so to stop this; I would end mine.

I decided to call Clare. Maybe she could help me or at the very least I could say goodbye. She was the reason I had begun to get better. She was so kind and caring. She was the best friend I had ever known. I didn't deserve such a good friend. I dialed Clare's number. It rang and rang until it went to voice mail. The phone beeped and I began to leave my message.

"Hey Clare. It's Drew. I really needed someone to talk to. Everything is so messed up. Adam's mad at me, as you probably know. I didn't mean to make him mad. I really didn't. I was just being stupid. My mom is also mad at me. Not mad, but ashamed, like always. My teachers all think I'm hopeless. Nothing I do, school wise and other wise, is ever good enough. But, that's nothing new, right Clare? I've talked to you about all these things before. You always gave the best advice, but things are different this time. I just went to talk to Alli. Sav let me in and I went to her room. I walked in on her making out with Dave. Alli's been cheating on me, Clare. I don't blame her, though, I blame myself. I really tired to be a good boyfriend, but I failed. I drove her to cheat. She said I was worthless to her. She said that she could never love a guy like me. I realized no one could. That's why I'm going to end my life. Trust me, Clare. It'll make everyone's lives easier without me there to screw everything up. Trust me, Clare. It'll make everyone's lives easier without me there to screw everything up. Clare, this isn't your fault, trust me. Thanks for putting up with me for so long and I hope you live your life to the fullest because it has value, Clare. Your life is the most valuable thing I know of. So, to wrap this up, can you please tell Adam that I love him more than anyone and that I will miss him so much. Tell him I'm sorry. Please tell K.C that he was the greatest best friend I could ask for and he is a great dad. Briana is lucky to have him. Finally, tell Alli that I really do love her. I love her more than words can describe. I know you're probably confused at why I still love her, but I do. Thanks for everything, Clare. You changed my life for the better. You're like the sister I never had. I love you." I hung up and continued to walk down the street. _Now, how should I go about killing myself? _

Clare's POV

I was in the car with Eli. We were going to the Dot to meet Fiona and Adam. Adam said he wanted to talk to us about something. All we knew was that he and Drew were in a fight about something. Adam said he'd explain at the Dot. Dead Hand was playing from the stereo, but softly. Eli drove with one hand, his other hand intertwined in mine. I watched him as we drove down Alli's street.

"I love you," I said suddenly.

"I love you, too," he replied without missing a beat.

"So what do you think Adam and Drew are fighting about?" I asked, trying to make conversation.

"Probably something Drew did," Eli replied, his eyes still on the road. I knew Drew better than Eli did so it was natural that he would blame him. I didn't think Drew would've done anything to Adam, but I couldn't be sure.

"I don't think so. I think it has to do with their mom or something," I mused. I saw Eli smirk.

"Of course it wasn't Drew's fault. He's such a saint," Eli said sarcastically. I smacked his arm lightly.

"You can be quiet," I said. Drew wasn't the guy everyone thought he was. Everyone thought he was a cocky, egotistical jock. I knew he wasn't. He was a caring, sweet, and loving. People began to see that side of him when he started dating Alli again, but Eli refused to be swayed from his first impression.

"Your wish it my command, blue eyes," he retorted. My phone started to vibrate. I checked it and Drew was calling.

"Speak of the Devil," I said as I hit ignore. I would call him back later. It would be rude to answer when I was with Eli.

"Drew's calling you?" Eli said in a slightly controlled voice. It was just like Eli to get jealous.

"Yeah, I'll call him back later," I said judging his reaction. He seemed calm. A minute later, my phone rang again and I looked down at it. I had one new voice message. I also saw the time.

"Eli," I exclaimed. "It's 5:58. We told Adam we'd be there at 6:00. I don't want them to have to wait for us." I hated being late.

"Oh crap," he said as he started to speed up. We were about 4 or 5 minutes from the Dot. Eli kept speeding up. I wondered mildly what the speed limit was. We turned the corner a little too fast and I saw something leap in front of the hearse.

"Eli," I screeched but it was too late. I heard something hit the car. Eli must've braked at some point because the car was suddenly still. The airbags opened, blocking my view. I heard a car door open. It must've been Eli's.

"Shit!" I heard Eli's voice for the first time. I wondered what we'd hit. "Clare, call 911!" I grabbed my phone from my pocket as I struggled to step out of the car.

"Eli what's-" I suddenly stopped, noticing what, or actually whom, we'd hit. We'd hit Drew. I saw as his bloody body mangled in the street. My breath caught for a second. Eli ran over to me and ripped the phone out of my hand. Time seemed to stop. I faintly heard Eli talking to the dispatcher.

I ran over to Drew's body, noticing for the first time I was sobbing. There was blood everywhere but I didn't care. I kneeled down next to his head. It was bleeding. His eyes were shut but he was breathing.

"Drew, wake up," I cried. "Drew please, Drew wake up. Please Drew." I started sobbing so hard I could barely breathe. I felt Eli's arm around me.

"Clare, calm down. It's okay. Drew's going to be okay. The paramedics are coming. Shh, calm down," Eli cooed into my ear. I couldn't respond. I just continued to sob. Everything else was a blur. I heard Eli's voice calling Adam, police sirens, an ambulance, and paramedics. Lastly I heard Adam's voice. He was crying more than I was. Then all the noise was gone. The ambulance pulled way, the police left, and the road was clear except for a bloody hearse, Eli, Fiona, Adam, and I. We all silently got in the car and drove to the hospital. This couldn't be happening.

Adam's POV

Fiona and I were in the car and we were driving to Eli and Clare. Eli just called me on the phone. He sounded really upset. I was sitting in the Dot with Fiona waiting for Eli and Clare. They were late. It wasn't like Clare to be late. Then my phone rang. I remember the phone conversation exactly.

*Flashback*

"Adam, you-you need to get over here. Quickly. Something terrible happened. The-the cops are on their way. I'm so sorry, Adam. I didn't mean to," Eli was wailing into the phone. I was really confused.

"Eli! Eli! Where are you? What happened? Is everything okay with Clare?" Fiona gave me a curious look. I was really worried. Eli usually didn't get so worked up about things.

"I'm a block away from the Dot. On the corner. I-I got into a car accident. I didn't mean to. I was speeding. To-to meet you and Fiona. I'm so sorry, Adam. I didn't mean to." He sounded half crazed. I heard Clare crying in the background.

"Is Clare okay?" I asked quickly.

"Yes. She's fine. We both are." My brows furrowed.

"Then what's wrong?"

"I- I hit," Eli was struggling to find words. "I hit Drew," he choked. "Adam I'm so sorry." I was in shock. Eli hit Drew.

"I'm on my way," I yelled into the phone. I hung up and looked at Fiona.

*End of Flashback*

I ran to Morty with tears in my eyes. There were police cars everywhere. The ambulance was flashing and the siren stung my ears. I took in the scene in front of me. There was blood all over the road and on Eli's car. I saw Clare, covered in blood, hysterically crying. The last thing I saw was a bloody Drew being carried away on a stretcher. My breath caught as they took him away. I suddenly realized how serious this accident was. I started to hyperventilate. Fiona tried to console me, but I was so upset. As soon as I saw Eli, I broke down in hysteric sobs.

"Adam, I'm so sorry," Eli said his face contorting in pain. "This is all my fault. I'm so stupid. Speeding kills people all the time." I looked up when he said the word kills. I started to cry harder.

"Crap. Adam, I didn't mean it that way. I'm sorry." I nodded, still crying. The cops pulled away and soon the ambulance left too. The only people left were Clare, Eli, Fiona, and I. We all piled into the bloody hearse and drove to the hospital.


	27. Chapter 27

Eli's POV

We had been at the hospital for a half an hour. I sat next to Clare with Fiona next to me. Adam was pacing and calling his parents and some of Drew's friend. Mr. and Mrs. Torres were on their way. A few people had come in after us. First was K.C. He looked awful. He ran in and fervently asked Clare and I what had happened. Clare was still sobbing so I filled him in. He had taken a seat on the other side of Clare. Riley and Zane had come in shortly after. They both had seemed so concerned. I didn't know that they knew Drew well. A little while ago they decided to walk around for a while. The waiting room was so still the tension was almost suffocating. It felt like Julia all over again.

Julia. Something about this situation felt too much like last time. Sitting in the waiting room, wondering. About 2 year ago Julia got hit by a car and died. Because of me. Because we got into a stupid fight and she rode her bike off into the night. Julia was dead because of me. Sitting here now, I feel the same emotions I felt that night. I didn't feel as bad because Drew wasn't my girlfriend. I didn't love him more than anything. But still. The two scenarios were the same. The only difference was this time I'd been the person driving the car. If Drew dies, I'll never be able to forgive myself. He can't die. I can't deal with another death on my conscience.

I looked around the room and suddenly remembered something. I had Clare's cell phone in my pocket. I remembered Drew had called Clare right before the accident. I was hoping he had left a message. I dug through my pocket and found the phone. I flipped it open so violently I thought I'd snap it in half. On the bottom of the screen it indicated that Clare had one voice message. I stood up quickly and saw that K.C, Clare, Fiona, and Adam were all looking at me.

"Clare," I said quickly. "Remember Drew called you?"

"Yes," she said slowly in a hoarse voice.

"Check your voice mail," I said impatiently handing her the phone. She looked at me for a second and final everything clicked for her.

"Yes," she hissed as she dialed her voicemail. She put the phone on speaker and we all crowded around to hear the message.

"Hey Clare. It's Drew. I really needed someone to talk to. Everything is so messed up. Adam's mad at me, as you probably know. I didn't mean to make him mad. I really didn't. I was just being stupid. My mom is also mad at me. Not mad, but ashamed, like always. My teachers all think I'm hopeless. Nothing I do, school wise and other wise, is ever good enough. But, that's nothing new, right Clare? I've talked to you about all these things before. You always gave the best advice, but things are different this time. I just went to talk to Alli. Sav let me in and I went to her room. I walked in on her making out with Dave. Alli's been cheating on me, Clare. I don't blame her, though, I blame myself. I really tired to be a good boyfriend, but I failed. I drove her to cheat. She said I was worthless to her. She said that she could never love a guy like me. I realized no one could. That's why I'm going to end my life. Trust me, Clare. It'll make everyone's lives easier without me there to screw everything up. Clare, this isn't your fault, trust me. Thanks for putting up with me for so long and I hope you live your life to the fullest because it has value, Clare. Your life is the most valuable thing I know of. So, to wrap this up, can you please tell Adam that I love him more than anyone and that I will miss him so much. Tell him I'm sorry. Please tell K.C that he was the greatest best friend I could ask for and he is a great dad. Briana is lucky to have him. Finally, tell Alli that I really do love her. I love her more than words can describe. I know you're probably confused at why I still love her, but I do. Thanks for everything, Clare. You changed my life for the better. You're like the sister I never had. I love you."

After the message ended, we all stood motionlessly. For a minute no one talked or said anything. K.C's head fell into his hands. Clare started to cry again. Adam was as still as a statue and Fiona got up to hug him. I, on the other hand, got up. I needed to escape the morbid scene. I walked out into the hall way and broke down. I had never known Drew was the way he was. I remembered his eating disorder and Clare always talked about him like he had a problem but I had never known the extent of his inner thoughts. I considered killing myself once, after Julia. I could imagine what Drew was going through. I felt so bad for never knowing how he felt. Maybe I could've helped him. Slowly I walked back into the waiting room.

"I could've stopped him," I heard Clare wail. K.C was awkwardly comforting her. I took my seat and put my arms around her.

"Clare, that's not true," I said trying to calm her. Adam and Fiona sat down on the other side of me.

"I could have! He called me because he was upset and I ignored it! I could've talked him out of it." She somehow began to cry harder. Her whole body trembled as I held her.

"Clare it's not your fault. It's Alli's. She might've killed him! She-she-she-" Adam began to sob. He cried uncontrollably. Riley and Zane came back and I played them the message. They were both very shocked and agreed Alli was horrible.

"So Adam," I asked. "Why were you and Drew fighting?" Adam was still crying.

"He suggested Grams meet Fiona. Fiona was okay with it but I was really scared. She still isn't 100% comfortable with me being Adam and I don't want to overwhelm her. Fiona got upset because she thought I didn't want her to meet Grams. When she left I started screaming at Drew." He paused to take a deep breath. "I said things I didn't mean. I said he was stupid and that my life would be better if he wasn't in it." Adam began to cry harder. "He-he tried to kill himself. I was so mean to him. It's all my fault." Fiona comforted him.

"It's not your fault, Adam. Don't think it's your fault. He was going to talk to Alli after your fight. If she would've comforted him and let him talk to her, Drew would've been fine. You guys would've made up tonight. But Alli made everything worse. It's her fault Adam, not yours."

"It's my fault, also," K.C said suddenly. Everyone turned to look at him.

"What?" I asked.

"I said it's my fault, too," he said more loudly.

"What do you-"

"I knew Alli was cheating on him. I found out during gym. I was on my way to tell him when Jenna stopped me. Then Coach said he was being dismissed early. I tried to run after him but Coached yelled. After gym, I was about to send him a text when Mr. Perino took the phone. He said my mom would have to pick it up because there were no phones allowed in school. After school, I picked up Briana and took care of her. My mom came home at like 5:20 and I ran to Drew's house to tell him. He wasn't home, but Mrs. Torres said I could call him. I did but he didn't pick up. If I had told him, he would still be okay," K.C said shaking by this time. Clare comforted him.

"You did everything you could, K.C. Don't blame yourself," she said softly. K.C just nodded.

Mr. and Mrs. Torres came after a while. Adam played them the message for them. Mrs. Torres seemed really mad at Alli, but also really mad at herself. She told us she had been yelling at Drew when he left for Alli's. Like Adam, she said a lot of things she didn't mean. It could've been their last conversation ever. Mrs. Torres was crying, something that shocked us all, and Mr. Torres led her away. They sat on the opposite side of the room. At about 10 pm a doctor came out and took Mr. and Mrs. Torres through the doors. It was 10:30 and they were still in there.

"I wish we knew something, anything," K.C muttered. We all nodded in agreement. "He could be," K.C's voice cracked, "dying right now."

"I hate Alli," Adam hissed darkly. I didn't know Alli very well but I hated her right now, too. I can't believe she would do something like that. She knew about his problems, more than I knew, and she still did that. "I hate myself, too."

"Don't say that," I said darkly. We might've lost one Torres tonight. I'll be damned if we lose another.

"I contributed to this. I caused it," he insisted.

"No you didn't," Fiona said, leading him over to the vending machine. Adam was still torturing himself.

Less than a minute later, Mr. and Mrs. Torres came out. Adam got up and walked over to them. The rest of us watched with anticipation. My eyes never left Adam. As he listened, he began to cry. His father and mother comforted him. I looked at Clare.

"So do you think it's good news or bad news?" I asked. At this point, I wasn't sure. It had to be pretty bad for him to be in there all this time. But maybe he was going to be okay.

"I have no idea," Clare whispered as Adam made his way back over to us. Riley, Zane, K.C, and Fiona came near Clare and me. Adam stopped in front of me and sat down.

"Any news?" Fiona asked in a concerned voice. Adam nodded.

"Drew just got out of emergency surgery." Adam looked down and took a deep breath. "His right leg and hip are broken as well as his right shoulder. He also has a few broken ribs."

"Is that all?" Fiona pressed. She was probably the only one who could questions without making Adam upset.

"No," he said sadly.

"What else?" K.C asked. His knuckles were white as he gripped the arm of his chair.

"He hit his head hard. There was bleeding and a lot of damage." Adam's voice began to shake. "He-he slipped into a coma." He began to cry again. Clare also began to cry. Fiona and I comforted our loved ones but to no avail.

"Can we visit?" Clare asked. I could hardly understand her. Adam sniffled and the crying began to slow.

"He's in ICU. They said we can visit him tomorrow. But he could be in a coma for a few days or a few weeks or even a few years. No one knows." The news really hit me. Drew could still die. He might never wake up and even if he does wake up, it could be years.

"I think I'm going to stay the night," K.C said.


	28. Chapter 28

Clare's POV

Drew's hospital room was very plain. It had white walls, white sheets, white floor, and white chair. The only things not white were the stainless steel bed and the machines. At least he had a window.

Adam and I were with Drew while K.C and Eli ate breakfast. The doctor said Drew might be able to hear us so Adam's been prattling about nothing since we got in. He's been talking about sports mostly. More specifically how Drew's favorite teams are doing. He also talked about movies, video games, comics, even though Drew wasn't into the kind of stuff. Adam offered to leave so I could talk to him but I had nothing to say to Drew. I just kept hoping he'd wake up.

"Adam," I called quietly.

"Yeah Clare," he asked curiously.

"I'm scared." I whispered looking at the ground.

"So am I," he agreed soberly.

"What if he doesn't wake up?" I wasn't sure if Adam had heard me.

"He will Clare. He has to. He can't die, Clare. He needs to be alive. He needs to wake up and get help and then he can be the normal Drew. He needs to Clare." Adam rambled on while looking at Drew. It sounded like he was talking more to himself than to me.

"I just want him to be healthy and happy again," I said. It was the truest thing I'd said in a long time.

"Me too Clare."

I suddenly thought of Alli. She had no idea yet. I wanted to be the one to tell her. I think Adam would kill her if he saw her, and most other people would too. Alli is my best friend, or should I say was my best friend, and I think I should tell her. I was extremely mad and I would probably start screaming at her, but I, Saint Clare, was probably going to be the nicer to her than anyone else.

"Adam, I want to tell Alli," I said. Adam balled his hands into fists when I said her name but he nodded.

"Call her during her lunch," he suggested. I had a better idea.

"I'll have Eli drive me over to her school so I can tell her in person." Adam nodded and began to talk to Drew again.

"Wait, Adam." He looked at me again. "Drew used to cut himself," I blurted out. I couldn't help it. I needed to tell him, before it ate me alive.

"He what?" Adam asked. I couldn't tell what emotions he was feeling.

"He used to cut himself with a razor. I knew he did it once but then he told me he would stop. He made me promise not to tell anyone. I don't know if he's done it since I saw him. I already told your mom." I felt guilty for keeping a secret from Adam and for breaking a promise to Drew.

"Where?" he asked. I walked over to Drew and pulled up the hospital gown sleeve. I saw more cuts. My heart dropped.

"Right here."

Adam's POV

Finding out that Drew cut made me feel even worse. How could I have not noticed? I must be the worst brother in the history of the world. I excused myself from Clare as soon as I saw the cuts and ran into this bathroom. I looked in the mirror and broke down. How could I have not noticed?

Anya's POV

"I wonder what the assembly is going to be about," I said to Riley and Zane, my two best friends. I looked at them and they both shifted in their seats uncomfortable. We were sitting in the auditorium waiting for Holly J, Sav, and Principal Simpson to make an announcement.

"I have an idea," Riley said.

"What?" I asked hesitantly.

Ten minutes later, Riley and Zane were finished explaining. I was so shocked. I hadn't known much about Drew, but I felt so bad for him. To walk in on his girlfriend cheating on him must've been terrible. Also, to have all the problems he had. I know many people blame him for cheating on Alli, but from what Zane and Riley said, he learned from it and felt terrible about it. My heart ached to think that he had been so down he wanted to die. My eyes began to tear.

"Anya, are you alright?" Zane asked. Before I could answer Principal Simpson walked onto the stage. I couldn't listen to it again. I needed to get out of here. I grabbed Zane and Riley's hands and I ran out of the auditorium.

"Where are we going?" Riley asked but I kept running. I ran through the school, down the steps, and into the parking lot. I stopped when I got to my car. I opened the door and got in. Zane and Riley got in the back.

"Where's the hospital?' I asked as I pulled out of Degrassi.

Holly J's POV

Sav, Principal Simpson, and I walked out onto the stage. The Degrassi student body and staff was sitting and talking aimlessly. I saw Fiona sitting in the back row. In the corner of my eye, I saw Zane, Riley, and Anya get up and leave. Before I could wonder why, Simpson tapped the microphone and everyone turned their attention to the stage.

"Hello everyone. Sav, Holly J, and I have very important news. Before we go on, by a show of hand, how many of you know Drew Torres?" Almost every hand shot in the air. "But how many of you really know him? By a show of hand, how many of you knew that Drew had low self esteem?" No one raised their hands. "How many of you knew Drew had an eating disorder?" A few teachers and Jenna raised their hands. Everyone else sat in shock. "How many of you knew he cut himself?" No one raised their hands. "That's what I thought. Now I have a message to play you all. It's going to be intense and it's going to be a shock. If you don't think you can handle it, leave now." Mr. Simpson looked around the room. No one budged. I looked at Sav nervously. He returned my glance, looking just as worried. We hadn't heard the message yet.

Mr. Simpson walked over to the computer and hit play. A few seconds later the sound of Drew's voice eerily filled the auditorium.

"Hey Clare. It's Drew. I really needed someone to talk to. Everything is so messed up. Adam's mad at me, as you probably know. I didn't mean to make him mad. I really didn't. I was just being stupid. My mom is also mad at me. Not mad, but ashamed, like always. My teachers all think I'm hopeless." A few of the teachers looked down. "Nothing I do, school wise and other wise, is ever good enough. But, that's nothing new, right Clare? I've talked to you about all these things before. You always gave the best advice, but things are different this time. I just went to talk to Alli. Sav let me in and I went to her room." Sav put his head in his hands. "I walked in on her making out with Dave. Alli's been cheating on me, Clare." A few people turned to look at Dave, who looked very upset. "I don't blame her, though, I blame myself. I really tired to be a good boyfriend, but I failed. I drove her to cheat. She said I was worthless to her. She said that she could never love a guy like me. I realized no one could. That's why I'm going to end my life." A collective gasp echoed through the room. "Trust me, Clare. It'll make everyone's lives easier without me there to screw everything up. Clare, this isn't your fault, trust me. Thanks for putting up with me for so long and I hope you live your life to the fullest because it has value, Clare. Your life is the most valuable thing I know of. So, to wrap this up, can you please tell Adam that I love him more than anyone and that I will miss him so much. Tell him I'm sorry. Please tell K.C that he was the greatest best friend I could ask for and he is a great dad. Briana is lucky to have him. Finally, tell Alli that I really do love her. I love her more than words can describe. I know you're probably confused at why I still love her, but I do. Thanks for everything, Clare. You changed my life for the better. You're like the sister I never had. I love you." After the message, everyone sat motionlessly. Simpson picked up the microphone.

"This message was recorded at 5:57pm last night. At 6 o'clock Drew was hit by a car. He was rushed to the hospital where he went straight into emergency surgery. Just after 10:30, he got out. The doctor talked to his parents and his brother, Adam Torres. Drew had suffered a broken hip, leg, and shoulder, as well as a few broken ribs. The most serious damage, though, was to his head. He hit it very hard and there was a lot of damage. I'm very sorry to say, Drew is in a coma." The silence was finally broke. All around the room, students cried and talked animatedly. I saw Jenna take out her cell phone. I assumed she was calling K.C. I also saw Bianca. She sat in shock. On the left of the stage I saw Wesley, a normally quiet guy, screaming at Dave. Degrassi was in a panic.

Dave's POV

After Simpson's announcement, I wanted to disappear. Everyone now knew that I helped Alli cheat on Drew. Everyone was staring at me. They all probably hated me. I'd have to move schools, change my name. This was a disaster. I looked to my right and saw Wesley staring at me in shock. His shock soon turned to anger.

"Dave, look what you've done!" he yelled. I flinched. Wesley never yelled.

"I know Wes, I just-"

"I told you! I told you not to! I caught you two and you made me promise not to say anything! I feel so guilty because of you! How could you do this? Drew was always so nice to you! He was so happy with Alli! Why'd you have to ruin everything?" His face was red and a bunch of people were watching. By this time, the auditorium was full of chaos.

"Wes I'm so-"

"You're so selfish Dave! You wanted Alli and you didn't care who you hurt to get her! You could have killed Drew! Do you want to have to live with that for the rest of your life! Why are so selfish! Drew has a lot of crap in his life and Alli made it all better! He had an eating disorder and he cut himself! He hated himself! Then Alli came along and made it better until you two had to destroy him! I hate you, Dave! You ruined his life!" Wesley stalked off angrily and I stood there stunned. Wesley was my best friend. Now he hated me. Everyone hated me. I turned to leave the room and I saw a bunch of people glaring at me. I sighed and started to walk out. On my way, four girls came up to me and slapped me. I guess I deserved it. I walked into the hall and slumped down on the floor. A rush of emotions fled through me.

Jenna's POV

After Simpson's announcement, chaos broke out. People were in shock. I looked around. I noticed for the first time that all the people closest to Drew weren't here. They must be at the hospital. I took out my phone and called K.C. I had to tell him about all the chaos.


	29. Chapter 29

Clare's POV

Drew's hospital room was very plain. It had white walls, white sheets, white floor, and white chair. The only things not white were the stainless steel bed and the machines. At least he had a window.

Adam and I were with Drew while K.C and Eli ate breakfast. The doctor said Drew might be able to hear us so Adam's been prattling about nothing since we got in. He's been talking about sports mostly. More specifically how Drew's favorite teams are doing. He also talked about movies, video games, comics, even though Drew wasn't into the kind of stuff. Adam offered to leave so I could talk to him but I had nothing to say to Drew. I just kept hoping he'd wake up.

"Adam," I called quietly.

"Yeah Clare," he asked curiously.

"I'm scared." I whispered looking at the ground.

"So am I," he agreed soberly.

"What if he doesn't wake up?" I wasn't sure if Adam had heard me.

"He will Clare. He has to. He can't die, Clare. He needs to be alive. He needs to wake up and get help and then he can be the normal Drew. He needs to Clare." Adam rambled on while looking at Drew. It sounded like he was talking more to himself than to me.

"I just want him to be healthy and happy again," I said. It was the truest thing I'd said in a long time.

"Me too Clare."

I suddenly thought of Alli. She had no idea yet. I wanted to be the one to tell her. I think Adam would kill her if he saw her, and most other people would too. Alli is my best friend, or should I say was my best friend, and I think I should tell her. I was extremely mad and I would probably start screaming at her, but I, Saint Clare, was probably going to be the nicer to her than anyone else.

"Adam, I want to tell Alli," I said. Adam balled his hands into fists when I said her name but he nodded.

"Call her during her lunch," he suggested. I had a better idea.

"I'll have Eli drive me over to her school so I can tell her in person." Adam nodded and began to talk to Drew again.

"Wait, Adam." He looked at me again. "Drew used to cut himself," I blurted out. I couldn't help it. I needed to tell him, before it ate me alive.

"He what?" Adam asked. I couldn't tell what emotions he was feeling.

"He used to cut himself with a razor. I knew he did it once but then he told me he would stop. He made me promise not to tell anyone. I don't know if he's done it since I saw him. I already told your mom." I felt guilty for keeping a secret from Adam and for breaking a promise to Drew.

"Where?" he asked. I walked over to Drew and pulled up the hospital gown sleeve. I saw more cuts. My heart dropped.

"Right here."

Adam's POV

Finding out that Drew cut made me feel even worse. How could I have not noticed? I must be the worst brother in the history of the world. I excused myself from Clare as soon as I saw the cuts and ran into this bathroom. I looked in the mirror and broke down. How could I have not noticed?

Anya's POV

"I wonder what the assembly is going to be about," I said to Riley and Zane, my two best friends. I looked at them and they both shifted in their seats uncomfortable. We were sitting in the auditorium waiting for Holly J, Sav, and Principal Simpson to make an announcement.

"I have an idea," Riley said.

"What?" I asked hesitantly.

Ten minutes later, Riley and Zane were finished explaining. I was so shocked. I hadn't known much about Drew, but I felt so bad for him. To walk in on his girlfriend cheating on him must've been terrible. Also, to have all the problems he had. I know many people blame him for cheating on Alli, but from what Zane and Riley said, he learned from it and felt terrible about it. My heart ached to think that he had been so down he wanted to die. My eyes began to tear.

"Anya, are you alright?" Zane asked. Before I could answer Principal Simpson walked onto the stage. I couldn't listen to it again. I needed to get out of here. I grabbed Zane and Riley's hands and I ran out of the auditorium.

"Where are we going?" Riley asked but I kept running. I ran through the school, down the steps, and into the parking lot. I stopped when I got to my car. I opened the door and got in. Zane and Riley got in the back.

"Where's the hospital?' I asked as I pulled out of Degrassi.

Holly J's POV

Sav, Principal Simpson, and I walked out onto the stage. The Degrassi student body and staff was sitting and talking aimlessly. I saw Fiona sitting in the back row. In the corner of my eye, I saw Zane, Riley, and Anya get up and leave. Before I could wonder why, Simpson tapped the microphone and everyone turned their attention to the stage.

"Hello everyone. Sav, Holly J, and I have very important news. Before we go on, by a show of hand, how many of you know Drew Torres?" Almost every hand shot in the air. "But how many of you really know him? By a show of hand, how many of you knew that Drew had low self esteem?" No one raised their hands. "How many of you knew Drew had an eating disorder?" A few teachers and Jenna raised their hands. Everyone else sat in shock. "How many of you knew he cut himself?" No one raised their hands. "That's what I thought. Now I have a message to play you all. It's going to be intense and it's going to be a shock. If you don't think you can handle it, leave now." Mr. Simpson looked around the room. No one budged. I looked at Sav nervously. He returned my glance, looking just as worried. We hadn't heard the message yet.

Mr. Simpson walked over to the computer and hit play. A few seconds later the sound of Drew's voice eerily filled the auditorium.

"Hey Clare. It's Drew. I really needed someone to talk to. Everything is so messed up. Adam's mad at me, as you probably know. I didn't mean to make him mad. I really didn't. I was just being stupid. My mom is also mad at me. Not mad, but ashamed, like always. My teachers all think I'm hopeless." A few of the teachers looked down. "Nothing I do, school wise and other wise, is ever good enough. But, that's nothing new, right Clare? I've talked to you about all these things before. You always gave the best advice, but things are different this time. I just went to talk to Alli. Sav let me in and I went to her room." Sav put his head in his hands. "I walked in on her making out with Dave. Alli's been cheating on me, Clare." A few people turned to look at Dave, who looked very upset. "I don't blame her, though, I blame myself. I really tired to be a good boyfriend, but I failed. I drove her to cheat. She said I was worthless to her. She said that she could never love a guy like me. I realized no one could. That's why I'm going to end my life." A collective gasp echoed through the room. "Trust me, Clare. It'll make everyone's lives easier without me there to screw everything up. Clare, this isn't your fault, trust me. Thanks for putting up with me for so long and I hope you live your life to the fullest because it has value, Clare. Your life is the most valuable thing I know of. So, to wrap this up, can you please tell Adam that I love him more than anyone and that I will miss him so much. Tell him I'm sorry. Please tell K.C that he was the greatest best friend I could ask for and he is a great dad. Briana is lucky to have him. Finally, tell Alli that I really do love her. I love her more than words can describe. I know you're probably confused at why I still love her, but I do. Thanks for everything, Clare. You changed my life for the better. You're like the sister I never had. I love you." After the message, everyone sat motionlessly. Simpson picked up the microphone.

"This message was recorded at 5:57pm last night. At 6 o'clock Drew was hit by a car. He was rushed to the hospital where he went straight into emergency surgery. Just after 10:30, he got out. The doctor talked to his parents and his brother, Adam Torres. Drew had suffered a broken hip, leg, and shoulder, as well as a few broken ribs. The most serious damage, though, was to his head. He hit it very hard and there was a lot of damage. I'm very sorry to say, Drew is in a coma." The silence was finally broke. All around the room, students cried and talked animatedly. I saw Jenna take out her cell phone. I assumed she was calling K.C. I also saw Bianca. She sat in shock. On the left of the stage I saw Wesley, a normally quiet guy, screaming at Dave. Degrassi was in a panic.

Dave's POV

After Simpson's announcement, I wanted to disappear. Everyone now knew that I helped Alli cheat on Drew. Everyone was staring at me. They all probably hated me. I'd have to move schools, change my name. This was a disaster. I looked to my right and saw Wesley staring at me in shock. His shock soon turned to anger.

"Dave, look what you've done!" he yelled. I flinched. Wesley never yelled.

"I know Wes, I just-"

"I told you! I told you not to! I caught you two and you made me promise not to say anything! I feel so guilty because of you! How could you do this? Drew was always so nice to you! He was so happy with Alli! Why'd you have to ruin everything?" His face was red and a bunch of people were watching. By this time, the auditorium was full of chaos.

"Wes I'm so-"

"You're so selfish Dave! You wanted Alli and you didn't care who you hurt to get her! You could have killed Drew! Do you want to have to live with that for the rest of your life! Why are so selfish! Drew has a lot of crap in his life and Alli made it all better! He had an eating disorder and he cut himself! He hated himself! Then Alli came along and made it better until you two had to destroy him! I hate you, Dave! You ruined his life!" Wesley stalked off angrily and I stood there stunned. Wesley was my best friend. Now he hated me. Everyone hated me. I turned to leave the room and I saw a bunch of people glaring at me. I sighed and started to walk out. On my way, four girls came up to me and slapped me. I guess I deserved it. I walked into the hall and slumped down on the floor. A rush of emotions fled through me.

Jenna's POV

After Simpson's announcement, chaos broke out. People were in shock. I looked around. I noticed for the first time that all the people closest to Drew weren't here. They must be at the hospital. I took out my phone and called K.C. I had to tell him about all the chaos.


	30. Chapter 30

K.C's POV

I was sitting next to Drew's hospital bed. Everyone else was getting coffee but I had decided to stay and talk to Drew. Since he couldn't talk back, I rambled on about random subjects: Jenna, the baby, basketball, cars, etc. I was running out of ideas. I felt bad because I had hardly been able to talk to Drew on the day he got hit. I was so busy taking care of the baby. I wish I would've made more time to talk to him when I had the chance because I might never hear his voice again.

I had gotten a call from Jenna a few minutes ago. She said Simpson told everyone at Degrassi, and that the school broke out in chaos. She also told me that they played the message. Clare's phone was with Mrs. Torres so she must've given it to Simpson. I'm glad I wasn't at Degrassi today. I wouldn't have been able to take it.

"Room 416 is right here," I heard Riley call. His voice was coming from the hall. I thought Riley and Zane were supposed to be in school. Before I had any more time to wonder, Riley, Zane, and Anya came into the room.

"Anya?' I said. I was confused. Why was Anya here?

"Hey K.C," she said. I knew she was friendly but was she really friendly enough to skip school to visit someone she barely knew?

"What are you doing here?" I said trying not to sound mean. I was really curious.

"I wanted to see Drew," she replied taking a seat by his bed. She looked him over. I saw her eyes water. Drew looked pretty bad. He had a cast on his leg, hip, and his shoulder was bandaged. His head was cover in gauze.

"Alright. Why don't you talk to him?" I suggested. I bet if Drew really could hear, he'd be bored as hell. Anya took my suggestion and dove into a monologue.

Adam's POV 

I paid for my coffee and started to walk to the table Eli and Clare were at. We were at the coffee shop in the hospital. K.C was staying with Drew while we took a break. None of us have slept since Wednesday night. It was around 12 and we were about ready to crash. The only thing keeping us going was coffee. When I reached the table, they were discussing something quietly.

"Hey guys," I said tiredly. They looked at me cautiously. I sighed. "What?"

"I'm going to tell Alli," Clare said. I nodded, suppressing my anger. The truth was I was too tired to be angry.

"Fine as long as I don't have to see her," I said. Clare looked at the clock.

"We should go now," she suggested. Eli nodded.

"Be back in a bit," Eli said as they left. When they were gone, I slumped in my chair. I was so burnt out I was afraid I was going to collapse.

Clare's POV

I stepped out of Morty and took in the scene in front of me. I saw the rolling lawn of The Bishop Strachan School. Girls in grey skirts and maroon blazer milled around. I walked across the lawn until I came to the huge stone campus. The Bishop Strachan School was the all girl's school Alli attended. It was lunch time here so I knew it would be my only opportunity to talk to her. From what I've heard, Alli usually eats lunch in the small courtyard. The only problem was I had no idea where that was. I continued to walk until I found a blonde girl sitting under a tree. I made my way over to her and she looked up.

"Excuse me," I said semi-shyly. She looked up expectantly. "Do you know where the small courtyard is?" She nodded and gave me a small smile.

"I'll take you there," she said standing up. She seemed nice. We began walking down the pathway. "So, I'm guessing you're not a student here," she said nicely, eyeing my outfit. I was wearing purple velour sweats and a matching hoodie from Victoria Secret Pink. Eli brought me my sweats because my other clothes were stained with Drew's blood. This was my first time leaving the hospital since the accident and I felt under dressed.

"Yeah, I'm here to see a friend. It's urgent," I explained. I gave the girl a sheepish look. "I've been at the hospital since 6 last night so I'm a little unkempt." The girl gave me a concerned look.

"Who are you here to see?" she asked curiously. I thought for a minute before responding.

"Alli Bhandari."

"I know Alli. She's in my Algebra 2 class. Is everything okay?" She seemed genuinely concerned. Would I be able to trust her? She seemed honest enough.

"Her boyfriend, or ex boyfriend depending on how you look at it, is in the hospital." She looked horrified.

"Is he okay?" she said.

"No, it's serious," I told her soberly.

"Well, here we are," she said stopping. I looked around and saw we were in the courtyard.

"Oh. Thanks um…" I never caught her name.

"Mindy," she clarified.

"Thanks Mindy," I said.

"No problem. And good luck with everything," she called as she walked away. I waved. I saw Alli sitting at a table alone. She wasn't hard to spot. The courtyard was pretty empty and quite small. I took a deep breath and began to walk towards her.

Alli's POV

"Clare?" I wondered aloud as I saw my best friend walking towards me. I was spending my lunch in the small courtyard, like always. I was surprised Clare was here. She's never visited me in school before. Plus, Degrassi's lunch was from 12 to 12:50; lunch at my school starts at 1. Clare should be in class right now.

"Alli," Clare called as she came closer to me. I instinctively gave her a hug.

"What are you doing here?" I asked. "Why aren't you at Degrassi? Why aren't you in your uniform?" I shot questions at her quicker than she could answer them. Clare wasn't in her Degrassi uniform. That meant she probably didn't go to school today. But why?

"I needed to talk to you," she replied. She sounded weird.

"What's wrong?" I asked nervously.

"Let's sit," she suggested pointing at a nearby table. I was official terrified. I numbly took a seat and Clare followed suit.

"What's up?" I said trying to sound less nervous than I was. I was sure Clare could see through it, though.

"It's about Drew," she stated wearily. I understood now. Drew must have told her that I cheated on him. Clare was probably here to lecture me. A lecture was the last thing I wanted now. I rolled my eyes.

"Forget it, Clare. I don't want to hear it. It was my decision to cheat on him. I don't need a lecture." I sounded defensive. Well, I was. Clare shouldn't have the right to judge me based on my actions.

"I know Alli. I just want to know why," she asked desperately. "If you really liked Dave why didn't you just break up with Drew?"

"I didn't do it because I liked Dave," I cried in an exasperated tone. "I did it because I wanted to get revenge!" Clare looked appalled.

"You cheated on Drew to get revenge?" she yelled. Her eyes bugged out of her sockets. I nodded defiantly. "Alli, you could have killed him!"

"Don't be so dramatic Clare," I whined. "Drew will get over it eventually."

"No! Alli, you literally could have killed him!" Clare shrieked. I was confused.

"What are you talking about?" I cried.

"Drew tried to kill himself after he left your house. He jumped in front of a car." As soon as the words left Clare's mouth, I wanted to break down. I wanted this to be some twisted nightmare that I would wake up from any minutes. I wanted to believe Clare's words were false, just a way to make me feel guilty, but I couldn't. I saw the honesty in her eyes. Everything clicked. Clare wasn't in school because she was at the hospital. With my boyfriend, or rather ex-boyfriend. The one I drove to the edge. I wanted to cry.

"I need to see him," I stated finally. I needed to be there to see him. Clare could give me the rest of the details in the car. I just needed to be with him because despite all I put him through, I realized I really do love him.

Clare's POV

"Alright," I agreed unsurely. Alli wanted to see Drew. I could understand. If I found out that my recent ex was in the hospital because he attempted suicide, I'd want to be there to. I just wasn't sure how everyone would take it. Everyone hated Alli right now and after finding out the reasons behind her cheating, they would hate her even more.

Alli and I began to walk. She pulled me into the building and through multiple corridors. Alli's school was beautiful. The outside was all stone and they inside was just as sharp. It looked exactly like a prep school. I remembered my private school looked similar to this. It brought back a feeling of nostalgia. After a great deal of walking, we reached a kiosk. The lady there looked kind and friendly.

"Hi, Miss Emily. May I be dismissed early?" Alli asked not bothering to use her innocent voice. She looked overwhelmed. Miss Emily picked up on that.

"What's wrong, dear?" she questioned kindly.

"My boyfriend is in the hospital," she said with a heartbreaking expression.

"It's very serious," I piped. I wasn't exaggerating. Drew was in terrible shape.

"Go, just have an adult call me to verify," she said. Alli nodded and we rushed outside. We ran across the lawn to Eli's hearse. When we got there we pilled ourselves in.

"We're going to the hospital," I said. Eli raised his eyebrows but started the car anyway.

"I want to know everything," Alli said as soon as we started to drive. Eli and I shared a looked before I began.

"Drew jumped in front of a car. Eli and I were the ones who hit him," I looked down guilty. Eli and I still felt awful about that. "Drew broke his knee, shoulder, hip, a few ribs, and hit his head. He's in a coma now." Alli looked at me in disbelief.

"He's in a coma!" she shrieked. I nodded. "So I can't talk to him? I can't apologize?" she asked.

"You can. He might be able to hear you in a coma. But if you want to have a full fledges conversation, then no. It's not possible. If and when he wakes up, you can talk to him."

She looked very upset. The rest of the drive was silent.

Adam's POV

I was sitting in Drew's hospital room when I heard the door swing open. I turned and saw Clare, Eli, and Alli run in. Alli was here. My hands clenched into fists. How dare she show her face here! She was the cause of all this!

"Get out," I said flatly. I stood up from my seat. All three of them looked at me cautiously. "I said get out," I hissed menacingly.

"Adam, I-" Ali began. I wasn't having it. I didn't want to hear anything she had to say.

"Get the hell out!" I screamed. Everyone jumped at my sudden outburst. Clare looked defeated, like she knew I was going to react this way. Alli, on the other hand, looked shocked. How did she expect me to act? _Oh hello Alli. Take a seat. Thanks so much for almost killing my brother! _

"Adam, can we talk about this?" Clare asked diplomatically. Whose side was she one? Drew and I are her close friends. Why was she taking Alli's side?

"No, I want her to leave," I said finally. I wasn't going to budge. There was no way in hell I would let Alli visit Drew. She was the cause of this whole freaking mess!

Alli looked down sadly and walked out. Clare followed her. Eli gave me an apologetic look and followed Clare and Alli out the door. Thanks friends. Go comfort the enemy. The girl who caused my brother so much pain. She caused him to attempt to kill himself! Now he's in a coma and he might never wake up. Why should my friends be comforting her? She doesn't deserve it. Why wouldn't they stay with me? I'm their best friend. My older brother, who is also Clare's friend, is in a coma! But no, comfort _her_ instead. I hate Alli. She can go to hell.

Clare's POV

I knew Adam wouldn't take it well. It didn't surprise me. He hated Alli. He probably hated me for bringing her. I had to, though. She seemed so desperate. Alli, Eli, and I need to have a talk. If we understand Alli's point of view, we can convince Adam to let her see him. Alli looks dejected and Eli looks tense. I lead them both to a table in the cafeteria. We all take a seat. The silence is uncomfortable so I start to talk.

"That went well," I said. Eli chuckled and Alli glared.

"Why was he so mad?" she asked. Eli looked at her like she was insane.

"You're honestly asking that question?" Eli asked before I could stop him. "His brother just tried to kill himself because of you. Of course he's mad. He loves Drew and you cheated on him."

"Eli, let's hear Alli's side of the story first! Alli," I said turning to her. She shuffled uncomfortably before starting.

"I wanted to get back together with Drew so I could get him back for what he did to me. In the beginning, everything was great. Drew tried his hardest to make it up to me and I started to really like him again. He told me he loved me and I told him I felt the same way. I didn't love him yet. I liked him but I didn't love him. One day I saw Dave. He was perfect for the scheme. I was second guessing my decision to get even with Drew, but I asked Dave to hang out anyway. We kissed and for three weeks we hooked up behind Drew's back. In the back of my head, I knew I liked Drew and that I should stop but I didn't. Yesterday he walked in on us. I knew I no longer had a choice. I had hurt Drew. I could either beg for forgiveness, or get my revenge. I chose to get revenge. I said a lot of things I didn't mean. I knew he believed them. I'm so sorry. I would give anything to take it all back." She looked down guiltily. Eli and I exchanged a shocked look. Alli had been playing Drew the whole time.

"You cold, heartless, little bitch!" we heard someone yell. It was Adam's voice. We turned and saw Adam, Anya, Riley, Zane, and K.C standing there looking shocked. Adam looked pissed!

"Adam," Alli said. He shook his head vigorously.

"Get away. I don't want you anywhere near here again!" He yelled.

"Please don't," she pleaded but he stared at her coldly.

"Leave." Adam stormed away and the rest of them followed him. I assumed they were going to Drew's room. I looked at Alli and she had tears in her eyes.

"We'll bring you home," I said.

Alli's POV

After Eli and Clare drove me home, I went straight to my room and cried. I couldn't believe how everything happened. At first, my revenge plan seemed harmless. I was mad and I wanted Drew to feel the same way. After a while I started to realize that what looks easy on paper was harder in real life, as I started to fall for Drew again. Things started to get messy when I got involved with Dave, but I figured the whole thing would be over soon. On that fateful evening, everything came crashing down. My relationship with Drew will never be the same. I broke his heart worse than I'd ever intended. I broke his heart worse than I'd ever experienced. I caused him to give up on his life, because I had to take it too far and say a lot of stupid things I didn't mean. I was so mean to Drew! I was ashamed of myself. I wasn't surprised that Adam hated me with every particle of his being. I might have killed his older brother. Drew and Adam were closer than any pair of sibling's I'd ever met. They were best friends. They told each other everything. I might have taken Drew away from Adam forever.

I heard the front door open. My mom's high heels clacked on the wood floors. I sighed. I wanted to be alone. I shoved my face into a pillow and continued to cry. I cried until I put myself to sleep.

I woke up to a dark room. I looked at the clock. It was 6. I had no idea how long I'd slept for. I suddenly remembered Drew. Had it all been a sick dream? Was everything really okay? I opened my phone and saw a message from Clare.

Nothing's changed.

I sighed. It wasn't all a dream. It was reality.

"Dinner!" I heard my mother shout from downstairs. I got out of bed and looked in the mirror. My uniform was wrinkled and my hair was a mess, but I hardly cared. My makeup was smudged and smeared all over my face from crying. I grimaced and walked out of my room into the kitchen.

"Alliah, what's wrong?" my mother asked in concern. I just shook my head and sat down. I really didn't want to talk about it.

"Alliah, your mother asked you a question," my father said.

"I don't want to talk about it," I said quietly. I looked down and pushed my food around my plate.

"You're not going to tell them about Drew?" Sav asked venomously. I saw he was glaring at me. How did he know?

"How do you-?"

"Everyone at Degrassi knows," he hissed. My heart dropped. Everyone knew? That meant everyone hated me.

"Knows what?" my father asked. I stayed silent, but Sav glared at me.

"Alli cheated on Drew," he said accusingly. He didn't even hear my side yet! Both my parents looked shocked. They both knew about Drew. He had introduced himself to them in the beginning of our relationship. Well, the second one, after he cheated.

"Alliah, I thought we raised you to be honest and faithful," he replied in a very upset tone.

"It gets worse," Sav continued. I looked at him. He wouldn't. "After Drew caught Alli cheating on him, he jumped in front of a car. He tried to kill himself." My parents looked horrified. I was dead.

"Oh my," my mother said putting her hand over her mouth. "How do you know he was trying to kill himself?"

"He left a voicemail for Clare. Mr. Simpson played it at school today," Sav said. They played it for the whole school!

"Is he alright?" my dad asked. He really liked Drew, despite him being upset that I date.

"He's in a coma," Sav said solemnly. Did the entire world know every detail?

"Alliah, Savtaj, I would like you two to visit him in the hospital tomorrow," my father commanded. Sav nodded. I looked at him.

"I can't," I said. Everyone looked angrily at me.

"Why not?" Sav yelled. I flinched.

"Because I tried! Today, I left school early, with a note, to see him. When I got there, Adam demanded I leave. He wouldn't even talk to me. I walked into the room and he demanded I leave," I cried.

"Then Sav, your father, and I will go. We wouldn't want to disturb Drew's family by bringing you, but we would like to be respectful," my mother said with conviction. I was shocked. They were picking Drew over me! But what did I expect? I brought them all shame.

"Let's eat," my father said. I sat in silence and my family chattered.

After dinner, Sav and I were doing the dishes. I gawked at him but he didn't acknowledge me once. It was like I wasn't there. If only I had known that getting back at Drew would have so many awful consequences, I wouldn't have done it. Now my life was a living hell, but at least I was living a life.

"Sav, why are you so mad?" I asked, suddenly not being able to take the silence. He glared at me.

"Why do you think I'm mad?" he fired back. Touché.

"I'm sorry, okay? If I could take it back I would," I said.

"Yeah, that's sincere. You're so selfish Alli. Drew did a stupid thing, but he changed. He did everything he could to make it up to you. He was great to you. You still wouldn't let it go. You've never met a grudge you won't hold. You wanted revenge and you stopped at nothing to get it. Congratulations, you got your revenge. I hope it was worth it," he said walking out of the room.


	31. Chapter 31

Eli's POV

Clare, Adam, and I walked into school Monday morning. Even though we had walked into school together every day since we became friends, today felt different. Adam, Clare, and I talked and he wasn't mad at us. I hated helping Alli but Clare was her friend. I knew I would feel betrayed if my best friends helped the person I hated. I looked at Adam and he looked like a mess. He had hardly slept all weekend, choosing to stay at the hospital. Most of Drew's other friends had stayed in the hospital during the day, but went home at night, like Clare and I had.

During our walk down the hall, many people stopped Adam to ask about Drew. He gave the same tired response every time: nothing's changed. Having someone in a coma is awful, I soon realized. There's nothing you can do. Nothing ever changes. You can't even communicate with the person. You visit every day but it doesn't help. You're not visiting them, you're visiting a body. It drains every drop of energy you have.

"Adam, can I talk to you?" Simpson said as he approached us. Adam nodded and walked off with him. Clare and I looked at each other. We had both been walking on eggshells around Adam. If we were sad, it made him sadder. If we were happy, it made him annoyed. We both just kept quiet around him.

"We should go to class," Clare sighed. I nodded and we began to walk.

Riley's POV

I walked into economics and took a seat. I looked next to me. Drew's seat was vacant. Everyone knew why he wasn't here, but no one said anything. It was the elephant in the room. The bell rang and our teacher walked in. He started to do attendance. He called out names in alphabetical order, but skipped Drew.

People could pretend everything was okay, because for most people it probably was, but for everyone who was close to Drew, this day was going to be hell. The next few days, weeks, months, however long Drew was in a coma, would be hell. I tried to keep my mind on school, but I couldn't. I kept thinking about Drew. I was trying to see if I saw any signs that he would try to kill himself. I couldn't pick out any. He seemed so happy with Alli. There was always a gleam in his eyes. They were never dull, or dead. He smiled and laughed. He was so full of life! How could one girl make him want to throw it all away? Granted, he walked in on his girlfriend cheating on him, but his life was worth much more than Alli. That bitch.

The bell rang and I looked down at my notebook. The page was empty. Great, I was probably going to fail the next quiz. Too bad I don't care. All I care about right now is Drew waking up.

Adam's POV

I walked down the hall like a zombie. People would stop me periodically and ask about Drew. I had nothing new to tell them. Nothing had changed. I was just waiting for this day to end. My parents said the first day back would be the hardest but I was skeptical it would get better. As long as Drew was in a coma, life was going to suck. Simpson said I could go home whenever I wanted, but it wouldn't help. Either worry at home, or worry here.

"Adam," I heard a voice called. I turned around and saw Bianca. She had called me Adam. Not freak, not tranny, and not Gracie. Adam. Weird…

"Yeah?" I asked not even attempting to mask my confusion.

"I'm so sorry for you and your family. I'm praying that Drew wakes up soon. I can't believe everything. Drew seemed so happy and full of life the last time I saw him. I can't believe he's in a coma. Please let me know if anything changes," she said sincerely. I was shocked. I had never heard Bianca be so nice.

"Thanks Bianca. It means a lot to me." I said. I was about to leave when she stopped me.

"And Adam, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for being so terrible to you. I'm also sorry for messing up Drew's relationship with Alli on Vegas Night. It was wrong of me." She looked guilty.

"I forgive you," I said. I couldn't believe she was actually apologizing for all the mean things she'd done.

Bianca smiled once before walking down the hall. I stayed there in shock. Maybe people really could change.

Clare's POV

It was my first day back at school since the accident. Everyone at school knew I was the person Drew left the voicemail for. It's rough. People have come up to me and asked me what happened, or stuff like that. I just couldn't take it. Everywhere I turned, I was reminded of Drew. In homeroom, his empty seat mocked me. In the halls, I seemed to pass his locker between every class. I never really noticed Drew's presence in my life until it was gone.

I walked into lunch and sat down. Eli and Adam were already there, chatting quietly. Fiona came walking about the same time that I did. We both took a seat opposite Adam and Eli. We were sitting at our normal table. Even though Drew only sat with us sometimes, his absence was evident. We all stayed sort of quiet. Adam and Eli talked about comics and Fiona and I half heartedly discussed fashion. We both hated the Degrassi uniforms.

"So what are you all doing after school?" Fiona asked finally, trying to distract everyone. The tension at the table was obvious.

"Going to the hospital," we all said in sync. Fiona looked down and pushed her lunch around her tray. I knew she was trying, but the reality was that this couldn't be avoided. It wasn't going to go away. We all needed to deal with it, by visiting him, or praying, or however we decided to deal. We can't just walk around pretending everything was okay.

"So Bianca talked to me," Adam said randomly.

"What did she do?" Fiona asked coldly. She was afraid Bianca said something mean to him, we all were. If Drew were here, he would've tensed at that statement. His brotherly instincts would've kicked in. He would be ready to comfort Adam and ready to defend him. After all, Bianca was the one who ousted Adam at the beginning of this year.

"She apologized… for everything," he said unsurely, surprising us all.

"Really?" Eli asked.

"Yeah. She was really nice," he said.

"That's great," I smiled. This showed that people really could change.

"She mentioned Drew," he said slowly. It was the first time any of us had spoken his name today. The sobriety of it was almost too much to handle.

"I'm sorry," Eli said.

"It's fine. People have been saying it all day. I need to get used to it," Adam explained.

"May you should go home?" Fiona suggested.

"And be reminded of him everywhere I look? No thanks." After that we let the conversation drop. Until Drew wakes up, life is going to be hell.


	32. Chapter 32

K.C's POV

After school at the hospital, the usual people were crammed into the small hospital room. It was Riley, Zane, Anya, Clare, Eli, Adam and I. We all sat, talking to Drew, talking to each other, or doing homework. Adam and Eli were discussing a new comic book. They didn't seem into it, but I figured Eli was trying to get his friends mind off Drew. Clare and I sat together doing homework. We were in the same math class and biology class. On the other side of the room, Riley and Zane were in an intense conversation while Anya sat by Drew's side. Since the first day she came, Anya's come to talk to Drew every day. Anya had a huge heart, everyone knew, but I had a lot of respect for her now. She was such a sweet person.

Anya wasn't the only one to talk to Drew, though. I talked to him. I missed being able to talk to him in school. Not having my best friend there was unbearable. Everyone else had their best friends to help them get through this. Adam, Eli, and Clare were best friends and Riley, Zane, and Anya were best friends. I was the only one who was pretty much alone. Don't get me wrong, all of us were getting close given all the time we spent together, but I didn't have my best friend. I didn't have the one person who knew me better than anyone else to help me through this. I didn't have Drew. My best friend tried to kill himself. And that was killing me.

Adam's POV

I sat at home for dinner for the first time in days. Today was my first day back at school since Drew slipped into a coma. It was awful. After school, I spent 3 hours at the hospital. I didn't want to leave but my mom wanted us to have a normal family dinner. Who was my mom kidding? A normal family dinner while Drew was in a coma? Impossible.

As I pushed my food around, Mom stared at me. We were all silent, not having anything to say. For so many years Drew was the glue of this family. He was the one who talked about sports with dad. The one who would make Mom's blood boil, but also make her laugh like no one else. He was the one who made our house lively. He would jab at me and I would insult him back. We would fight over the remote control or over the last soda, but we were always best friends. Drew and I told each other everything. Drew was a huge part of this family.

But that was before Alli. Before she broke his heart. Since the Vegas Night Dance, our family has been drifting. I never noticed it until now. Our family fell apart. Our glue, Drew, stopped doing his job. When Drew started keeping to himself, everyone else just ignored it. I would eat at Fiona's or at the Dot. Drew probably didn't eat at all. I knew hardly anything about Drew's life. I hadn't noticed how broken our family was becoming. It took a tragedy to show me that.

"Grams is coming tomorrow," Mom said suddenly. I totally forgot! Grams was supposed to come to visit on Friday. With everything happening with Drew, I had totally forgotten.

"Does she know?" I asked dumbly. Of course she knew. If she didn't she would have come on Friday like she planned.

"Well," my Mom faltered. I looked at her with my eyebrows raised.

"I told her Drew was in an accident, but I didn't tell her what happened. She only knows he is in the hospital."

"You didn't tell her he's in a coma? Or that he tried to-"

"No Adam!" Mom sighed. "I'll tell her when she comes tomorrow."

"Can't wait," I said sarcastically. It was going to be Grams' first time meeting Adam and she was going to be told her grandson was in a coma. Fun visit.

Fiona's POV

My cell phone rang and I smiled widely. Adam was calling. I haven't talked to that lovely boyfriend of mine since lunch. I wasn't angry though. He had a lot on his mind. I felt horrible about his brother, Drew. I can't imagine how I'd feel if something happened to Declan. I would die.

"Hello?" I asked finally picking up the phone.

"Hey Princess," Adam greeted tiredly. I frowned. He seemed unhappy.

"What's wrong, my Prince?" I asked worriedly.

"Grams is coming tomorrow," he explained.

"Don't worry, Adam. Everything will be fine," I assured.

"My mom didn't tell her about Drew, except for the fact that he's in the hospital."

"Wow. When is she going to tell her?" I asked.

"Tomorrow. She'll be meeting her transgender grandson and be finding out that the other one is in a coma. That totally won't overwhelm her," he complained. I saw his point. That was too much for one person to handle.

"I see your point. Maybe it'd be best if I stayed away for a few days," I said reluctantly. As much as I wanted to meet Adam's family, I knew this visit was definitely not the time.

"I was thinking that same thing," Adam said sheepishly. "Thanks for understanding."

"No problem, Adam. Call me when you can."

"I promise, Princess. I love you."

"I love you, too," I said hanging up. I sighed and called Holly J. Maybe she could stay over for a few days.

Dave's POV

Life was seriously sucking. Everyone in school hated me, and showed that hate every single day. I got glares, snide comments, and outright insults. I deserved them all. I was one of the reasons Drew was in a coma. The other two reason being Alli and a car. Alright, I admit, that was a bit dramatic. Drew had a multitude of reasons, but people decided to only acknowledge one: me.

I tried to get Wesley to talk to me again, but he wouldn't budge. He even got Connor to ignore me too. Couldn't my friends see that everyone in school hated me? Did they have to also? I was such a loser. I ate lunch in the library, I sat alone in every class, and I even did homework during my spare! I was the epitome of the word pariah. I think my teachers even disliked me. I've never felt so alone. Even Alli was ignoring my calls. I had called her multiple times since I found out about Drew. Every single one went to voice mail.

Not only did the general population hate me; Adam and all of Drew's friends had a legitimate reason to want me dead. Every time I saw one of them, I was ignored, snubbed, or yelled at. The day that Adam came back to school, I tried to talk to him, but he just told me to stay away. Next I tried K.C. He had the same reaction, only scarier. He spoke to me with so much venom, I was terrified. I avoided him at all costs. I also tried Fiona, Riley, and Zane. They weren't as bad, but they ignored me. It was like I wasn't even there. Lastly, I tried Clare. Even Saint Clare hated me. She was slightly cold, but also a little understanding. She told me to give everyone some space. Seeing me reminded them of Alli, which was a sore subject. Before Clare and I were done talking, that Eli guy came and yelled at me. I guess I'm just going to have to get used to being the pariah of Degrassi.

Alli's POV

I was lying on my bed crying. I've been doing a lot of crying lately. I felt so guilty for what I did to Drew. The last conversation I had with him was burned into my memory. _Because, you're worthless to me Drew. You never meant a single thing to me. Do you really think any girl could love a guy like you?_ How could I be so cruel? If I ever had someone say that to me, I would be devastated. No one wants to be called worthless. Especially not someone with self-esteem issues. My timing couldn't have been worse as well. Drew was feeling down that night, like everyone wanted him gone, and I'd told him he meant nothing to me. I was a monster.

My cell phone rang and I quickly picked it up, hoping it would be news about Drew.

"Hello?"

"Hey Alli," I blanched. "It's Dave." Dave. I didn't want to talk to him or see him. He was my living reminder of the horrible things I'd done, not only to Drew, but to him. I couldn't face him. I couldn't face anyone again. I was about to hang up, when I heard Dave. "Please talk to me," he begged. My heart ached and I decided I needed to be honest with him.

"Hi," I said timidly.

"Why have you been ignoring me?" he asked.

"I couldn't face you," I replied honestly.

"Because of Drew?" he asked. I bit back tears.

"I haven't been honest with you," I confessed.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"I never had feelings for you, Dave. I'm so sorry." I quavered while spoke.

"I don't understand. Why would you cheat on Drew with someone you didn't like?" He sounded genuinely confused.

"Because I wanted to get him back. I wanted to get even," I said shamefully.

"So you played us both?" he asked, his voice getting angry.

"I'm so sorry, Dave," I cried sincerely.

"All of Degrassi hates me because of you! Forget it, Alli. You're the same heartless, snob you were in grade 9." With that he hung up. I started sobbing. Everyone officially hated me. The entire Degrassi student body, my brother, my best friend, Drew's family, and now Dave. My life was completely over.


	33. Chapter 33

Adam's POV

"Adam!" Grams called as she got out of her car. I was standing in the doorway watching her. I had just gotten home about an hour ago. The day was almost worse than yesterday. Grams made her way over to me and I met her halfway. She pulled me into an embrace. Her hug was very comforting. I let me know that she was okay with me the way I was. My heart soared. "You look so strong, Adam. Do you mind helping me carry my luggage in?" This was a job she usually asked Drew to do. She was showing me she thought of me as a grandson. I was so happy.

"Sure, Grams," I replied enthusiastically. I walked over to the trunk and started to grab her luggage.

"How is your brother doing?" she asked. I stiffened. Drew. Just when I was starting to forget, Grams had to bring him up.

"Um… my mom wants to talk in the kitchen, so let's go," I said dodging the subject. We walked into the house. I dropped Grams' bags in the living room and we walked into the kitchen where my mom and dad were sitting. They both looked like they hadn't slept in days. That was probably true. I heard them talking every night. My mom wept about how they were terrible parents since they didn't notice Drew was having a hard time. She couldn't understand what had happened to her once happy, carefree son. Neither could I.

"Hello Audra," Grams said giving her daughter a hug. "How are you, Omar?" she asked turning to give him a kiss on the cheek. "Is everything alright?" Grams asked, picking up on the tension.

"Mom, there is something I need to tell you about Drew. Let's all take a seat," my mom began. I tried to back out of the room unnoticed, but my mom pulled out a chair. "Come on, Adam." I sighed and took a seat. Grams waited patiently.

"Audra didn't tell you everything when you two spoke on the phone," my dad explained.

"You said Drew got into a minor car accident," Grams said innocently.

"Mom, Drew jumped in front of a car," my mom confessed. Her eyes watered. Grams looked upset.

"Why would he do such a thing?"

"He was trying to kill himself," my mom continued, tears following steadily now.

"Oh my," Grams murmured as tears welled in her eyes. Even my dad and I had glassy eyes.

"Can I visit him?" Grams asked through her tears. I took the liberty of answering.

"Yes, but he's in a coma." Grams looked at me with her tear streaked face and pulled me in for a hug.

"We told Grams," I said into the phone. I was talking to Eli. Grams and my parents were at the hospital. I couldn't go. I needed to get some homework done, but I was going to be there with Clare later today.

"Did you send her into cardiac arrest?" Eli asked. I rolled my eyes.

"No, Eli. We didn't kill her."

"Well, good. So what are you doing later?"

"I'm heading to the hospital with Clare. Wanna join us?" I asked.

"No thanks. I think I'll sit this one out. Hospitals are kind of depressing," he explained. I understood. Eli didn't really know Drew that well.

"Alright. Talk to you later, man," I said hanging up. I went back to my homework unenthusiastically.

Fiona's POV

"It'd be nice for him to call," I complained mildly to Holly J. She agreed to stay at my condo for a few days to keep me company.

"I bet Adam's just busy. Do you know if he's heading over to the hospital tonight?" she asked. I sighed. Holly J was right. Adam had a lot on his mind.

"I think so. He's there every day, so it'd make sense for him to be there today."

"I know it's hard, Fi. But he's going through a hard time. Imagine if something happened to Declan." She said biting her lip. It was obvious Holly J was still in love with Declan. I wish those two would just get together already!

"I know. I'd be more of a mess than Adam is, but Drew's condition isn't changing. He's not doing much good going there every day." I know I sounded spoiled but I knew Holly J wouldn't judge me.

"At least Drew's alive. He might not always be. Adam probably doesn't want to miss anything if Drew… you know." I saw Holly J's point. I was being selfish. I just wished I could have my boyfriend back.

"He's been spacey and off in school. He doesn't want to hang out. He doesn't even act like a boyfriend," I continued to rant. I needed to get these things off my chest.

"Just be patient, Fi. He'll come around," she promised. I nodded, hoping she was right.

Clare's POV

I got back from the hospital, exhausted. It was draining being in hospitals. Even though you're not doing much, the emotional stress wears you out. I checked the clock and saw it was 10:30. I groaned and got into the shower. I was going to be exhausted tomorrow, but I couldn't complain. Based on how Adam looked tonight, I'd bet he hasn't had a good night's sleep since the day before the accident.

After my shower, I got into my pajamas and climbed into bed. Whenever I closed my eyes, I saw Drew's bloody body in the street. I tried to shake the thoughts out of my head but I couldn't. I started to cry silently, warm tears rolling down my face and onto my pillow. I missed Drew. Not knowing if he was going to live or not was killing me. Even though we only became friends a few months ago, we've gotten pretty close. Close enough to the point that I was the last person he wanted to talk to before jumping in front of Morty. Too bad I didn't pick up. If I did, Drew would be okay. He'd be in his house with Adam. Probably with a broken heart over Alli, but it'd be better than having him in the hospital.

I couldn't imagine how tough this was for Adam. Drew and Adam were as close as siblings could get. Not having Drew was torturous for Adam. Also, the last time the two talked, Adam was yelling at Drew. Things must be worse for Adam than he's letting on.

Giving up the idea of sleep, I got out of bed and walked over to my phone. I plugged in a familiar number.

"Hi Darcy."


	34. Chapter 34

Clare's POV

After talking to Darcy last night, I felt a million times better. My older sister always knew what to say. She knew what it felt like to be Drew, since she tried to kill herself once. She could explain things to me that no one else could. She could answer all my questions. Darcy reassured me that it wasn't my fault that I didn't answer the phone. It was a bad twist of fate. I needed to stop with all the "what ifs" because it wasn't doing any good. It wasn't helping Drew, it was only making me feel awful. She also told me to call her whenever I needed to talk.

Thanks to Darcy, I walked into Degrassi this morning more chipper than usual. I even rode my bike, something I haven't done in a long time. I walked through the halls with a spring in my step and a slight smile on my face. Until I saw Adam. As soon as I saw him, my mood dropped. He looked more exhausted than yesterday. He has dark circles under his eyes and he could barely stand. My heart ached as I realized that Adam couldn't turn to his older sibling to make him feel better, like I did. Adam didn't have his older sibling right now.

Alli's POV

I was walking down the aisle of the grocery store trying to fly under the radar. Today is the first day I left the house other than to go to school. I didn't want anyone seeing me. They all hate me. Who wouldn't? I did something terrible to Drew. I was a monster and everyone knew it.

I was so wrapped up in my thoughts that I ran into someone. I fell to the ground on my butt. I quickly looked up and saw Fitz, the guy who pulled a knife on Eli at Vegas night. He extended his hand for me to take.

"I don't need help," I snapped as I got up on my own. I knew it was mean, but I wasn't in a good mood.

"You're Alli Bhandari right? I heard about-" I cut him off.

"Yeah. Everyone in the freaking universe heard. Back off, loser. You have no right to judge me," I sneered. "You were the one who brought a knife to school." Was it too much to ask that I leave the house and NOT find someone who knows about Drew?

"I was going to say I'm sorry that people are being mean to you. I wasn't going to judge you, but don't you dare judge me." Fitz sounded nicer than I thought he would.

"Why not? You almost stabbed Eli."

"I was never going to. But how is what I did any worse than what you did? I didn't put anyone in the hospital," he said matter-of-factly. I was burning red. How dare he? "Anyway, I thought if anyone would understand what it's like to have everyone hate you, it would be you. Whatever." He turned to walk away.

"Wait! I get it. We're both in the same boat. I'm sorry for judging you," I said, realizing Fitz was probably the only person at Degrassi that didn't hate me.

"It's okay," he said sheepishly.

"I could really use a friend," I said honestly. Fitz smiled a genuine smile.

"Me, too," he replied. I smiled back at him. Maybe things were looking up for me.

Dave's POV

I sat on the bench inside the memorial garden and picked at my lunch. The garden was empty, luckily. I've been eating lunch in here for a while now. I couldn't face the cafeteria. Sitting alone while everyone glares isn't the way I want to spend lunch period. I sighed and took a bite of my sandwich. Just as I did, the door opened and a tall brunette walked in.

"Can I sit here?" she asked.

"You want to sit near me?" I asked dumbfounded. I thought everyone at Degrassi hated me.

"What's so wrong with that? I'm Sadie, by the way," she said with a smile and an extended hand. I smiled back.

"I'm Dave. It's just that everyone in Degrassi hates me," I confessed. She looked at me.

"I don't hate people that I don't know," she said honestly.

"Do you know what I did?" I asked.

"I heard you helped Drew Torres' girlfriend cheat on him," she answered. She didn't sound disgusted. "Is it true?" I nodded. Sadie didn't leave.

"You aren't going to leave?" I asked curiously.

"No," she replied, shocking me. "I don't care about what you did. It's none of my business. Why should I hate you?" She finally took a seat next to me.

"That's really good to hear," I confessed. Sadie gave me a heart melting smile. For the first time I felt like maybe this will all blow over.


	35. Chapter 35

Adam's POV

It's been a few weeks since Grams left. Time seems to pass in random increments. Slow drags and disorienting rushes. My life is the same dull tired routine everyday: School, hospital, school, hospital. Tick tock, tick tock. I don't know how much longer I can take this. I feel numb. I feel hopeless. Most days I stumble around school dead tired. My friends are worried. They're afraid that I'm going to go off the deep end just like Drew. I would never do that, though. I need to be strong for Drew.

Part of me can't do this anymore. Any of this. I just want Drew back at home, alive. I wish more than anything that I can go back in time and stop this because it truly is hell. It sucks beyond belief. My family is crumbling before me and I can't save it. I wish the doctors knew something! This hopeless waiting is slowly killing me. It's draining every ounce of strength my family has. Drew was our rock and now that he's gone, so are we.

Alli's POV

It's been weeks since Fitz and I first met. We were fast friends. No one else could understand exactly how I felt quite like him. We had so much in common. Not things like family or music, but with our minds. They work the same way. Fitz can tell exactly what I'm feeling before I ever have time to let the emotion cross my face. It was refreshing. Fitz doesn't judge. He didn't look down upon me like Clare sometimes did. I didn't need to be sure I was making good decisions for Clare. I could be me, the person I truly am.

I didn't have to lie with Fitz either. I could open my whole heart and be honest. It was weird. With Drew, I always had to be the sassy, cute, smart girl he thought I was. I never showed him any emotions. It wasn't love. Maybe he loved me, but how could we have loved each other if I was so guarded and insincere. Maybe it was the closest to love Drew has ever been.

Drew. Why must my mind bring him up? It's not fair. This endless waiting is killing me. I need Drew to wake up before I drown myself in guilt. It was all my fault and I couldn't handle it. Fitz was there for me a lot of the time. He said not to feel so guilty. If I don't forgive myself no one else will. Sometimes I snap at him, but I can't help it. No matter what anyone else has been through, they have probably never been in my shoes. They probably have never been in a situation like this.

Still, even with the guilt looming over my head, Fitz has taught me to be myself and to have fun. I've never met anyone in my life that looked to me with no expectations and said "Be yourself". I was in need of an angel and Fitz was the one sent.

Fiona's POV

As much as I hate to say it, Adam is not my boyfriend. I mean, technically, he is. But he isn't there emotionally. I feel like since Drew, Adam has been drained of all emotions. He is a robot. He goes to school, goes to the hospital, and then goes to sleep. We never hang out anymore. I try so hard to be understanding, but what Adam and I have is no longer love. It's a crutch.

"Holly J," I ask timidly. She mumbles something that sounds like a yes. "I'm thinking of breaking up with Adam," I confessed. Holly J sent me a shocked look.

"Really? I thought you liked him a lot," she mused.

"I do, but our relationship is dead. Ever since Drew…" I trailed off.

"I get it, Fi, but do you really think now is the best time?" she asked kindly. My temper flared.

"This relationship is a crutch. It's there in theory, but in reality, there's nothing between us. I need to end it." My fists were clenched.

"It seems like you've made your decision. Looks like now you have to talk to Adam," she said. I grimaced. "Come on, Fi."

"Fine," I replied walking over to the front door. I grabbed my keys. "I'll be back."

Once I got to Adam's house, I knocked on the door, half expecting no one to be home. Unfortunately, I was wrong.

"Hello," said a tired voice opening the door. It was Adam. He looked like the living dead.

"Hey," I replied. "Can we talk?" He nodded carefully and ushered me in. This boy in no way resembles my loving, happy boyfriend. This boy is a shell.

"What's up? He asks once we were seated on the couch.

"We need to talk," I said cringing at the cliché break up line. Adam blanched slightly. "I'm so sorry, Adam, but I can't do this anymore."

"What do you mean?" he asked softly.

"We need to break up. This isn't a relationship anymore, Adam, and I'm not willing to drag it along. It will be best for both of us to end this now," I explained.

"Why Fiona? I love you," he pleaded. I shook my head.

"I love you, too. But you have things to deal with right now. Things that don't concern me. When everything is… sorted out, we can try again, but right now you aren't emotionally ready to be in this relationship." Adam's heart break turned to fury as hot tears welled up in his eyes.

"Sorted out," he scoffed. "You mean, when Drew is dead." Hate burned in Adam's eyes. I was taken aback.

"No, I didn't mean that at all, Adam," I assured. "I just meant for us to wait until things are more set in stone, whatever that may be."

"Just leave Fiona. You don't understand. No one does. Only Clare!" Tears were pouring down Adam's face. I got up sadly and walked to the front door. With one last look, I walked out the front door. I might as well have walked right out of Adam's life.

Adam's POV

When Fiona left, I felt something I haven't felt in a while. Since Drew, all I have felt is dull sadness. Now, I felt a wild, angry, heartbreak that threatened to rip my heart to pieces. How could she do this to me? Leave me now when I was so broken. I don't understand why she would just get up and leave. If she loved me, she would have stayed. She wouldn't have left. The hot tears fell down my face almost violently. I couldn't stay alone like this, in my misery. I needed someone to lean on. I picked up the phone and called Eli.

"Hello," he answered.

"Hey Eli," I choked. "Can you bring me to the hospital?"

"Is everything okay with Drew?" he asked immediately.

"Yes, I just want to see him."

"Alright," Eli agreed. "I'll be right over."

Half an hour later I was the only person in Drew's room, other than Drew of course. I was sitting in the chair next to his head pouring my broken heart out. Drew was always my confidante. I told him everything. I knew if he could hear me, he would be just as understanding and helpful as he always was when I needed advice. I just wished that I could hear him. I miss him so much.


	36. Chapter 36

Eli's POV

"Ahhhhhhhhh!" I screamed into my empty car! I can't take this anymore! I'm losing my best friend and my girlfriend! I keep trying to grip them both tighter so I won't lose them. Adam is becoming distant with everyone. Drew's condition is wearing him down to nothing. I try to get his mind off it, but Clare always snaps at me. Clare.

Clare is slipping from my fingers. All she ever talks about anymore is Drew. Drew this, Drew that. I'm her freaking boyfriend! Don't I matter? Why aren't I enough? I realize that she's upset over him. In the beginning, I was understanding of what she was going through, but now it's almost too much. He's been gone for weeks! She needs to move on with her life. Drew will get better when he gets better. Her obsessing over it won't make him any better.

I noticed my hands in a vice grip around my steering wheel. I took a few calming breaths and my hands started to loosen. _That's good Eli. Stop being so goddamn dramatic_. I needed to walk back into school and go to class. After that, I could talk to Clare and make everything okay. I took a deep breath and started walking back to Degrassi. Everything was going to be fine.

K.C's POV

I was sitting in my history class when I got a text. Jenna. I opened the text when Mr. Perino turned his back. The text read:

The baby is sick. I'm home taking care of her, but I have a test

in Perino's class next. If I skip, he'll fail me.

I quickly texted a reply.

I'll be home in a few minutes. I can skip my last class.

I watched Mr. Perino as I waited for a reply.

Thank you, babe!(: You're the best! 3

I smiled at my phone.

No prob Jen. :)

I put my phone away and looked at the clock. 15 more minutes of this class. That gave me enough time to get home and for Jenna to get here. I quickly thought up an excuse.

"Can I go to the nurse?" I asked Mr. Perino. He glared at me for disrupting the lesson, but he nodded begrudgingly. I grabbed my things and quickly ran out the door, not wanting him to change his mind. I ran down the hall to my locker. I grabbed my books and went to the nurse.

I told her the truth about Briana and she gave me a pass to leave. I thanked her and ran out of Degrassi. I began to walk home. The distance was short. As I neared my house, I remembered to text Clare.

Hey Clare. The baby's sick so I won't be in math. Meet u the hospital

Clare's POV

As I walked from Chemistry to Algebra 2, I checked my phone. I got a text from K.C. He said that he will meet me at the hospital, but he won't be in math. I grimaced. I couldn't imagine how hard everything was for him. Even though he hurt me, we've been reconciling since freshman year. I consider K.C a friend now and I feel bad for him and Jenna. Even though it really was their own fault…

When I got into math, I took my usual seat. Mr. Armstrong began to teach, but I zoned out. My mind went to Drew. Adam is getting worse and everyone is starting to lose hope. It's been weeks and still nothing has changed. The doctors fear Drew will have permanent damage to his body if he stays in a coma any longer. Things seem hopeless.

Things with Eli were also weighing heavily on my mind. He seemed weird lately. He gets annoyed if Adam or I bring up Drew. I think it's childish. He's being completely rude. I know Eli isn't friends with Drew, but he could show a little empathy towards Adam and I. We missed Drew and Eli was treating that like it's a crime.

My mind swirled, filled with a million different things. I sighed and tried to focus on the equations Mr. Armstrong was writing on the board.

Eli's POV

"Hot date tonight?" I asked Clare seductively. She was at her locker putting her books into her bag.

"I'd love to, but I can't," she said closing her locker. We began to walk in step.

"Why not?" I asked.

"I'm going to see Drew. Maybe after," she replied. I was a little annoyed.

"Can't you visit him tomorrow? It's not like he's going anywhere," I argued. Clare turned to look at me in disbelief.

"I'm visiting him today. Just deal with it," Clare said harshly. I realized that I said something wrong.

"I'm sorry, Clare. I didn't mean it like that. I just feel like you're always visiting Drew. You never have time for me anymore."

"Eli, of course I'm visiting Drew as much as I can. He's in the hospital. What kind of friend would I be if I didn't? And I have plenty of time for you," she said smiling at the last part. I shook my head.

"But he's been in the hospital for weeks and nothing's changed. Can't you visit him like once a week?"

"You're being so insensitive," she accused. "Drew can die, Eli," she whispered. "I want to spend time with him while I can."

"I know," I said gently. "I'm sorry." She nodded. "Can I give you a ride home?" I asked as we walked towards the front doors.

"No thanks. My mom is bringing me to the hospital." She swiftly kissed my cheek and walked away.

She was mad. Definitely mad. But why? I had the right to be annoyed. She was always visiting Drew. Drew was in a coma! Why did she need to visit him every day? I sighed angrily and texted Adam. Maybe he would want to hang out.


	37. Chapter 37

**Author's Note: As promised, here is chapter 37! :) I think you will all really enjoy it! Just read on and see! I'm so happy to finally be able to put up this chapter! :) Let me know what you think! **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi.**

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Clare's POV

I was sitting next to Drew's hospital bed holding his hand. K.C was sitting in the other chair studying. He and I come here every day after school from 3 to 4. Other people came at different times. We were all used to the schedule now. Visiting Drew became such a habitually, normal thing in my life. It's been 6 weeks since the accident. Random students stop by from time to time, but as the weeks dragged on the visits dwindled until they almost stopped completely. Only Drew's closest friends and family continue to visit. People are giving up hope.

"Eli and I had a fight," I said aloud. K.C looked up from his math homework.

"About what?" he asked.

"Drew. He doesn't understand why I visit him so much. I think he's jealous, which is completely ridiculous." K.C nodded.

"I think he's jealous, too. It's been six weeks and you're still coming to see Drew. It shows Eli that Drew means a lot to you," K.C explained.

"Of course Drew means a lot to me. We're friends," I said defensively.

"Then Eli should have no reason to worry." K.C smiled at me and I smiled back.

"So how's the baby? I asked. It was a little weird that my ex-boyfriend was a father, but I was coming to terms with that fact.

"Good, but hard. Jenna's getting a little annoyed that I leave her with Brianna when I visit Drew, but she understands how much I miss him."

"I miss him, too." Just as I said that, I felt my hand being squeezed. I looked down at Drew's hand.

"K.C," I said, my voice getting higher. It felt another squeeze. "Drew just squeezed my hand!"

"Are you serious?" he said in disbelief. I nodded vigorously. "I'll get a nurse."

K.C ran to get a nurse while I stayed watching Drew in disbelief. He stirred slightly. Suddenly, he slowly began to open his eyes. He blinked up at me and I looked at him in disbelief. He tried to move but I gently put a hand on him.

"Hi," he whispered in a hoarse voice. I started to tear in joy.

"Drew!" I said caressing his hand. Just then K.C burst through the door with a nurse.

"Drew!" K.C yelled excitedly as he ran over to us. He stood next to the bed excitedly. The nurse chuckled and walked over to Drew. She checked the machines and turned to Drew.

"Drew, I'm the nurse. How do you feel?" she asked slowly.

"Sore," he replied clearing his throat. "And weird."

"You've been in a coma for about 6 weeks," she explained. Drew looked shocked. "Now, I have a few questions," the nurse said. Drew nodded. "What's your full name?"

"Andrew Torres."

"How old are you and what grade are you in?"

"I'm 16 and I'm in grade 11."

"What school do you go to?"

"Degrassi Community School."

"Can you name your immediate family members?"

"Omar, Audra, and Adam Torres."

"You seem to have your memory," the nurse said. K.C and I shared a look of relief. "Can you tell me the last thing you remember?" As soon as the nurse said that, Drew's face darkened.

"I got hit by a car. That's the last thing I remember," he said slowly.

"Drew, you tried to kill yourself, correct?" Drew's features were still dark and emotionless.

"Yes," he whispered. K.C and I looked at each other sadly.

"That's all for now. I'll be back in a little while," she said. She smiled at us all and walked out of the room.

"Was it really six weeks?" Drew whispered.

"Yeah. It was a really long time," K.C said. Drew looked sad.

"K.C, call everyone and tell them about Drew," I suggested. He nodded and took out his phone. He stepped into the hall. I sat next to Drew with happy tears in my eyes.

K.C's POV

I hung up the phone after I finally called everyone I needed to call. Adam and Eli were on their way. Adam said he'd call his parents and Fiona. Then I called Jenna. Everyone was really happy. The waiting and hoping was finally over!

I really need to talk to Drew. I walked into the room and saw him and Clare casually chatting. I smiled. Drew and Clare had such good chemistry. I could already see why Eli was feeling threatened. Clare and Drew had a connection, or whatever.

"Hey man," I said as I approached them. He smiled weakly when he saw me. He looked so fragile.

"Hey," he replied.

"I missed you so much," I confessed, not caring how much I sounded like a girl. Clare got up and let me sit next to Drew. Drew smiled. "But listen, I need to tell you something. I knew about Alli and Dave. I found out in gym on the day you got hit. I tried so hard to tell you. I tried to tell you in gym but Jenna stopped me. Then I tried to text you but Mr. Perino took my phone. I ran to your house, but you weren't home. Then I called you from your house phone but you didn't pick up. I'm so sorry, Drew. I really tried." I took a big breath. Drew's face darkened when I mentioned Alli but it softened as I talked.

"Thanks man. You tried everything you could. I'm lucky to have a best friend like you," he said earnestly. I broke out into a huge smile and gave him the best hug I could, considering he was laying down and covered in wires.

"I'm so glad to have my best friend back," I said. He smiled.

"Thanks for all the sports updates," he said wryly. I laughed. Every day while Drew was in a coma I came and read sports stats to him.

"You could hear," I said happily. He nodded. Just then Adam and Eli came running into the room. They all looked at Drew, different emotions on their faces. Adam looked thankful, overwhelmed, and in disbelief. Eli looked genuinely happy and relieved, despite his jealousy towards Drew.

"Andrew," Adam called running to the side of the bed. I got up to sit by the window sill. Adam sat as close to him as possible and started to cry with his head in his hands. Drew's hand weakly comforted his brother.

"Hi," he said weakly. Adam cried harder. Eventually, he spoke.

"Andrew, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean any of the things I said. I love you more than anyone else in the world. You're the best big brother anyone could ask for. You don't understand how sorry I am. I never should've said those stupid things. It's my fault you jumped in front of Morty. Please forgive me, Drew. And promise me you'll never do that again, I can't lose you again." Adam choked out. He was still crying. Drew looked at him with a soft expression. I had no idea what was running through his head.

"It's alright Adam. I forgive you. It's nice to know you didn't mean those things. You know how much I love you. "Adam, don't blame yourself. It wasn't your fault." He sounded a little sad.

"Promise me you won't do anything like that again!" Adam insisted. Drew looked away uncomfortably.

"Adam, now really isn't the time," he said still averting his gaze. Adam looked troubled but nodded. He didn't want to cause drama. Drew didn't need it, plus he didn't look like he could handle it right now. He still looked very weak.

"Uh Drew," Clare said shakily stepping forward. Drew looked up at her. "I'm so sorry, Drew. Every day I wished I'd answered the phone so you would never have jumped in front of Morty. I could've talked you out of it. I felt terrible knowing I could've done something but I didn't. I never would have forgiven myself if I'd lost you. Please forgive me. I was such a terrible friend." Clare quavered slightly, a few tears rolling down her cheek. It seemed like everyone had something to apologize for.

"Clare, it's not your fault. You probably couldn't have talked me out of it anyway," he reassured. I wasn't so sure. Clare could be very reasonable and persuasive. I think she could've talked him out of it, if she had the chance. "You're a great friend. Don't doubt that." They smiled at each other for a minute. Clare gave Drew a long hug before walking back to Adam and a jealous Eli. Eli took a step towards Drew.

"Drew," Eli said awkwardly. "I'm sorry for hitting you with Morty." Drew smiled slightly.

"No need to apologize. It was my fault. I hit you. I'm sorry if Morty got damaged because of me. That wasn't really my intention," Drew said. Eli smirked and clapped him on the shoulder, the good one.

"Morty's alright," he replied.

"Glad to hear that," Drew said. We stood around in silence until we heard someone burst through the door. It was Mr. and Mrs. Torres.

"Andrew!" Mrs. Torres yelled. She ran over to Drew and started to cry. Drew looked confused and shocked. "I'm so sorry," she wailed. Everyone had a reason to apologize, apparently. "I never should have said what I said during our fight. I love you, Drew, exactly the way you are. You're the perfect son. Don't you ever forget it! I love you so much. Please don't ever do that again. Your dad and I wouldn't know what to do if we lost you for good." Mrs. Torres was still crying as she gave Drew a hug. I could see Drew's eyes were shiny.

"I love you, too," he murmured. "It's okay," he comforted.

"Don't comfort me, Drew. You're the one everyone needs to be comforting. How are you?" She asked with concern.

"I feel kind of relieved to be alive," he said. Everyone visibly relaxed. "A lot of the reasons why I, you know, aren't there anymore. I felt like everyone wanted me out of their lives and killing myself was the only option. Now I know I have people that care about me." He still sounded a bit unsure, but I was glad he was feeling that way.

"That's really good Andrew," Mrs. Torres said. We all nodded.

"Can I take a nap?" Drew asked tiredly. We all laughed.

"What? Six weeks wasn't enough for you?" I joked. Drew laughed. I was so glad to have him back.

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**DREW! :) He's finally back! Yay! :) Let me know what you think of this chapter. It was such a good chapter to write, even though I wrote it months ago. Leave a review :) **

**The next chapter will be up monday or tuesday. it's already written :) **


	38. Chapter 38

**Author's Note: I'm SO sorry this is a week late! I had the chapter but then it got deleted so I needed to rewrite it (after a million hours of complaining) and then when I was done, I found the original and I needed to pick which version I liked better. I'm so sorry. On the bright side, last week was my last week of school and I did a lot of writing for later chapters in this story ;) So enjoy the very late, but hopefully pretty good Chapter 38!**

**SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT! I made a tumblr for this story. That way you can contact me I can let you guys know when chapters will be posted. Also, I have pictures of outfits and places up for you to see. I also might post discarded chapters and alternate versions of different chapters if you guys would like. The link is on my profile so check it out please! :) **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi.**

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Alli's POV

Fitz and I were sitting on my couch. Fitz had the TV turned on to something random while I sat and read a book. Fitz and I started getting closer and closer. I wasn't sure how to define our relationship at the moment. It was more than just friendship, but it wasn't quite romantic. I was lost in thought when a shrill ringing interrupted me. I sighed and picked up my cell phone.

"Hello?" I asked impatiently.

"Hi Alli," Clare's soft voice greeted through the phone. "Am I interrupting?" she asked.

"No," I said with s sigh. "I was just annoyed. So what's up?" I set my book down on the couch.

"Drew's awake," Clare said. I was shocked. I wasn't expecting that. I was too shocked to feel any other emotions. "You should talk to him, Alli." Dread ran through me. I didn't want to see Drew. I didn't want to have to come clean and reveal everything. I couldn't.

"I don't know, Clare," I said honestly.

"Just think about it," she said.

"Fine, I have to go," I said. I just wanted this call to end.

"Alright bye," Clare said, hanging up. I put the phone down with a huff and pulled a pillow over my face.

"Who was that?" Fitz asked. I removed the pillow and looked at him. He looked worried.

"Clare. Drew woke up," I explained. Fitz didn't say anything for a second.

"Are you going to see him?" he finally asked.

"I don't know," I whined. "I don't want to have to face him. I was kind of hoping I wouldn't have to." I stopped, rethinking what I'd just said. I just said I wanted Drew dead. I wanted to throw up. Cheating on him and leading him to suicide was one thing, but wishing him dead. I wouldn't be a more horrible person. I was hoping to just run away from my problems no matter what the consequence. Even if it was Drew's life.

"Alli, it won't be that bad," Fitz said gently, probably sensing my self disgust.

"It will. He'll hate me even more than he already does. I don't want him to hate me," I rambled.

"Do you still have feelings for him?" he asked. I was stumped. I had no idea what I felt.

"I have no idea. I think so," I said. I was really upset. Why was this so difficult? Why did I have to create this huge mess?

"Then you should talk to him. You owe it to him. Plus, you might not get another chance," Fitz said. He was right. I did owe it to Drew to tell him the truth. If I was ever going to move on with my life, I needed to do something with Drew. Ever since I met him, my life has been crazy. I needed to either end things with him or fix them.

"I know, but I don't think I can. Drew will hate me. I'm an awful person Fitz. What kind of person does the things I do?" I said, tears welling up in my eyes. "Drew could've died," I cried. "Because of me. I didn't even notice what a hard time he was having. Then I had to go and make it worse. I never thought I'd hurt him that much. I never dreamed of what he would do. Why am I so selfish? I thought my selfishness would stop after Drew was in a coma, but I was wrong. Not 5 minutes ago I wished him dead. I'm a monster Fitz. Why are even here with me?" By this time I was sobbing. I couldn't help it. Hot, angry tears poured down my face. I chocked on the sobs ripping from my chest.

Fitz pulled me into a hug, a real, genuine, heartfelt hug. It was the first hug like that I've gotten in a long time. I felt kindness and caring for the first time in a long time. I felt something I've never felt before. I felt true, honest, genuine love. I knew what I needed to do.

Drew's POV

I sat in my hospital bed groggily. It was pretty early in the morning. I had just woken up. The nurses were in and out all night to make sure I didn't slip back into a coma. It was annoying to be woken up so many times. I was exhausted. Just when I was about to go back to sleep, I heard my door opened. I heard the click clack of heels and it felt nostalgic. I turned to see the mystery person. When they finally came into view, I was stunned. It was Alli.

"Hi," she said quietly. She looked awful. Her eyes were red from crying and her hair was thrown up into a messy bun.

"Hi," I said. She came over to me slowly. She sat down cautiously next to my bed. I sat up. I had no idea what to think. A bunch of different emotions ran through my head. I was happy she was here, but I was mad that I was happy. I was also angry and sad about what happened between us the last time I saw her. My heart still felt broken, maybe beyond repair. Being in a comma didn't help the healing process at all. I felt like the thing with Alli happened yesterday.

"Drew, I'm so sorry," she began. I nodded. "I know I owe you more than that, but I thought it was a good way to start." She took a deep breath. "Drew, I never meant the things I said to you on that night. I'm not just saying that. There was a reason I was so cruel. Not a good one, but… It was all an act. I didn't mean a word of it. You meant a lot to me, Drew. You still do."

"Then why were you cheating on me with Dave?" I asked.

"I wanted to get back at you," she whispered. I sat blank faced.

"What?" I said not understanding.

"I wanted to make you feel the way I did when you cheated on me, but I took it too far," she explained.

"So you played me the whole time?" I said. My emotions mixed between anger and heartbreak.

"Only at first. As time went on, I developed real feelings for you. I started to really like you."

"But you still cheated," I said, pointing out the obvious.

"I know and I'm sorry," she pleaded. I needed a moment to think. "I feel something for you Drew. I don't know if I'm ready to let us go yet."

"What are you saying?" I asked. I wasn't sure what she meant.

"Do you think we could try again? I know I hurt you, Drew, but maybe third time is the charm." Alli was killing me. Part of me still wanted and needed her, but the other part knew I needed to be away from her to ever get better. This was the hardest decision of my life.

"I can't Alli," I said in a pained voice. I gave her a look of agony. "You're not good for me. I need to be away from you." It took every ounce of strength I had.

"So your mind is made up?" she asked. I hesitated but nodded. This is what I needed. "I'm so sorry, Drew," she murmured taking my hand. A throat cleared and we both turned to see who it was. It was Adam. "I should go," Alli said, squeezing my hand before releasing it.

"Bye Alli," I said with a small smile.

"Bye Drew." Alli walked out of the room. I heard her retreating footsteps as she walked down the hall. As Alli was leaving, Adam walked in and took a seat next to me. I sighed and looked at him.

"You did the right thing, Drew," he said sincerely

"I need her to be out of my life," I said. "She's not good for me."

"You deserve better, Drew. You're amazing. You need to date someone who can see that." Adam smiled at me. I smiled back. "I really missed you bro," he said sincerely. I pulled him into a hug.

Later that day I was still sitting in my hospital bed eating Jell-O. It was the good kind at least. The green kind. I heard footsteps coming towards my room. It was probably a nurse or a friend. When the door opened, I saw Dave Turner walk in. My jaw dropped.

Dave's POV

I walked into the hospital wearily. I heard that Drew was awake and I needed to talk to him. My conscious was basically dragging me through the hospital. I went to the desk and asked for his room number. After an agonizingly slow walk, I was in front of Drew's door. I walked in.

When Drew saw me, his jaw almost dropped, as did mine. I hadn't seen Drew since he was leaving Alli's house. He looked so much different. He was skinnier. His skin looked paper thin, like it could tear at any moment. He generally looked weak, especially attached to all those machines. I gulped.

"Um, Hi Dave," Drew greeted me unsurely. I walked over to his bed.

"Can I take a seat?" I asked awkwardly. He nodded.

"Have you spoken to Alli?" I blurted out. I wanted to kick myself. I couldn't have asked anything more stupid.

"Yeah, she came to see me earlier," he replied emotionlessly. I swallowed hard.

"I just wanted to say I'm really sorry, man. I know that helping someone cheat is always wrong, but she had really convinced me that she had feelings for me. I should never have let it happen, but I was being selfish. I saw what I wanted and went after it at any cost. I didn't realize what was actually at stake," I said looking down at my shoes. Drew was silent. I looked up, trying to read his face. I saw compassion.

"Alli played us both, Dave. I can't exactly blame you…" he trailed off. I looked at him, waiting for him to elaborate. "We're cool, man." I was shocked. What?

"Seriously?" I asked in disbelief

"You're a pretty cool guy, Dave. No reason for this to cause a problem," he said offhandedly. I was really shocked.

"Thanks man," I replied happily. "I guess I'll see you later," I said getting up.

"Yeah, bye," Drew said as I left. Walking down the corridors of the hospital, I felt so much better.

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**Bad? Good? Eh? Worth the wait? Let me know what you think by leaving a review! :) They mean a lot. Also, check out the blog. **


	39. Chapter 39

**Author's Note: I don't have much to say... Um... Enjoy the chapter :) I hope you all like it. The story will get more interesting soon, I promise. Sorry if this seems like a filler. Also, do you think the blog is a good idea? (PLEASE LET ME KNOW) Because if you do, I have some deleted chapters I could put up, if you guys would like to read them. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi.**

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Adam's POV

I walked down the halls of Degrassi in the best mood I've been in since Drew's accident. Tons of people stopped me as I walked to ask about Drew. Most of the student body knew the news. I just couldn't believe everything. After all this time, Drew was finally awake and he was okay! When I think about it, so much has changed since Drew slipped into a coma. Now everything seemed to go right back. Drew couldn't see, but he was so important to the balance of so many people's lives. He was worth so much more than he could see.

Eli's POV

"Clare, can we talk?" I begged. She was quickly walking down the empty hall on her way to lunch.

"We are talking," she said curtly.

"I'm sorry, okay?" I said exasperatedly.

"If only that actually meant something," she said, stopping and turning to me.

"Why are you being so difficult?" I asked. "Why can't you just forgive me and we can head to the Dot for lunch?"

"I'm not being difficult, Eli."

"Then let's go to the Dot. Just you and me," I said putting my arm around her.

"Fine," Clare said stiffly. I took her hand and we walked out to the hearse.

Adam's POV

"When can I go back to Degrassi?" Drew asked. My mom and dad looked at each other. I was sitting in the chair next to Drew's hospital bed. It was about 4 in the afternoon.

"We'd like you go to take a little time off first," my mom explained. Drew looked confused. "You're on suicide watch, Drew. We think it's best for you to take care of your… issues before going back to Degrassi."

"What issues?" Drew asked a little indignantly.

"We know about your cutting," she confessed. Drew looked a little upset.

"Don't get mad at Clare," I warned. Drew sighed.

"I don't anymore," he muttered. The room was silent for a minute. "What else?' he asked.

"Well, you also had a problem with starvation. Drew, we just want you to get better. You were at your worst right before you tried to kill you yourself. We're determined not to ever let it get that bad again." My mom actually had a point.

"Alright so what am I going to do when I'm not in school?" he asked.

"We want you talking to a therapist everyday and we're all going to be around to make sure you don't do anything harmful," my mom explained.

"Great," Drew grumbled.

Clare's POV

I was doing my math homework on my kitchen table when my cell phone rang. I picked it up instantly.

"Hello?" I asked.

"Hey Clare." It was Adam.

"What's up?" I asked. What I meant was, how is Drew?

"Not much. Just got back from the hospital. Drew's annoyed. My mom told him she wants him to stay out of school for a little bit longer. She wants him to solve all his problems. We told him we know about the cutting." I grimaced. I hope Drew doesn't hate me.

"Does Drew hate me?" I asked. If he did, it would be awful. I felt guilty for breaking my promise to him, but he'd tried to commit suicide. His family was asking for answers and I had them. I couldn't keep his secret any longer.

"No, I think he understands." I sighed with relief.

"Good. Was he feeling okay? I'm thinking of running over there now." I could probably ask my mom to take me.

"Yeah, he seems a lot better. Stronger, you know," Adam said happily. I could tell the immense difference in Adam since Drew woke up. Adam was happy and full of life again, despite his recent break up.

"Alright. Any other news?" I asked.

"Oh yeah. I almost forgot. Drew's getting released tomorrow at like 12," Adam said. I smiled. Drew was finally going home.

"That's awesome!" I exclaimed into the phone.

"Yeah, well I'll talk to you later Clare."

"Okay. See you tomorrow," I said before hanging up. I grabbed a jacket and went to find my mom.

Drew's POV

I was in my hospital bed thinking about everything. I was in a weird mental state. I felt appreciated and needed, but my insecurities loomed over me. I knew my mom was right. I needed therapy. I needed to get my life back in order before I went back to school. I just didn't want to face everything. It was easier to hide my problems, but I understood first hand that hiding them let to awful things. I needed to deal with them now.

I was unsure how I felt about Clare telling my parents. I wasn't mad at her. I knew she must've had good reasoning. It was the right thing to do. Anyway, If I had died, they would have a right to know. On the flip, if I survived, like I did, they'd have to know the extent of my problems anyway. I guess she saved me from an awkward conversation.

Even though I had a lot to deal with, I missed being normal. Back before all this drama, I was normal, or at least as normal as I ever was. It sucks to be the way I am now. Everyone treats you differently. They walk on eggshells because they don't want me to go off the deep end again. I just wanted to be treated normally. They only people who've been doing that so far are Adam, Clare, and K.C. I was thankful my real friends still saw me the same way.

Clare's POV

I walked into Drew hospital room for the last time ever. It felt weird. This room has been such a part of my life for the last six weeks. I wasn't complaining, though. Drew was being released today. I was extremely happy to have Drew back. It's too bad he can't go back to school right away. Adam and Drew both told me about Mrs. Torres's idea. I thought I was a good one. We all just really want Drew to get better.

"Hey," Drew said grabbing my attention.

"Hey Drew," I said smiling back at him. "Are you excited to be leaving?"

"Yes, very! I can't wait to be normal again." I rolled my eyes.

"You are normal, Drew," I corrected.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," he joked.

"Sorry about telling your parents about the cutting," I said with a slight grimace.

"It's fine," Drew said waving it off. "You kind of did me a favor actually." I was about to respond, but my phone vibrated in my hand. I picked it up and saw it was a text from Eli asking where I was. I frowned and ignored it.

"What's wrong?" Drew asked, concern evident in his eyes.

"Eli and I have been fighting," I confessed. "He's very… possessive." Drew frowned. "Don't worry about it. We'll get over it." Drew still looked worried. "So did you catch the hockey game last night?" I asked, diverting his attention. Drew smiled widely.

"Obviously," he replied as we began a long discussion about the Oilers and the Flames.

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**Was it horrible? Okay? Just average? Let me know :) **


	40. Chapter 40

**Author's Note: I feel really confident about this chapter. I loved so much to write it. It made me feel so good. I actually love it. I can say that I'm back! Ready to give you readers my all. I'm going tpo update the next chapter tonight or tomorrow. Anyway, please, please enjoy! **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi.**

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Drew's POV

I walked into my therapist's office slowly. The room was light blue with dark brown leather furniture. Therapy was new to me but it was going to become a regular thing. I was required to go every day until Kara decided I didn't need it as much and could come once a week. Kara is my therapist. I've only been seeing her for a few days now but she's actually really nice. I like her a lot.

"Hi Drew. Nice to see you again," she said pleasantly. I smiled.

"Hi," I said taking a seat. Kara took out my file and sat it on my desk.

"What do you want to talk about today?" she asked kindly. For the first few days, I'd been reserved, but I was ready to open up now.

"I'm ready to talk about everything," I said slowly. Kara looked pleased.

"That's good Drew. Really good." She smiled and patted my hand gently. "So tell me, when did you start feeling worthless?" I took a deep breath.

"I've always sort of felt that way, since I was 11 or 12. I wasn't good at school and I was always getting in trouble with my mom. I started to feel important when girls began showing interest in me. I figured that I must be pretty valuable if all those girls liked me. I got to high school and it got better. I started on the senior team as a grade 10 and I became popular. I felt on top of the world. Who cared if my grades were bad? Everyone loved me. When I came to Degrassi, I felt the same way. I didn't want to be tied down to just one girl. Then I met Alli. I didn't want to be exclusive with her because I wanted all the attention from other girls. It made me feel important. That's why I cheated on her with Bianca. Bianca made me feel like a rock star. I realized after Alli found out that all I wanted was her, no one else. I spent all break thinking and I wanted her back. When she denied me, I started to stop eating. Not only had I lost Alli, I lost the interest of all the other girls. I felt like I had no value. When Alli took me back, I figured I'd get better. She quickly ended things again and I knew that was it. She was leaving. I started to not eat because I was upset, but then I realized I didn't deserve to eat. All the thoughts I had as a kid came back, but worse. I felt utterly worthless. Then Alli called me one day and we got back together." I felt relived to say the things I was always too scared to say. I'd never told this to anyone. I felt good to finally be able to.

"When you were dating Alli, how did you feel?" she asked after she finished scribbling what I had said down on a piece of paper.

"I felt good. Like I was worth something again. Like, if Alli thought I was worth it, then I really was. I was happy."

"Did you feel genuinely happy? Or do you think you were relying on Alli? You did say that you needed girls' attention to feel important."

"I needed Alli to make me happy," I answered. She looked at me for a moment.

"Is that healthy?" she asked.

"No," I allowed. I realized that my relationship with Alli was unhealthy. All my relationships have been unhealthy.

"We can work on that over time Drew. We can make that one of our goals. We need to help build up your self-esteem so that you can have a healthy relationship." I nodded and smiled a little.

"I really want that."

"So, what happened on the night of the incident? Did you and Alli break up?" she inquired. I looked at my hands. "It's okay, Drew. We did a lot today. We can talk more when you're ready." She looked at me with a reassuring smile.

"No, I'm ready now," I said after a beat of silence. I took a deep breath. "It all started earlier in the week. My teachers were telling me I was failing. I tried so hard in school, but never did well, like I said before. I felt stupid. Especially when one of my teachers called me hopeless. I felt like I should just give up. Then on Thursday, I got into a fight with my brother. I didn't mean to make him mad. I'd never seen him so angry. He said a lot of things. He said I was stupid and his life would be better off without a brother like me. Adam and I are so close; It killed me to hear him say that. Then when he left, my mom and I got into a fight. She said she wanted to have a perfect family, but I messed everything up. I left home and headed for my girlfriend Alli's house. I walked in on her making out with another guy. She was being cruel to me. She said a girl could never love a guy like me and that I never meant a single thing to her, and I never would. I was just fed up. Everyone in my life was telling me that I was worthless and that their lives would be better without me. I had no one else to turn to but Clare. I needed Clare to save me. I called her and she didn't pick up. The pain was too much. I knew I had no one else. I thought if I was gone, everything would be better. Everyone would be better off without me. When I heard a car speeding around the corner, I jumped. It was the quickest way out. Eli's car was the last thing I saw. Then I was in a coma." Kara looked at me sadly. She rubbed my shoulder.

"That's terrible, Drew. It seems like a lot of bad things just hit you at once. You didn't plan on killing yourself, did you?"

"No," I said honestly. "After all that bad stuff was dumped on me, I realized I just wasn't strong enough to handle it."

"You are strong, Drew. We're going to overcome this. Both of us, together. We're going to work on it. You'll be in a healthy state of mind," she promised. I smiled slightly. "How did you feel waking up from the coma, knowing your attempt failed?"

"I don't know."

"Were you upset? Relieved? Happy?" she asked.

"At first I was upset. I was upset because I thought that everything would be the same as that night. When everyone came and apologized, I felt a little bit better. Like maybe I could get through this. I don't really know how I feel though. I just want to feel normal."

"You will, Drew. I promise you."

Adam's POV

"How was therapy?" I asked, walking into Drew's room and sitting next to him.

"It was good. I'm feeling a lot better," he replied.

"That's great," I said with genuine smile.

"So what's up, little bro? I feel like we haven't had a chance to talk in a really long time."

"Yeah, we haven't. Well, Fiona and I broke up," I said. Drew gave me a sympathetic look.

"What happened?" he asked.

"She said that our relationship wasn't what it used to be since your accident. She felt like I wasn't emotionally into the relationship because I was so preoccupied with you." Drew groaned.

"I feel really bad now. I ruined things with you and Fiona." I gave him a stern look.

"It wasn't your fault, Drew. It was hers. She shouldn't have left me when I needed her. I understand how she feels but I didn't leave her when she was drinking. I stuck by her." I ramble on in self pity. I was angry with Fiona. She just seemed so selfish. She hasn't even called me since Drew woke up.

"That sucks, Adam. You'll find someone better," he encouraged.

"I still want her, Andrew," I muttered.

"Then if it's meant to be, you guys will patch things up," he said with a smile.

"Thanks, bro." Drew's phone went off. He pulled it out of his pocket and checked the screen.

"I've got to take this," he said motioning to his phone. I nodded and walked back to my room. When I got there, I flopped back on my bed thinking about Fiona.

Drew's POV

I sat in my normal chair across from Kara. I'd been seeing her for a few weeks and I was starting to get better. I never thought it would happen, but it was. I knew my recovery wouldn't be overnight, but I could see progress. I've told Kara things I haven't told anyone else, except Clare. Clare calls me a lot after therapy to talk. It feels good talking to her. She understands me.

"Anything else you want to talk about today?" Kara asked, pulling my thoughts away from Clare.

"Did you know I used to cut?" I asked. Kara nodded slowly.

"It's in your file. I was just waiting for you to bring it up," she replied. I nodded.

"Well, I don't anymore." Kara was silent for a moment.

"Why did you do it?" she asked. "Why cut yourself? What were you achieving?"

"I cut because it helped me let out the anger."

"Anger at whom?" she pressed.

"At myself," I said simply.

"Why were you angry at yourself?"

"I hated myself. Sometimes I still do." That was one of the truest things I've said.

"Why?" she asked.

"Because I mess everything up. I self destruct every relationship I'm in. Every time something starts going right, I mess it up. I'm not the kind of person that can have a good life. I won't let myself." Every word I spoke lifted pounds off my shoulders. I felt like I could breathe for the first time.

"Is there something that made you that way?" she asked. She was trying to see things in my point of view.

"I don't know. That's just the way I am." I gave Kara a hard stare.

"But that doesn't have to be the way you are, Drew. You are the type of person who can have a good life. You will in time."

"I'm beyond help!" I snapped. I felt myself breaking and I couldn't understand why. "I can't be fixed!"

"Drew," Kara said softly.

"No!" I yelled. I took a steadying breath. "I'm sorry. I can't do this right now." I closed my eyes quickly before walking out of the room. I walked past my mom in the waiting room. She chased after me, but I still didn't stop.

"Drew!" she called. I stopped abruptly. "What happened?" I saw concern in her eyes.

"It's just intense," I replied tightly.

"It'll get better," she said. I almost snapped at her, but my anger quickly dissolved. I was so emotionally drained. I had no energy to fight her. She pulled me in for a hug and I didn't resist.


	41. Chapter 41

**Author's Note: Sorry this is late. I had another chapter ready but I decided to go in another direction. Here it is :) Enjoy. **

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Drew's POV

I sat on my bed talking to Clare. I was frustrated. We've been talking for an hour trying to figure out my "underlying problems". I have no freaking clue what Kara or Clare is trying to get at. I'm screwed up. They should accept it. I've come to. I don't understand how to solve my problems if I don't know what they are.

"Maybe you're afraid of commitment," Clare suggested. I was lying on my bed talking on the phone with Clare.

"Can we not talk about this?" I asked distractedly. I was toying with a football.

"Okay what else is a possible answer? Maybe something happened in your childhood…" I sighed. I told Clare I didn't want to talk about it.

"I don't know," I answer. I wanted to forget about it.

"Come on Drew. You must know." I was getting frustrated, but I didn't want to snap at Clare.

"I don't know, Clare," I groaned.

"Fine," she said. "I won't push you anyone. I just want to say one more thing. Okay?" I thought for a moment before answering.

"Alright. What?"

"I know you don't think so right now, but if you'll work through this. If you need to talk, just call me." As soon as the words left Clare's mouth my anger dissolved. I smiled a genuine smile.

"Thanks Clare," I said sincerely.

"Oh shoot," she said. "Eli's calling. Talk to you tomorrow?" she asked.

"Yeah. Bye." I hung up the phone and let my mind wander.

Clare's POV

I hung up with Drew and quickly dialed another number. I lied. Eli hadn't been calling, I just really needed to talk to Alli and that was something I couldn't tell Drew. He told me about what he talked about in therapy and how he had run out. He wasn't sure why he self destructed relationships, but I was determined to help him find out. Since Drew woke up, I made a promise to myself that I'd help Drew get better. I couldn't go through losing him again. I couldn't, for Adam's sake, the sake of Degrassi, and the sake of myself.

"Hello?" Alli answered.

"Hey Alli. Can I talk to you about Drew?" I could hear Alli fidgeting on the other end of the line.

"Clare," she complained. "I was trying to forget about Drew."

"I know Alli, but please. Just a few questions." Alli sighed.

"Fine. Shoot."

"Has Drew ever said anything to you that's seemed out of character? Before the boiler room incident." I was fishing for something. I just didn't know what.

"No," she said impatiently. "What is this about Clare?"

"What did he say after the boiler room thing?" I asked, ignoring her previous statement.

"I don't know. Something about him cheating on me because he didn't deserve me. Some crap like that. I don't know. It made no sense." _Yes!_ I thought in my head. I was onto something.

"Did he ever say anything like that before?" I asked frantically.

"Why do you care?"

"Just answer please," I interrupted.

"Yeah. When we first got together at the dance he said that if we dated, if would only be a matter of time before I dumped him." I light bulb went off in my head. This was it.

"Alright. I have to go. Thanks Alli," I exclaimed before hanging up. As soon as I put down the phone, I pulled out of laptop and started to write an email.

Drew's POV

"What do you want to talk about?" Kara asked. I gave her an incredulous look. I was sure she was going to try to pry stuff out of me. "I promise I won't make you do anything you're not ready to do," she swore.

"Well," I trailed off. "I want to finish our conversation from yesterday. Sorry for freaking out."

"It's alright Drew. Everyone goes through moments like that. I was perfectly understandable. Not everyone can confront their problems easily. It takes time and hard work. So is there a reason why you self destruct relationships?"

"I'm not really sure if I do it consciously. I just do stupid things whenever something is going well." She nodded.

"Like what?" she asked.

"You know I cheated on Alli," I mumbled. Kara clicked her mouse a few times while staring at the computer screen. A moment later she turned to me.

"I got an email earlier today," Kara said randomly. I gave her a confused look. "From a friend of yours. Clare Edwards." I was still confused. Why would Clare email Kara?

"And?"

"She says she might be able to help you find the answers you're looking for."

"How?" I asked dumbly.

"She talked to Alli. She told her that you hinted to Alli on multiple occasions that didn't deserve her. Why did you do that?" I was angry the second I heard her say Alli. Why would Clare talk to her? I hated her. Why would Alli tell Clare something personal about our relationship? Does the whole freaking world know everything about our relationship? I took a breath and my anger calmed down. I couldn't be mad a Clare. I'm sure she has good intentions. I mean, she's said Clare. "Well," Kara prompted. I suddenly remembered she asked a question.

"Because I didn't," I said in a still confused voice.

"Did that fact affect your relationship at all?" she asked.

"I don't know. Maybe." I still didn't understand how this was helping.

"Is it possible that you cheated on Alli, thereby destroying your relationship, because you were afraid she was going to break up with you?" I was silent. That was it. I was scared. Of course, lust was part of it, but everything was going great and that's when I knew that I needed to end it. I didn't even realize it but Bianca provided me with a way to end things with Alli. That way, I was hoping, I wouldn't be the one getting hurt. Oh how I was wrong.

"I'm guessing that's a yes?" I nodded at her. "Why did you think Alli was going to break up with you?" Even though I was still a little unsure about all this, I responded with confidence.

"She was going to have to realize that I wasn't worth it. She thought I was this great guy but I wasn't. Sooner or later she would realize I was nothing. I am nothing. Then she would leave. That's why I ruin things like that. I don't want people to realize what I know is true."

"And you truly believe you don't have worth?" she asked. I nodded. "But why? You have so much potential."

"I don't know why. People have just been telling me that my whole life. After a while I starting believing them. Can you blame me?"

"Drew, I'm going to do everything in my power to make you see how much you are really worth. It's going to be a grueling next few weeks. But I hope that when you go back to school, you will be a happier, healthier Drew Torres."

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**Thoughts? :)**


	42. Chapter 42

**Author's Notes: I hope you like this. It's not a filler, but it's sort of short. I hope it's okay :) I haev been having a little trouble writing this because of everything going on in Degrassi, but I hope that it won't affect me anymore. I had hopes to finnish this story before school started again, but I'm not sure if that will happen (probably not). I don't know if you guys think that's a good thing or a bad thing haha. I expected to write more over the summer, but that (sadly) didn't happen. Sorry. **

**This chapter is dedicated to my friend Stef. She's been with me through the course of this story. She's read it, She's given me ideas on what to write, and she's given me paper (so much paper) everyday in math class so I could write. She's so supportive of it and I'm pretty sure this story wouldn't be where it is without her. Thank you Stef, for everything. Here is you're dedicated chapter 42 :) **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi. **

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Drew's POV

"Are you ready for school?" my mom called to me. I looked in the mirror one last time. I was wearing navy blue basketball short, a gold tee shirt, and white and blue sneakers. My hair was gelled exactly how I liked it. I smiled and walked down stairs. Today was going to be my first day back at school in nearly 3 months. These past few weeks I've been getting treatment for my issues. It was grueling, but I felt better now than I have in years. I finally felt like I was normal. I knew it would still be a long road to recovery, but I was glad I was off to such a good start.

I was nervous to be going back. What if people treated me differently? I was used to being the big man on campus. Now that everyone knew about me, would they still treat me like the guy I was?

I wanted to surprise my friends so no one except Adam and Mr. Simpson knew I was coming back today.

"Finally," Adam joked. I punched him lightly and sat down to eat breakfast: a bowl of Life cereal. After eating breakfast, I grabbed my bag. I stood by the door and waited for Adam. He came running down the stairs with his backpack.

"Ready?" I asked. I was driving us to school. My mom and social worker were afraid that I wasn't ready to drive, since I was on suicide watch, but my therapist convinced them to let me.

"Yep. Let's go." Adam and I walked out to the car. We both got in and I drove us to Degrassi. The drive was short. When we pulled into the parking lot, I slipped sunglasses on. Adam laughed.

"Trying to look cool?" he asked. I laughed.

"No. I just want to fly under the radar," I said getting out of the car. Adam followed suit. I grabbed my messenger bag out of the car and slung it over my shoulder. I slammed the car door and Adam and I started walking towards Degrassi.

As we approached the front steps, heads started to turn and I heard a lot of people whispering. I understood. I haven't been in school in three months so people were surprised to see me here. It also might be because I tried to kill myself.

"Drew?"I heard an eager voice call. I turned around and saw K.C running over to me, Jenna in tow. I took off my sunglasses. "Drew! You're back!" He was smiling widely. We did our handshake.

"Yeah," I laughed.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked.

"I wanted it to be a surprise," I explained. K.C laughed.

"Andrew, I gotta go. See you later," Adam said.

"Okay. See you." I smiled and Adam walked away.

"I have to go, too," Jenna said. "I'm glad you're back, Drew," she said genuinely. I smiled at her. "Bye," she said giving K.C a kiss.

"Bye," he said as she walked off. "So what's new my man?" he asked me.

"You know, the usual. Suicide watch, therapy, rehab, etc. It's really exciting," I said sarcastically. K.C and I started walking into Degrassi. I could feel people's eyes on me. It was weird. The whispers continued all the way down the hall to my locker. K.C left to his locker and I walked to mine alone.

After grabbing the books I needed, I started to walk to homeroom. On the way a few people stopped me. I talked to them briefly before continuing my walk. I saw no sign of Clare. She was probably already in homeroom. I turned to corner and saw Clare through the window. I was correct, she was in homeroom. I smiled and walked into the room. Clare turned around.

"Drew?" she exclaimed. Her face went from confusion to joy. She ran over to me and I gave her a tight bear hug. When I pulled away, she was smiling. "You're back!"

"Yep," I said smiling.

"Why didn't you tell me? I thought we were friends!" she joked. I laughed and decided to play along.

"I had more important people to tell." Clare fake pouted and I laughed. "I wanted to surprise you," I explained truthfully.

The bell rang and Clare and I both took our seats. During the morning announcements we shared looks. Clare fake glared at me as I silently laughed at her. I stuck my tongue out at her, causing her to laugh out loud.

"Clare, please pay attention," Coach Armstrong chided. Clare blushed. When Coach turned his head, I whispered to her.

"Miss Edwards. Always the trouble maker," I joked. Clare slapped my forearm. I smiled at her. Too soon, the bell rang. I said bye to Clare and prepared myself to face the rest of my day.

Clare's POV

I walked into English in a cheerful mood. Drew was back, which was a good thing. It was spring, my favorite season. It was a time of rebirth and renewal. I was wearing a floral dress with a teal cardigan. My hair was in bouncy curls and my make up was simple. I felt pretty. Today felt like one of those days where I could do anything, as Alli would say.

I missed Alli, I thought as I took my seat. She still went to the All-girls school across town. Ever since the whole Drew incident, things have been strained. We talk, but not like we used to. I'm not judgmental anymore, but I just can't see myself staying close to someone who would do what Alli did to Drew.

Before I could think about Alli for another second, Eli and Adam came walking over to their seats. Adam looks just as cheerful as I do, while Eli looks annoyed.

"Hey guys," I chirped.

"Hey Clare. Did you see Drew?" Adam asked with a smile. I nodded.

"Yeah I saw him in homeroom," I replied before shifting my attention to Eli.

"Hey grumpy," I teased, putting my hand on his. He shrugged me off. I frowned and looked at Adam. He shrugged. "What's wrong?" I pressed.

"What's wrong is that I walked to homeroom this morning and I saw you hugging Drew," he replied sourly. I sighed.

"Eli, he's just a friend," I huffed. Just then, Mrs. Dawes started the lesson. I gave Adam a look and began to take notes. I didn't feel like having this argument with Eli again.

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**Was it alright? Let me know by leaving a review :) please **


	43. Chapter 43

**Author's Note: HEY! I'm so sorry. I've had HUGE writer's block. Then I lost cable and internet for a few days because of the hurricane. While it was gone, I re-read this entire story from start to finish and I edited a lot. I'm uploading changes now! Anyway, please enjoy this chapter :) Chapter 44 will be up later tonight :) Thanks for reading this and bearing with me. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi. **

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Clare's POV

I walked through the halls looking for Eli. After our little disagreement in English, I felt bad. I didn't do anything wrong, but I didn't want Eli to be mad. I just wanted to end this fight and go back to where we used to be.

At last I found him. He was sitting alone near the JT Yorke memorial. I walked quietly to sit next to him.

"Hey Eli. Do you want to have lunch together?" I asked. Eli turned and looked at me. His face showed no emotion.

"Lunch? With me? What, you don't want to sit with your precious Drew?" he asked in a snarky tone. I sighed.

"Eli. Drew and I are just friends. Today I want to eat with my boyfriend." I tried to keep my tone light, not showing my annoyance. I was a little annoyed at Eli's jealousy. Hopefully it would go away soon.

"In that case, the hearse awaits," Eli said with a smirk. He stood up and swung his arm around my shoulder.

We were walking out to the car when we hear Adam call us. We both turned and saw our friend coming towards us. He looked out of breath. We waited for him to start talking.

"I have to take a test now. Would you guys mind sitting with Drew? He has no one to sit with and it's his first day back. I'd feel better if someone was there to check on him. Make sure he actually eats." Adam seemed a little worried. I nodded.

"Sure. We don't mind." I turned to Eli and saw him frowning.

"Thanks guy. I gotta go!" Adam ran back into Degrassi. I watched him leave and then turned back to Eli.

"What's wrong?" I asked, letting a little annoyance seep into my tone.

"I thought you said you didn't want to eat with Drew," he accused.

"I said I wanted to go out with you, but Adam asked us to sit with Drew. Why is it such a big problem?"

"You sure jumped at the chance to spend more time with him." Eli was so mistrusting. I threw my hands up in the air.

"He a friend, Eli. How many times do I have to tell you? Can we just go to lunch?" I was getting annoyed. When had Eli become so difficult?

"You go. I'm not. Have fun with Drew," Eli said sourly.

"Fine, Eli," I said. I walked back into Degrassi angrily.

Drew's POV

This morning was pretty brutal. Everyone was walking on eggshells around me, like they didn't know I was going to do next. It sucks. I caught a lot of people staring at me in my classes. I was used to girls staring at me, but not like this. They were all looking for a flaw. Some teachers made it a big deal when I would participate. They were trying to make me feel better, but it was just annoying. If they would just let me lay low, I'd be happy.

Luckily now it was lunch. I was glad I could do something normal. On my way to the caf I saw Clare and Eli walking outside. I sighed, unsure of who to sit with now. Clare and K.C were my only friends, pretty much. Now Clare was going out with Eli and K.C left for lunch to relieve Jenna. I was friendless.

I stepped into the lunch room. It looked intimidating. I walked through the rows of tables, looking for someone to sit with. I looked for Adam, but he wasn't around. I decided to just sit in the JT Yorke memorial garden. I left the caf and walked to the garden. It was empty, luckily. I took a seat and started to eat my lunch.

A few minutes later, Clare came in. She wore a small smile. Unconsciously a smile appeared on my face. I was happy to see Clare.

"Hey Drew," she said quietly, taking a seat next to me. "Eating alone?"

"Yeah," I replied. "It's not a big deal. Weren't you going to eat with Eli?" Last I saw they were leaving. Had they come back so soon?

"Yeah, but I didn't want you to eat all alone. Adam said he was taking a test so I decided to stay." Clare sent a smile my way. I was a little suspicious that she was just checking up on me, but I let it go. I was happy to have company regardless of the reason.

"Do you want half?" I asked, pointing to my peanut butter sandwich. I noticed Clare didn't have any lunch with her.

"No thanks. It's yours. I'm not really hungry anyway," she said unconvincingly. I rolled my eyes and gave her half.

"It's not a big deal, Clare," I assured. I knew she would be worried that I wasn't eating, but I am. I sighed. People weren't very trusting of me right now. I guess I'd take some time to earn it back.

"Thank you," Clare said, taking the sandwich. She started eating and we sat in companionable silence.

I looked over at her and smiled. Clare and I have been spending more and more time together. We were getting really close. She made me feel better, happy. I was really glad we were friends. I felt different with Clare, but I couldn't exactly pin point why. I don't really care about analyzing things with Clare. As long as she made me happy, that's all that matters.


	44. Chapter 44

**Author's Note: Chapter 44 up as promised :) Enjoyyy. I can put chapter 45 up... tomorrow? It's done so I'll post it tomorrow. Special thanks to . for you AMAZING review :) I had a huge laughing fit over the Katie thing, because I was thinking the same think :P **

**Disclaimer: I don't know Degrassi. **

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Drew's POV

I've been back at school for a few days and things have gotten a little better. People still treat me differently, but they're starting to get better. At lunch, I've been sitting with Adam, Eli, Clare, and K.C. We have our own table. I'm getting better at ignoring the stares from people. None of them matter. I don't care what they think of me. I'm still going to therapy once a week. It's helping a lot. I've been feeling really good lately.

Clare is part of the reason I'm so happy, but not all of it. Unlike with other girls, I don't need Clare's shallow attention to be happy. I'm happy around Clare because we can really talk. I can be myself. It makes me feel good. I don't have to put on an act in front of her. She likes me for who I am. Something is different about her. She doesn't make me feel like Alli did. I don't have to be with her to be happy. I don't get miserable when I'm away from her. I feel healthy with Clare. With Alli, I had really happy days and super low ones. With Clare, everything seems normal.

The worst thing about Clare, though, is Eli. Eli is always cold towards me. He never used to be. We used to be cordial to each other. Now he ignores my existence. It makes me feel like an outcast. Whenever I'm near Clare, he sulks. I bet he's just jealous. He really doesn't have a reason to be. Clare loved Eli. She wouldn't leave him for me. She just sees me as a friend. And that's all I see her as, most of the time.

Adam's POV

I was sitting in study hall trying to finish a book for English. I couldn't really concentrate because there were two girls gossiping at the table behind me. I faded in and out of their conversation, trying to focus on Shakespeare, but failing. Sometimes Shakespeare is just so boring.

"… such a hypocrite. I mean, he cheated on her first. He deserved it."

"Yeah but they were so much more serious the second time, everyone could see it. It was a bitchy thing for her to do. He tried to kill himself."

"I don't really care. If he can't take something like that, he shouldn't do it to other people. Alli didn't try to kill herself. She was stronger."

"Drew had a lot going on. Alli should've been more understanding."

"I don't care what anyone says. Drew Torres is a heartbreaking pig. I don't feel bad for him at all."

I turned around, very annoyed. The two girls gossiping were unfamiliar to me. I didn't care who they were. They were about to be put in their place. I was furious at them. Clearing my throat, both girls turned to me. Recognition crossed on their features. They know they're in trouble.

"Whichever one of you is talking badly about my brother better shut their mouth. You two know nothing about Drew. You have no business judging him or talking about him like that. He's a person you know. If he ever heard you say those things, he would die. So shut your ignorant mouths. You don't know anything." I was steaming. I hated that random people felt like they could voice their opinions on what they know nothing about. My brother is starting tin get better. The last thing he needs is people like this bringing him down.

The two girls looked terrified, but I was satisfied. I grabbed my book and moved to a different location. Suddenly, I noticed Fiona watching me.

"What do you want?" I grumbled quietly. We were both behind one of the book shelves now. No one would disturb us.

"Nice job putting those girls in their place," she complimented. I nodded a thank you and looked back at my book. "I miss you, Adam." I looked up at Fiona in surprise.

"Now you miss me?" I asked in an annoyed tone. "Where were you when I needed you? You didn't call me once when Drew woke up. You didn't care." I was angry with Fiona. I hate that she just left me like that. She means a lot to me and I thought her feelings for me were the same.

"I know. I'm sorry Adam. I should've called. I was just nervous to talk to you. I was afraid you'd be mad." She looked regretful.

"I am mad, Fiona. Why did you leave me? Why couldn't you have just stayed with me?"

"Adam, I did what I felt was best. You have to admit, you weren't able to have a real relationship with me. You needed be single for awhile while you dealt with everything. You needed to focus on your family, not me." I was about to argue, but I couldn't. Fiona was right. I couldn't deny it.

"I know. I get it. I just really missed you, too," I said sadly.

Drew's POV

"Hey guys," Adam said as he bounded to our lunch table. K.C and I had just been talking about basketball, while Eli and Clare were in their own little world. I was shocked they hadn't started fighting yet.

"What's up?" I asked. My brother seemed more happy than usual.

"Fiona and I got back together," he exclaimed. I smiled. I was happy for him.

"That's awesome man," K.C said sincerely.

"I knew things would work out, young grass hopper," Eli joked. I laughed.

"See bro. I told you things would work out."

"Thanks guys," Adam said. He took a seat. A few minutes later Fiona joined us. It was just like old times. The conversation at the table revolved around classes and end of the year projects and tests.

"Eli, we have the end of the year project for Biology due soon. Do you want to work on it afterschool?" Eli nodded and they both started talking about ideas.

"Drew, I can't tutor you in math anymore," K.C said apologetically. "I promised Jenna I'd be home right after school from now until the end of the school year. She needs a break from Briana." I nodded in understanding.

"It's cool. It's not like it really matters how I do on exams anyway. I missed so much school this year that I'll be repeating grade 11, anyway." It sucks to be repeating grade 11, but at least I'll have all my friends in my classes.

"Hey, don't think that way," Adam chided. "Mom still wants to see good marks." I rolled my eyes.

"I could tutor you," Clare suggested. I smiled.

"Yeah, Eli and I are working afterschool. You two could work too."

"Sure," I said with a smile. I love spending time with Clare. It didn't matter if we were studying or just hanging out. We always have fun.

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**So what do you think? :) **


	45. Chapter 45

**Author's Note: So, I wrote this chapter way back last school year, but I had the idea for a long time before that. I'm very excited to be able to finally post it :) Enjoy. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi. **

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Adam's POV

Eli and I were hanging out in the Biology room after school. We were trying to think of an idea for our end of the year project. We've been spit balling for 45 minutes and we still had nothing. Eli seemed annoyed and distracted.

"Everything okay?" I asked. Eli turned to look at me.

"Why'd you have to suggest for Clare to tutor Drew?" he asked. I laughed at Eli's over reaction.

"I didn't suggest it, she did. What's the big deal? They're only studying." Eli's jealousy was sometimes too much. I know Clare gets sick of it. It's been pushing her away lately.

"I don't like that she's always around Drew." Eli's tone was harsh.

"Dude, control your jealousy or you'll push her away," I told him. Eli sighed and turned to a fresh sheet of paper.

"So for the project…"

Drew's POV

Clare and I were sitting on the front steps of Degrassi. It was a warm afternoon. Eli and Adam were doing something so Clare and I were studying while we waited for them. We've been working for about an hour. Clare was sitting against the wall doing some other homework. I was attempting to do the problems Clare pointed out, but I couldn't focus.

"This is boring," I whined. "Let's do something fun," I suggested grabbing a basketball from the steps.

"Like what?" she asked eyeing the basketball.

"Let's play one on one."

"I'm terrible at basketball, Drew," she said, trying to get out of it.

"You dated K.C," I reminded as she half glared at me. "You have to be able to shot a basket."

"Fine," she agreed standing up. I smiled widely and walked over to the basketball court in the parking lot. It was empty since everyone had already left.

"I'll start," I said lining up on the three point line. I passed her the ball and she passed it back. I expertly dribbled and made a three point shot. Clare looked in awe. I smiled. "They don't call me the star player for nothing," I joked.

"You're so cocky," Clare shot back. She grabbed the ball and went to the three point line. After passing the ball, Clare started to dribble. I half blocked her. I was going easy on her. There was no reason to play full out. Clare looked into my eyes for a moment and I lost it. I got lost in her beautiful blue eyes. Before I knew it, she passed by me and shot the ball into the basket.

"Yay!" she yelled. I laughed.

"Good job," I said giving her a high five. My hand tingled where she touched it.

I grabbed the ball again and made another three point shot. Ten minutes later Clare and I were still playing. The score was 5-3; I was winning. I was dribbling at the three point line when Clare stole the ball. She starts skipping around with it.

"That's traveling," I accused with a laugh.

"I bet you can't catch me," she taunted.

"Wanna bet?" I asked taking off at full speed. Clare squealed as I chased her. We ran around the court until I finally caught her in a gigantic bear hug. "Got you," I declare triumphantly. Clare tried to wiggle out of my grip but I wouldn't let her go. Suddenly, we heard someone clear their throat. I looked behind me and Eli and Adam were standing there. Adam looked like his normal happy self, but Eli looked pissed. I dropped my arms from around Clare.

"Hi guys," Clare said cheerfully. She walked over and gave Eli a peck on the cheek. I glanced away, my eyes meeting with Adam's. His expression was one of mild disapproval. I rolled my eye. Clare and I were just friends.

"Hey," Eli said in a clipped tone. I hated when he was like that around Clare.

"How was your thing?" I asked casually.

"Good, the project should be started tomorrow," Adam replied. "What were you guys doing?" Eli glared at me.

"I got bored so I convinced Clare to play basketball with me. I won," I boasted with a smile. Clare's jaw dropped.

"Only by 2 point," she exclaimed in defense. I chuckled softly.

"Want me to drive you home now?" Eli asked Clare.

"Um… sure," she decided, caught off guard by his hastiness. "Bye Adam. Bye Drew," she said with a smile. She grabbed Eli's hand and they walked to Eli's car. I watched Clare's retreating figure.

"Drew," Adam nudged me. "You're staring." I quickly looked down, then up at Adam.

"Let's go home," I said walking back to the stairs. I grabbed my messenger bag and swung it over my shoulder. I pulled out my car keys and Adam and I walked to my car.

Eli's POV

"What was that about?" I asked Clare once we were in the car.

"We were just having fun, Eli," she replied. I gripped the steering wheel harder.

"That looked like more than just fun," I said sourly.

"Why are you so upset?" she asked me. I sighed.

"Drew's edging me out, Clare. Do you not see that?" I asked softly. I was more hurt by this than angry.

"Eli, I know who I love and I know who I'm with. You." She smiled at me and grabbed my hand. I started to calm down a little.

"You and Drew are always together. I feel like you never want to spend time with me. You forgot me," I mumbled.

"I could never forget you, Eli," she promised.

"Remember your promise?" I asked. "You promised you'd never leave me."

"I remember Eli," she murmured. The rest of the drive was silent.

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**Thoughts? :) Please let me know what you think **


	46. Chapter 46

**Hey. So... this chapter has been half written for a little while. I actually just wrote Eli's POV now... like 5 minutes ago. I might rewrite it eventually, but I really wanted to get this up. I've been in a really horrible mood today and last night. I was so close to posting a new chapter where Drew and Adam are killing in a car crash... I thought it would make me feel better. Instead, I luckily decided to post this. I just feel like my writing is so.. bad. I'm just feeling horrible. But I really hope you like this chapter. If it seems rushed, I'm sorry, but I guess we all saw this coming. I had planned on stretching this out a bit. I wanted to post this chapter later on in the story, but I figured I would be fine here. So review and let me know what you think.**

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Clare's POV

I have been feeling really suffocated by Eli lately. He is so possessive and jealous. We don't have fun anymore. Our relationship is just causing us both stress. I don't want to break things off with him, but we're both just so unhappy. Despite the fact that I promised to never leave him, I don't have any choice anymore. Breaking promises aren't something I'm proud of but I was under a lot of pressure when I promised Eli that. I just want a relationship that makes me happy, not all this stress.

I decided I would talk to Eli today. I want to make our relationship what it used to be. It's Saturday. I have nothing planed and I know Eli will be home. I quickly grabbed my jacket and headed out the door.

During the whole walk there, I played a bunch of happy scenarios in my head. Maybe Eli and I can be fixed. We just need some time together. Then we can be the couple we used to be. It didn't take me long to reach his house. I walked over to his house quickly and rang the door bell, waiting at the doorstep until the door opened to reveal Eli's face. It was sullen.

"What are you doing here?" he asked in a harsh voice.

"Coming to spend time with my boyfriend," I said sweetly, ignoring his bad mood. Eli scoffed.

"I thought you'd be busy doing something with Drew." My fists tightened at my sides.

"You know what, forget it," I said through gritted teeth. I turned on my heels and started to walk away from Eli's house.

"Wait, Clare!" he called grabbing my shoulder. I shook him off, but stayed where I was, waiting for him to say something. "I'm sorry."

"No you're not," I exploded, shocking even myself. Eli stared at me completely flabbergasted. "You make comments like that all the time. I always try to ignore them but I can't anymore. You don't trust me. You're always in a bad mood. You're suffocating me, Eli!"

"Clare, I'm sorry. I just feel like I'm losing you to Drew. He's trying to take you from me! What am I supposed to do?"

"I don't know. Just not this. I don't know if I can do this anymore. I really just need some space."

"Space?" Eli asked cynically. "Fine. Go on. Go date Drew. I don't give a shit," he said emphasizing the profanity. "You're probably hooking with him behind my back, anyway. But when he sleeps with some girl and breaks your heart, don't come crying to me." Eli's cold attitude stung. Every word was aimed to hurt. They did their job.

"I would never cheat on you Eli. I can't believe you'd say that! You don't know anything, not about Drew and not about me. I loved you, but it doesn't matter anymore. You're not the guy I fell in love with. We're done." Eli's face showed anger, but also hurt. I turned away, tears starting to fall down my face and sobs started to wrack my whole body. I ran down the street as quickly as my legs could carry me.

Eli's POV

Clare ran down the street and the full extent of what I just did settled over me. I lost Clare. Everything I tried so hard to prevent happened. All because of me. I pushed her away, right into the arms of Drew Freaking Torres. I slammed the door harshly before collapsing against it. I threw whatever was in my hand and I heard the sound of glass shattering, just like my entire existence.

Strong emotions flooded through me at a dizzying rate. Nothing in my head was making any sense. My head pounded and my hand flew up to put pressure on the spot of pain. Only then was when I realized that my eyes were damp.

Clare's POV

I ran out of Eli's house with tears in my eyes. I don't know what came over me. I promised him that I'd never leave him and here I was breaking his heart. He said a lot of mean things, but he was upset. It's all my fault. Things between us have been strained lately; Eli's been overbearing and suffocating. I couldn't take it anymore.

I stopped running so I could call Drew. I need him now. He is the only person that can make me feel better, like everything's going to be okay.

"Hello?"

"Can you come pick me up?" I choked into the phone.

"Clare, what's wrong?" he asked frantically. I heard his keys jingle and a door open.

"I'll tell you when I see you. I'm a block away from Eli's house."

"I'll be right there," he promised. I hung up and smiled a little bit. I knew I could always count on Drew.

I heard a car pull up to me. I wiped my teary eyes and saw Drew in his car. He parked and quickly got out.

"What's wrong?" he asked as he slammed his car door. He ran over to me and looked me over, making sure I was unharmed. That was one of Drew's most dominant qualities, his protectiveness.

"I broke up with Eli," I muttered. I looked at Drew. An emotion I couldn't identify crossed his face. He quickly covered it with a sympathetic expression.

"I'm sorry, Clare," he said sympathetically. He gave me a hug and I started to cry again. "Here, we can go to my house and talk," he said after a minute. I nodded and got in the car.

The drive to the Torres' was silent, but comfortable. As we drove, the sun slowly slipped under the horizon. I shut my tear stained eyes and drifted into sleep.

Drew's POV

I parked in the driveway and saw Clare sleeping in the passenger seat. I smiled. She looked so peaceful. I couldn't bring myself to wake her. I sighed. I got out of the car and walked around to the passenger seat. I opened the door. Clare looked like an angel when she slept. I smiled and gingerly picked her up, careful not to wake her. I shut the car door with my foot and walked to the front door. I knocked, hoping Adam was still in the living room.

Adam opened the door and his expression was one of bewilderment.

"She called me to pick her up from Eli's and she fell asleep on the way here," I explained. He nodded.

"Where should I put her?" I asked. "Your room?"

"My room is a mess. Isn't yours clean?" he asked. I nodded and I began to walk up the stairs. A small smile grew on my lips. As wrong as it was, I liked the thought of Clare in my bed. I quickly shock the thoughts from my head.

After laying Clare down in my room, I walked into the living room to see Adam. He was watching MythBusters. I hopped over the couch next to him.

"So when are you gonna tell her?" he ask.

"Tell her what?" I replied, staring at the TV screen.

"That you're in love with her," he said simply. I now turned to look at him.

"I'm not," I insisted.

"Okay, whatever," he said, momentarily letting it go. I was grateful that Adam's stubbornness had taken the day off. I wasn't in the mood to be interrogated.

Clare's POV

I stirred and felt myself wrapped up in something warm. My eyes stayed shut. After some tossing, I realized I couldn't remember falling asleep in a bed. I slowly opened my eyes and looked around at the unfamiliar room. My elbows prop me up as I tried to identify my surroundings.

I was in a bed, covered with a navy blue down comforter. I peeled it off and saw the dark brown sheets. The bed itself was made of brown wood. In the far corner of the room was a closet. There was a pile of clothes lying on the floor next to it. To the right of that is a brown dresser. The top of the dresser is covered with sports trophies and. In the corner next to the bed is a desk with a stack of school books on it, pencils and pens casually scattered. The last place I looked was next to the bed. There is a small night table with a lamp, an alarm clock/iHome, and a note. I opened the note, as it was addressed to me.

Clare,

You fell asleep in the car and I didn't want to wake you. Adam and I are downstairs in the living room.

-Drew-

I smiled while reading the note. I was in Drew's room. It made sense: the clothes, the trophies. I've never been in Drew's room before now. I never had the need to be. I've been in Adam's to do projects or to see him, but not Drew. His room was pretty much how I expected it to be, not that I pictured it before. It was typical. A little messy, boyish with sports equipment and trophies. Nothing like Eli's.

Eli. It wasn't just some bad dream. It was really. I really ended things with Eli. Guilt engulfed me.

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**What'd you think? I'd really like to know. And I'd like to thank EVERYONE who has kept with this story. I love you all and you are my inspiration to continue this story. I used to lovebut and I'm hoping I can get back to that place. I hope you enjoyed it. Another one is coming very soon. Love you all. I thank everyone of you who reviewd previous chapters. Every single one realy means the world to me. I love you all. **

**-Caitlin- **


	47. Chapter 47

**Author's Note: Hey! So I did so much writing/typing yesterday! I will have a new chapter up soon! It's weird, since I hand write a lot of stuff and I write really out of order, someone of the writing in this chapter is from last june! Reading it again, it felt like years since I wrote this. Anyway, I hope you enjoy it. Like I said I have a lot of writing done for my lovely readers! This story is moving along! I'm excited. So here is chapter 47, right in time for the new season starting today! I saw the new episode at Party with Degrassi. It's good! So enjoy and leave a review! **

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Drew's POV

Adam and I were playing video games when I heard light footsteps approaching. I paused the game and turned to the door, barely hearing Adam's protests.

Clare walked into the doorway sheepishly. Her curls were messy from sleeping and her clothes were wrinkled, but the most apparent change in Clare was her sad expression. Despite these things, she looked beautiful.

"Hey guys," she said quietly. She shifted her weight from one leg to another, looking uncomfortable. Only then did I realize I was staring.

"Hey Clare," I replied brightly. Adam greeted her as well. "How are you feeling?"

"Like a horrible person," she mumbled, walking towards the couch. I patted the seat between Adam and me.

"Want to talk about it?" Clare took a seat and nodded. Adam quickly pushed himself off the couch, receiving a questioning look from Clare.

"Eli's my best friend and he's devastated. I can't sit here and listen to you two talk about him behind his back." Clare frowned at Adam's words, looking guiltier. I shot Adam a glare. What the hell is he doing?

"Maybe I was wrong," Clare said quietly. I was still glaring daggers at Adam. Why does he want Clare to feel guilty for doing what she thought was best?

"Maybe," Adam allowed. I quickly stepped in before he could plant more doubt in her head.

"No, Clare. You wouldn't have done it unless it was the best thing to do. I know you." I prayed that Clare would listen to me. She can't get back together with Eli.

"You're right, Drew," she stuttered. "Eli said a lot of mean things today and he really hurt me. I don't want to be with someone who hurts me." Clare's mind seemed to be made up. Adam left for his room, the interesting part of the conversation for him being over. Clare and I stayed on the couch. She's helped me with all of my issues this year so of course I would be here for her.

That's all. I'm just here to be Clare's friend. At least, that's what I tell myself. I know that's a lie, though. I feel something much stronger for Clare. She's been there for me through everything. I never thought I'd see Clare Edwards romantically, but now I can't imagine seeing her any other way. I like Clare a lot more than I've ever liked anyone. I like her more than a lot.

I'm in love with Clare Edwards.

Clare's POV

Two weeks. It's been two weeks since my break up with Eli. Two weeks since I started to spend every minute of every day with Drew Torres. I don't regret any of it. He's been making me feel a lot better. Drew makes me feel happy. He's always around, but he never feels clingy or suffocating. He feels light and fun and fresh. Not like Eli.

With Eli and I, the last two weeks have been full of awkward eye contact and pretending the other doesn't exist. When I see him at lunch and in the halls, things are so tense it makes me feel sick. He really hates me. In English, I try to be polite, but he and Adam always ignore me. I know Adam doesn't hate me, but he's picked his friendship with Eli over his friendship with me, it seems.

The whole school stares at me. By now, news of our break up is common knowledge. I can sometimes here what they say about me. Some people side with me, some don't.

"I don't blame her for breaking up with him. He always looks so angry," one girl behind me said as I stretch for gym.

"I would leave my boyfriend for Drew Torres," Marisol Lewis said to her auburn haired friend when I walked past the bench they were sitting on between classes.

I wasn't happy that people thought I left Eli for Drew. I didn't. Drew and I are just friends, nothing more. It's not fair to Eli that people think that. It's also not fair to me. Some people hate me because they think I cheated on Eli, which I never did. I would never cheat on someone I was dating. No matter what, I would never do that.

I just hope our whole break up blows over soon. I know it will eventually. At Degrassi, there's always going to be a new scandal.

Eli's POV

I let the tears flow down my face shamelessly. I didn't matter, no one was around to see them anyway and I was beyond caring about everything. Nothing matters anymore. Clare is gone, and with her went any reason to be happy.

A giant cloud of hopelessness enveloped me. Every single promise she ever made was broken. Her word doesn't mean anything. It never did.

I hate her. But I love her. I'm in this weird state of emotion. My mind hates her with all the emotion I can muster, but my heart loves her with every fiber of my being, so much that I can't process it.

I doubt I will ever be able to forgive her. She can't be trusted. Everything she says is meaningless. I can't deal with the disappointment anymore. Not just from her, but from everyone. Anymore disappointment will crush me until I'm beyond repair, if I'm not already.

The sad thing is: I saw this coming. I saw the way that she looked at Drew Torres like he was the only person on the planet. I also saw the way he looked at her, like she was water to a dying man. Like she was everything he ever needed in life. As much as I wish I could, I can't deny how he feels about her, based on what I can see. I've never seen Drew as happy with anyone as he is with Clare. She deserved him.

However, this newfound understand has done little to ease my anger or pain. Why should Drew have everything he's ever wanted? Everything that I've always wanted. I don't understand why she wants him and not me? But I really do see. She wants him because he's everything she always wanted in a guy, the polar opposite of me. She's finally happy now that she's rid of me.

The insult to the injury is the humiliation. The fact that I need to walk around school every day watching the girl I love, love Drew Torres. Everyone at schools can see how happy they are together, how happy she is without me. I can't help but feel overpowering humiliation when I hear people talk about us. They all know Drew is who she's wanted all alone. I feel like the biggest idiot in the world. I'm the idiot who loves Clare Edwards when all she wants is someone else. People pity me, but I don't want pity from anyone. I get enough from myself.

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	48. Chapter 48

**Author's Note: I am so sorry. I just want to say that I love every single person that has read, and is continuing to read this story. I love you so much. This story was the first thing that got me into writing. I will finish this, no matter what. No matter how long it takes for me to find inspiration and get back into it, I will finish. I owe it to this story and to you. I'm two years older now than when I started. I was a freshmen when this idea hit me, and now, as a junior, I realize how important it is to finish this. Not to please anyone, but to do it for myself. I love this story still, and while the writing isn't to the level that I've been writing lately, I am excited for it. I've had this chapter written for years, literally since freshman or sophomore year, and here it finally is. I actually have a lot of chapaters written on my laptop. Here's the thing... I have two way to go with this. I will either wrap it up in the next 10 or so chapters, or I will throw in a bit of a subplot and keep it going for longer. I'm not sure. I have a lot of inspiration now, but I'm afraid to lose it. I really want to finally bring this story to a close. Anyway, sorry to rambled. Enjoy this painfully short chapter. I hope that I will be posting more soon. Again, much love to anyone reading or following this story. I really appriciate all of the support for this. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi. **

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Drew's POV

I was sitting in math listening to Mr. Armstrong drone on about triangles. I sat with my head leaning on my hand. I was so bored. I looked around the room. Connor was tapping his pen next to me. Behind me, Wesley was scribbling notes a mile a minute. I looked out the window and saw Clare walking down the hall. My mouth curved into a giant smile. Clare looked up and caught my eye. She smiled like she was glad to see me, and motioned for me to come out into the hall. I looked around to see if anyone was looking. No one was, so I nodded at Clare.

"Mr. Armstrong," I said, raising my hand. He shot me an exasperated look.

"Yes Drew?" he asked. I realized I had interrupted his lesson.

"Sorry to interrupt, but can I go to the washroom?" Mr. Armstrong nodded.

"Take the pass," he reminded as he continued his lesson.

I got up, took the pass, and walked out. Clare was waiting for me. She gave me an adorable.

"How is math?" she asked cutely. I smiled at her.

"Boring," I answered honestly. "Where are you supposed to be, Miss? I teased.

"Chem," she replied. We were both lazily walking through the halls.

"Skipping class?" I mocked. "What a rebel." Clare smile at me.

"Maybe I should go back." She bit her lip, which made me roll my eyes.

"I know for a fact you know whatever you're learning," I pointed out. Clare blushed and I smile triumphantly. "See, I know you so well."

I looked at Clare and realized how much I want to kiss her, but I can't. She just broke up with Eli. Not that that would normally stop me, it's just… Clare is different.

"Drew," Clare said, breaking me out of my trance.

"Sorry, just zoning out," I said.

"Is everything okay?" she asked, putting her hand on my arm. The gesture was innocent, but it caused my heart to hammer in my chest.

"Everything's great," I assured. I knew she was asking about therapy.

"That's good" she said with a sincere smile. I couldn't help but smile back.

"Where are you supposed to be?" a voice called. Clare and I both turned around to see Principal Simpson.

"Clare was just going to the washroom," I lied, grateful there was one a few feet behind me. "I saw her and started to walk with her. It's my fault." Simpson looked at me for a second.

"Alright then, Drew. Just get back to class please," he commanded.

"Will do," I nodded. "Bye Clare." I shot her a smile and she returned it with a grateful look. I walked back to my math class with a smile on my face.

Eli's POV

I looked out the window of my class. I was bored. History held no interest for me. I continued to watch the empty hall for a while. I sighed and looked back at the board. Suddenly, I saw something out of the corner of my eye. It was Clare. My heart sped up when I saw her smiling. Then I noticed Drew walking next to her, smiling back. Furry bubbled inside me. My fists clenched. I turned away from the window and stared straight at the board.

Half an hour later, the bell rang and I bolted out of the classroom. Luckily it was time for lunch. I pushed my way to my locker and threw my books in. I grabbed my new books roughly and slammed my locker, earning stares from a group of freshman girls. I stomped off to the lunch room.

I got in and found Adam. I made my way over to where he was, but he didn't notice me until I dropped my stuff on the floor and took a seat across from him. I huffed angrily.

"What? Someone take your parking spot?" Adam joked. I glared at him. "Sorry dude. What's bugging you?"

"Your brother," I sneered. "He's always with Clare. We only broke up two weeks ago, but that doesn't stop Drew Torres from chasing his new conquest," I barked bitterly. I knew it wasn't true, but it was easy to hate Drew. Adam was frowning at me.

"That's not true," Adam reasoned.

"You bet it is. I'd be surprised if he remembers her name in a few weeks."

"They're not doing anything wrong, Eli," Adam exclaimed.

"Great, so now you're siding with Drew?"

"He's my brother! And Drew didn't do anything wrong, Eli! He didn't steal Clare away from you. She left you because you pushed her away!" At that moment I saw Fiona, Drew, Clare, and K.C walk into the lunch room. I roughly got up and grabbed my stuff.

"Go to hell," I spat before storming off.

Adam's POV

I walked into Drew's room. He was lying on his bed tossing a football.

"Eli's pissed," I told him. Drew looked at me. "Maybe you should stay away from Clare," I suggested. Drew looked troubled.

"I really like her, Adam. She makes me feel normal. Like I'm worth something," he explained quietly. How could I tell him to forget about Clare when she finally makes him feel better? I couldn't.

"I'm happy for you, Drew. Go for it."

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**I review would be lovely but any sort of acknowledgement that I posted this chapter would make me super happy! **


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